‘Modern Love’: Why Boys and Men Are Floundering, According to Therapist Terry Real
The Daily25 Mai

‘Modern Love’: Why Boys and Men Are Floundering, According to Therapist Terry Real

A session with Terry Real, a marriage and family therapist, can get uncomfortable. He’s known to mirror and amplify the emotions of his clients, sometimes cursing and nearly yelling, often in an attempt to get men in touch with the emotions they’re not used to honoring.

Real says men are often pushed to shut off their expression of vulnerability when they’re young as part of the process of becoming a man. That process, he says, can lead to myriad problems in their relationships. He sees it as his job to pull them back into vulnerability and intimacy, reconfiguring their understanding of masculinity in order to build more wholesome and connected families.

In this episode, Real explains why vulnerability is so essential to healthy masculinity and why his work with men feels more urgent than ever. He explains why he thinks our current models of masculinity are broken and what it will take to build new ones.

This episode was inspired by a New York Times Magazine piece, “How I Learned That the Problem in My Marriage Was Me” by Daniel Oppenheimer.

For more Modern Love, search for the show wherever you get your podcasts. New episodes every Wednesday.

Subscribe today at nytimes.com/podcasts or on Apple Podcasts and Spotify. You can also subscribe via your favorite podcast app here https://www.nytimes.com/activate-access/audio?source=podcatcher. For more podcasts and narrated articles, download The New York Times app at nytimes.com/app.

Episoder(2679)

Tuesday, Aug 29, 2017

Tuesday, Aug 29, 2017

By Monday, the third straight day of flooding, Hurricane Harvey had left much of the region underwater, and the city of Houston looked like a sea dotted by islands. We hear from some people in the city about the view from the ground as the waters keep rising. Guests: Alan Blinder, a Times correspondent who has been reporting from Houston; Jacqueline Herrera, who talks to us us from her home in Houston where she is, for now, staying put. For more information on today’s episode, visit nytimes.com/thedaily. Subscribe today at nytimes.com/podcasts or on Apple Podcasts and Spotify. You can also subscribe via your favorite podcast app here https://www.nytimes.com/activate-access/audio?source=podcatcher. For more podcasts and narrated articles, download The New York Times app at nytimes.com/app.

29 Aug 201720min

Monday, Aug 28, 2017

Monday, Aug 28, 2017

President Trump’s first pardon went to a wildly divisive sheriff from Arizona. So who is Joe Arpaio? And how do presidential pardons work? Guests: Fernanda Santos, the former Phoenix bureau chief of The New York Times; Adam Liptak, our Supreme Court reporter. For more information on today’s episode, visit nytimes.com/thedaily. Subscribe today at nytimes.com/podcasts or on Apple Podcasts and Spotify. You can also subscribe via your favorite podcast app here https://www.nytimes.com/activate-access/audio?source=podcatcher. For more podcasts and narrated articles, download The New York Times app at nytimes.com/app.

28 Aug 201732min

Friday, Aug. 25,  2017

Friday, Aug. 25, 2017

The feud between President Trump and Jeff Flake, a Republican senator from Arizona, reveals a great deal about tensions in Washington. Guests: Jonathan Martin, a national political correspondent for The Times; Mr. Flake, who you can hear more from in tomorrow’s episode of “The New Washington.” For more information on today’s episode, visit nytimes.com/thedaily. Subscribe today at nytimes.com/podcasts or on Apple Podcasts and Spotify. You can also subscribe via your favorite podcast app here https://www.nytimes.com/activate-access/audio?source=podcatcher. For more podcasts and narrated articles, download The New York Times app at nytimes.com/app.

25 Aug 201720min

Thursday, Aug. 24,  2017

Thursday, Aug. 24, 2017

The United States recently noticed something unusual in North Korea’s weapons program: Its missiles started to work. Why? We discuss a surprising discovery. Guest: William J. Broad, who has reported on missile defense for decades. For more information on today’s episode, visit nytimes.com/thedaily. Subscribe today at nytimes.com/podcasts or on Apple Podcasts and Spotify. You can also subscribe via your favorite podcast app here https://www.nytimes.com/activate-access/audio?source=podcatcher. For more podcasts and narrated articles, download The New York Times app at nytimes.com/app.

24 Aug 201717min

Wednesday, Aug. 23,  2017

Wednesday, Aug. 23, 2017

The president says “things are going to be different” in Afghanistan: no more “nation-building,” just killing terrorists. But a closer examination suggests this new strategy looks a lot like the strategy of the last 16 years. Guest: Matt Rosenberg, who covered Afghanistan from 2008 to 2014. For more information on today’s episode, visit nytimes.com/thedaily. Subscribe today at nytimes.com/podcasts or on Apple Podcasts and Spotify. You can also subscribe via your favorite podcast app here https://www.nytimes.com/activate-access/audio?source=podcatcher. For more podcasts and narrated articles, download The New York Times app at nytimes.com/app.

23 Aug 201720min

Tuesday, Aug. 22,  2017

Tuesday, Aug. 22, 2017

Derek Black left the white nationalist movement that he had been poised to help lead, betraying his father, a former grand master of the Ku Klux Klan. Today, we talk with him about the events of the past year. For more information on today’s episode, visit nytimes.com/thedaily. Subscribe today at nytimes.com/podcasts or on Apple Podcasts and Spotify. You can also subscribe via your favorite podcast app here https://www.nytimes.com/activate-access/audio?source=podcatcher. For more podcasts and narrated articles, download The New York Times app at nytimes.com/app.

22 Aug 201734min

Monday, Aug. 21,  2017

Monday, Aug. 21, 2017

Will Stephen K. Bannon use his return to Breitbart News, a right-wing megaphone, to help the president who dismissed him — or to hurt him? And where can he exert more political power: at Breitbart or in the White House? Guest: Jeremy W. Peters, a reporter in the Washington bureau who has covered the so-called alt-right. For more information on today’s episode, visit nytimes.com/thedaily. Subscribe today at nytimes.com/podcasts or on Apple Podcasts and Spotify. You can also subscribe via your favorite podcast app here https://www.nytimes.com/activate-access/audio?source=podcatcher. For more podcasts and narrated articles, download The New York Times app at nytimes.com/app.

21 Aug 201719min

Special Edition: The Fall of Steve Bannon

Special Edition: The Fall of Steve Bannon

After a week in which the president bolstered white nationalists, why did he end it by getting rid of Stephen K. Bannon, the crusader in the White House for the so-called alt-right? Guest: Maggie Haberman, who covers the White House. For more information on today’s episode, visit nytimes.com/thedaily. Subscribe today at nytimes.com/podcasts or on Apple Podcasts and Spotify. You can also subscribe via your favorite podcast app here https://www.nytimes.com/activate-access/audio?source=podcatcher. For more podcasts and narrated articles, download The New York Times app at nytimes.com/app.

18 Aug 201716min

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