White People, Drop the Shame and Get Curious | Shelly Graf

White People, Drop the Shame and Get Curious | Shelly Graf

In this episode, we go there. All the way there. All those horrifying little thoughts that white people might have - eg: Have you ever felt superior to, or suspicious of, black people? - let's drag them out of the subconscious and look at them. We don't need to submerge them or swat them away. But here's the thing: can we do it with some semblance of mindfulness and even friendliness? This isn't an exercise in ritual shaming; guilt and shame are just self-centeredness cul-de-sacs. After all, we didn't summon these thoughts; they were injected into us by the culture. So fellow white people, instead of just looking at the race discussion as something supremely discomfiting, let's also look at it as an opportunity to do what we've been attempting to do in meditation all along: to know our minds better so that we don't blindly act out all of our conditioning. Our guest this week is the magnificent Shelly Graf. Shelly was recommended to me by my TPH colleague, Matthew Hepburn. Shelly is a social worker and a staff dharma teacher at the Common Ground Meditation Center in Minneapolis. To be clear, Shelly doesn't pretend to be an expert who has it all figured out - simply a meditation teacher who has committed to deeply engaging on the issue of race. So in that spirit, here we go: Shelly Graf. Where to find Shelly Graf online: Website: https://commongroundmeditation.org/ STwitter: https://twitter.com/cgmed Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/CommonGroundMeditation/ Check our our new, free collection of meditations called Relating to Race in the Ten Percent Happier app: https://10percenthappier.app.link/RelatingToRace Other Resources Mentioned: Refuge (Buddhism) - https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Refuge_(Buddhism) Karma in Buddhism - https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Karma_in_Buddhism Maitr? - https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Maitr%C4%AB Ruth King - https://ruthking.net/ Episode 164: Ruth King, Being Mindful of Race - https://open.spotify.com/episode/5p3BTgqKgke7PYSUbzvPrR Three Marks of Existence: Anicca, Dukkha, Anatta - https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Three_marks_of_existence M?na - https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/M%C4%81na Common Ground Meditation Center - https://commongroundmeditation.org/ The Characteristics of White Supremacy Culture - https://www.showingupforracialjustice.org/white-supremacy-culture-characteristics.html Detour-Spotting for White Anti-Racists - https://www.racialequitytools.org/resourcefiles/olson.pdf List of resources from Resmaa Menakem - https://www.resmaa.com/resources Racial Affinity Group Development Program - https://ruthking.net/learning-with-ruth/ra-gdp/ Additional Resources: Ten Percent Happier Live: https://tenpercent.com/live Coronavirus Sanity Guide: https://www.tenpercent.com/coronavirussanityguide Free App access for Health Care Workers: https://tenpercent.com/care Full Shownotes: https://www.tenpercent.com/podcast-episode/shelly-graf-256

Avsnitt(938)

Feeling Stuck? Dull? Flat? Here's a Better Path to the "Good Life." | Shigehiro Oishi

Feeling Stuck? Dull? Flat? Here's a Better Path to the "Good Life." | Shigehiro Oishi

An often overlooked secret, from a U. Chicago happiness expert. Shigehiro Oishi is the Marshall Field IV Professor of Psychology at the University of Chicago. He is one of the foremost authorities on happiness, meaning, and culture. His newest book is Life in Three Dimensions: How Curiosity, Exploration, and Experience Make a Fuller, Better Life. In this episode we talk about: How our obsession with productivity is flattening and dulling our lives The definitions of both happiness and meaning—both of which have, until now, been considered the main paths to a good life The potential downsides of pursuing happiness and meaning Shige introduces his third path to a good life—psychological richness Skills for developing psychological richness Tools for becoming more playful he difficult balance between detachment and healthy ambition How to reframe adverse experiences Re-storying tools for reframing the "hard shit" in our lives And much more Join Dan's online community here Follow Dan on social: Instagram, TikTok Subscribe to our YouTube Channel Tickets are now on sale for a special live taping of the 10% Happier Podcast with guest Pete Holmes! Join us on November 18th in NYC for this benefit show, with all proceeds supporting the New York Insight Meditation Center. Grab your tickets here! Tickets are now available for an intimate live event with Dan on November 23rd as part of the Troutbeck Luminary Series. Join the conversation, participate in a guided meditation, and ask your questions during the Q&A. Click here to buy your ticket! To advertise on the show, contact sales@advertisecast.com or visit https://advertising.libsyn.com/10HappierwithDanHarris Thanks to our sponsor: AT&T: Staying connected matters. That's why AT&T has connectivity you can depend on, or they will proactively make it right. Visit att.com/guarantee for details.

