How Not to Ruin Your Relationships | Drs. John & Julie Gottman

How Not to Ruin Your Relationships | Drs. John & Julie Gottman

If you care about your long term health and happiness, the quality of your relationships is an area you should focus on. And the good news here is that love – as it applies to friends, family, and romantic partners – is not a factory setting, but instead a skill. Drs. John and Julie Gottman are the perfect guests to talk about how to cultivate good relationships in your life.


World-renowned for his work on marital stability and divorce prediction, Dr. John Gottman has conducted over 40 years of breakthrough research with thousands of couples. He is the co-founder of The Gottman Institute and Affective Software Inc. as well as author of over 200 published academic articles and author or co-author of more than 40 books, including The New York Times bestseller The Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work.


Dr. Julie Gottman is the Co-Founder and President of The Gottman Institute and Co-Founder of Affective Software, Inc. A highly respected clinical psychologist and author, she is sought internationally by media and organizations as an expert advisor on marriage, domestic violence, gay and lesbian adoption, same-sex marriage, and parenting issues. She is the co-creator of the immensely popular The Art and Science of Love weekend workshop for couples and she also co-designed the national clinical training program in Gottman Method Couples Therapy.


This episode explores: how to talk (and listen) to your partner in moments of conflict; what to do before you start trying to solve a problem together; why “there’s no such thing as constructive criticism;” the details of John’s research findings, which have allowed him to predict with stunning accuracy whether a couple will get divorced; how the Gottmans themselves do when it comes to operationalizing their findings/advice; how and why betrayal occurs; when a couple should consider separating; the role mindfulness can play in healthy relationships; and the role of humor in relationships.


Content warning: There are a few mentions of sensitive topics, most notably domestic violence, which Julie discusses for a few minutes towards the end of the interview.


Full Shownotes: https://www.tenpercent.com/podcast-episode/john-julie-gottman-418


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Is It Possible To Improve Your Personality? The Science Says Yes. Here’s How To Do It. | Olga Khazan

Is It Possible To Improve Your Personality? The Science Says Yes. Here’s How To Do It. | Olga Khazan

Plus other intriguing questions answered such as: should you change your personality? What exactly is a personality anyway?   Olga Khazan is a staff writer for The Atlantic. Her new book is called Me, But Better.  In this episode we talk about: The definition of personality  The so-called big 5 aspects of personality and Olga’s attempts to work on them How to spice up your social life  The concept of conscientiousness, and how to get better at it An antidote to procrastination  Tips for reducing neuroticism  The role of psychedelics  Practical ways to make reasonable changes in the midst of a busy life Join Dan’s online community here Follow Dan on social: Instagram, TikTok Subscribe to our YouTube Channel To advertise on the show, contact sales@advertisecast.com or visit https://advertising.libsyn.com/10HappierwithDanHarris

23 Juli 1h 7min

An Antidote to Overwhelm and Anger | Father Gregory Boyle

An Antidote to Overwhelm and Anger | Father Gregory Boyle

The attitude that can help you survive the Trump era.   Gregory Boyle is an American Jesuit priest and the founder of Homeboy Industries in Los Angeles, the largest gang-intervention, rehabilitation, and reentry program in the world. He is the acclaimed author of Tattoos on the Heart, Barking to the Choir, The Whole Language, and most recently, Cherished Belonging.   In this episode we talk about: His unique understanding of God—one that even agnostics can get behind How to build communities that counteract polarization  The practice of affectionate awe  Father Boyle’s antidotes to despair His own daily practice And much more Related Episodes: Can You Really Conquer Hatred Through Love? | Father Gregory Boyle   Join Dan’s online community here Follow Dan on social: Instagram, TikTok Subscribe to our YouTube Channel Additional Resources:  Ordinary Mysticism: Your Life as Sacred Ground   To advertise on the show, contact sales@advertisecast.com or visit https://advertising.libsyn.com/10HappierwithDanHarris.

21 Juli 1h 1min

Am I Meditating Correctly? Am I Doing the Right Kind? | FAQ With Teacher-Of-The-Month Dawn Mauricio

Am I Meditating Correctly? Am I Doing the Right Kind? | FAQ With Teacher-Of-The-Month Dawn Mauricio

A lot of us have questions about our meditation practice, but we may not have anybody to ask. Am I doing it right? Which kind of meditation should I be doing? How do I choose? Today, our Teacher of the Month Dawn Mauricio breaks down some of those questions with some actionable suggestions you can take into your next meditation session. Join Dan’s online community here Follow Dan on social: Instagram, TikTok Subscribe to our YouTube Channel To advertise on the show, contact sales@advertisecast.com or visit https://advertising.libsyn.com/10HappierwithDanHarris

20 Juli 18min

How to Catch Unhelpful Thoughts Before They Take Over with Bhikkhu Bodhi | Staff Picks

How to Catch Unhelpful Thoughts Before They Take Over with Bhikkhu Bodhi | Staff Picks

We’re bringing you some of our favorite gems from the archives, as chosen by our staff. This week, we’re hearing from Buddhist scholar and teacher Bhikkhu Bodhi, as chosen by Tara Anderson, one of our podcast producers. We’re getting a little meta today, as Dan and his guest talk about paying attention to what your own mind is doing. Full Episode:  The Mental States That Steal Your Calm | Bhikkhu Bodhi   Join Dan’s online community here Follow Dan on social: Instagram, TikTok Subscribe to our YouTube Channel   To advertise on the show, contact sales@advertisecast.com or visit https://advertising.libsyn.com/10HappierwithDanHarris

18 Juli 21min

A Buddhist Compass To Direct You Toward Happiness | Beth Upton

A Buddhist Compass To Direct You Toward Happiness | Beth Upton

The happiness recipe from ancient Buddhist psychology. Beth Upton has been teaching meditation since 2014. Before that she spent ten years as a Buddhist nun, five of them in Burma under the guidance of Pa Auk Sayadaw. She currently leads the Sanditthika Meditation Community. In this episode we talk about: The Buddhist Abhidhamma, which Beth calls “particle physics for the mind”   Why she’s interested in the broader teaching of Kusala (happy mind states) Practical ways to design our lives to get more Kusala The beautiful qualities of mind that all co-arise in a moment of Kusala  How we get tripped up in the realm of the “unwholesome” How Beth navigates Kusala and Akusala in her day to day life Related Episodes: The Profound Upsides of Mortality | Nikki Mirghafori, PhD Join Dan’s online community here Follow Dan on social: Instagram, TikTok Subscribe to our YouTube Channel To advertise on the show, contact sales@advertisecast.com or visit https://advertising.libsyn.com/10HappierwithDanHarris

16 Juli 1h 1min

Your Brain Is Suggestible. Here’s How To Turn That to Your Advantage. | Dr. Amir Raz

Your Brain Is Suggestible. Here’s How To Turn That to Your Advantage. | Dr. Amir Raz

Harness the power of suggestion for well-being, pain management, and mental health.   Dr. Amir Raz is a world-renowned expert on the science of suggestion with recent positions as Canada Research Chair, Professor of Psychiatry, Neurology and Neurosurgery, and Psychology at McGill University, and as Founding Director of The Institute for Interdisciplinary Brain and Behavioral Sciences at Chapman University. His most recent book is The Suggestible Brain: The Science and Magic of How We Make Up Our Minds. In this episode we talk about: How Dr. Raz transitioned from a career in magic to neuroscience  The science of suggestibility, how it’s defined, and its relation to hypnosis  Stage  hypnosis vs medical hypnosis How the power of suggestion could be  therapeutically harnessed to impact our physiology, behavior, and well-being Practical exercises for increasing thought control The "magical ingredient" when it comes to dealing with life's challenges Why placebos may work even when you know you’re taking them How we protect ourselves against mis–and–disinformation And much more   Join Dan’s online community here Follow Dan on social: Instagram, TikTok Subscribe to our YouTube Channel To advertise on the show, contact sales@advertisecast.com or visit https://advertising.libsyn.com/10HappierwithDanHarris.

14 Juli 1h 12min

A Circuit Breaker for Stress | Bonus Meditation with Dawn Mauricio

A Circuit Breaker for Stress | Bonus Meditation with Dawn Mauricio

All this month, we’re sharing custom guided meditations from our teacher of the month, Dawn Mauricio, exclusively available at DanHarris.com. Like any good drug dealer, the first taste is free – so today, we’re giving you a sample of what you can expect for the rest of the month. This meditation can be helpful when you’re spiraling and need to interrupt the momentum of chaos.  Related Episodes: How Meditation Can Help You Handle Injured Feelings and Injured Muscles | Dawn Mauricio Join Dan’s online community here Follow Dan on social: Instagram, TikTok Subscribe to our YouTube Channel   To advertise on the show, contact sales@advertisecast.com or visit https://advertising.libsyn.com/10HappierwithDanHarris

13 Juli 11min

How To Stop Spinning Out With Bill Hader | Staff Picks

How To Stop Spinning Out With Bill Hader | Staff Picks

We’re bringing you some of our favorite gems from the archives, as chosen by our staff. This week, we’re hearing from comedian and actor Bill Hader, as chosen by our digital media manager, Hayden Broom. Hader was part of our “Non-Negotiables” series, and he told Dan, with some disappointment, that “the hippies were right.” Full Episode:  Bill Hader on Anxiety, Imposter Syndrome, and Leaning Into Discomfort   Join Dan’s online community here Follow Dan on social: Instagram, TikTok Subscribe to our YouTube Channel To advertise on the show, contact sales@advertisecast.com or visit https://advertising.libsyn.com/10HappierwithDanHarris

11 Juli 23min

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