27 Okt 1h 10min

How To Communicate Effectively With Other Human Beings

How To Communicate Effectively With Other Human Beings

Sharing an episode featuring Dan from a podcast we love, Think Fast, Talk Smart. Whether presenting to millions on live television or talking to just one person, Dan Harris knows that the quality of every interaction depends on the presence you bring to it. Harris is a former national news anchor for ABC News and is now the host of the 10% Happier podcast and author of 10% Happier and Meditation for Fidgety Skeptics. As he knows from experience, there's power in "Waking up to something fundamental, that the mind is out of control, and you don't want to be owned by it." How do we break the pattern of being controlled by our thoughts? Mindfulness and self-awareness, he says, put "distance" between us and our "thoughts and urges and emotions," enabling us to connect with ourselves and others with greater consciousness and clarity. In this episode of Think Fast, Talk Smart, Harris and host Matt Abrahams discuss how mindfulness can transform our communication, sharing strategies for deeper listening, responding versus reacting, and reflecting what others say back to them. "Relationships are the most important aspect of your happiness," Harris says. "The quality of those connections goes up when you're less stuck in your own head." Episode References: Dan Harris: https://www.fastersmarter.io/guests/dan-harris/ Dan's Books: http://fastersmarter.io/10-percent-happier https://fastersmarter.io/meditation-for-fidgety-skeptics https://www.fastersmarter.io/179-communication-happiness-wellbeing-finding-positive-in-negative-emotions/ https://www.fastersmarter.io/180-unlocking-your-future-self-communication-happiness-wellbeing/ https://www.fastersmarter.io/181-why-happiness-is-a-direction-not-a-destination-communication-happiness-wellbeing/ https://www.fastersmarter.io/182-stop-chasing-time-and-start-owning-it-communication-happiness-wellbeing/ Tickets are now on sale for a special live taping of the 10% Happier Podcast with guest Pete Holmes! Join us on November 18th in NYC for this benefit show, with all proceeds supporting the New York Insight Meditation Center. Grab your tickets here! Tickets are now available for an intimate live event with Dan on November 23rd as part of the Troutbeck Luminary Series. Join the conversation, participate in a guided meditation, and ask your questions during the Q&A. Click here to buy your ticket! Join Dan's online community here Follow Dan on social: Instagram, TikTok Subscribe to our YouTube Channel To advertise on the show, contact sales@advertisecast.com or visit https://advertising.libsyn.com/10HappierwithDanHarris

26 Okt 25min

Do You Feel Like Everybody Sucks? Here's a 10-Minute Pain Reliever.

Do You Feel Like Everybody Sucks? Here's a 10-Minute Pain Reliever.

If the idea of "sending love to all beings" makes you roll your eyes, this episode is for you. Dan leads a guided meditation, suitable for all levels of experience. Originally recorded during one of our live sangha gatherings on Substack, which are open to paid subscribers at DanHarris.com. Tickets are now on sale for a special live taping of the 10% Happier Podcast with guest Pete Holmes! Join us on November 18th in NYC for this benefit show, with all proceeds supporting the New York Insight Meditation Center. Grab your tickets here! Tickets are now available for an intimate live event with Dan on November 23rd as part of the Troutbeck Luminary Series. Join the conversation, participate in a guided meditation, and ask your questions during the Q&A. Click here to buy your ticket! Join Dan's online community here Follow Dan on social: Instagram, TikTok Subscribe to our YouTube Channel To advertise on the show, contact sales@advertisecast.com or visit https://advertising.libsyn.com/10HappierwithDanHarris Thanks to today's sponsor:  BetterHelp: If you're ready to find the right therapist for you, BetterHelp can help you start that journey. Our listeners get 10% off their first month at betterhelp.com/Happier.

24 Okt 12min

How To Perform Under Pressure—With Both Peace and Confidence | Jim Murphy

How To Perform Under Pressure—With Both Peace and Confidence | Jim Murphy

A performance coach and bestselling author shares practical tools for thriving in crisis, shaving down the ego, and designing the life you want. #1 New York Times bestselling author Jim Murphy is a Performance Coach to some of the best athletes and leaders in the world. In addition to coaching professional athletes and executives, Murphy is the president of the Inner Excellence Freedom Project whose mission is to build communities to alleviate spiritual and physical poverty around the world. In this episode we talk about: A counterintuitive secret to performing under pressure How to "relanguage" the story you tell about yourself A crucial life question that everyone should be asking themselves Practical tools for "inner excellence" Jim's Four Daily Goals Cultivating non-attachment to results How to be less afraid of fear The "expect nothing" rule And the role of faith in his life Join Dan's online community here Follow Dan on social: Instagram, TikTok Subscribe to our YouTube Channel Get ready for another Meditation Party at Omega Institute! This in-person workshop brings together Dan with his friends and meditation teachers, Sebene Selassie, Jeff Warren, and for the first time, Ofosu Jones-Quartey. The event runs October 24th-26th. Sign up and learn more here! Tickets are now on sale for a special live taping of the 10% Happier Podcast with guest Pete Holmes! Join us on November 18th in NYC for this benefit show, with all proceeds supporting the New York Insight Meditation Center. Grab your tickets here! To advertise on the show, contact sales@advertisecast.com or visit https://advertising.libsyn.com/10HappierwithDanHarris Thanks to our sponsors: AT&T: Staying connected matters. That's why AT&T has connectivity you can depend on, or they will proactively make it right. Visit att.com/guarantee for details. Function: Our first 1000 listeners get a $100 credit toward their membership. Visit www.functionhealth.com/Happier or use the gift code Happier100 at signup to own your health. Fabletics:  Treat yourself to gear that looks good, feels good, and doesn't break the bank. Go to fabletics.com/Happier, sign up as a VIP and get 80% off everything.

22 Okt 1h 20min

The Science Of Getting Out Of Your Head | Annie Murphy Paul

The Science Of Getting Out Of Your Head | Annie Murphy Paul

An acclaimed science writer on how to upgrade your mind by using more than your head. Annie Murphy Paul is a science writer and TED speaker. Her latest book is The Extended Mind: The Power of Thinking Outside the Brain. In this episode we talk about: Why upgrading your mind involves more than just using your head. How our bodies, surroundings, and relationships all have the power to enhance our thinking. Practical strategies for "thinking with the body," including interoception, the role of intuition, movement breaks, and even fidgeting. The importance of gesture and movement—why sitting perfectly still actually makes thinking harder for many of us. Tips for "thinking with your surroundings"—from stepping outdoors to using evocative objects and whiteboards to organize your ideas. The social side of thinking: how to learn from experts, think with peers, and harness the intelligence of groups. The challenges—and potential—of group collaboration, avoiding the pitfalls of groupthink, and fostering what psychologists call "groupiness." The concept of "extension inequality": why access to the resources that enhance thinking—like nature, movement, and mentorship—is not distributed equally, and why that matters. And finally, why returning to the way kids learn—using hands, bodies, play, and connection—might actually be good for all of us. Join Dan's online community here Follow Dan on social: Instagram, TikTok Subscribe to our YouTube Channel Get ready for another Meditation Party at Omega Institute! This in-person workshop brings together Dan with his friends and meditation teachers, Sebene Selassie, Jeff Warren, and for the first time, Ofosu Jones-Quartey. The event runs October 24th-26th. Sign up and learn more here! Tickets are now on sale for a special live taping of the 10% Happier Podcast with guest Pete Holmes! Join us on November 18th in NYC for this benefit show, with all proceeds supporting the New York Insight Meditation Center. Grab your tickets here! To advertise on the show, contact sales@advertisecast.com or visit https://advertising.libsyn.com/10HappierwithDanHarris.

20 Okt 59min

How Can I Meditate (Or Do Anything Else) When I'm in Pain? | Sebene Selassie

How Can I Meditate (Or Do Anything Else) When I'm in Pain? | Sebene Selassie

A longtime cancer survivor — and our Teacher of the Month — has some suggestions for working with pain. Join Dan's online community here Follow Dan on social: Instagram, TikTok Subscribe to our YouTube Channel Get ready for another Meditation Party at Omega Institute! This in-person workshop brings together Dan with his friends and meditation teachers, Sebene Selassie, Jeff Warren, and for the first time, Ofosu Jones-Quartey. The event runs October 24th-26th. Sign up and learn more at eomega.org/workshops/meditation-party-2025. Tickets are now on sale for a special live taping of the 10% Happier Podcast with guest Pete Holmes! Join us on November 18th in NYC for this benefit show, with all proceeds supporting the New York Insight Meditation Center. Grab your tickets here! To advertise on the show, contact sales@advertisecast.com or visit https://advertising.libsyn.com/10HappierwithDanHarris Thanks to our sponsor: Airbnb: Your home might be worth more than you think. Find out how much at airbnb.com/host.

19 Okt 23min

Telling Harsh Stories to Yourself About Yourself? How To Rewrite the Narrative. | Allison Sweet Grant

Telling Harsh Stories to Yourself About Yourself? How To Rewrite the Narrative. | Allison Sweet Grant

Nobody makes it out of childhood unscathed. Here's a guide to letting go of the past. Allison Sweet Grant, graduate with dual master's degrees from the University of Michigan, is a psychiatric nurse practitioner, turned author. She has been published in The New York Times and The Atlantic. She is the author of two children's picture books, The Gift Inside the Box and Leif and the Fall, co-authored with her husband Adam Grant. I Am the Cage is her debut novel. In this episode we talk about: The impact of your childhood trauma on your adult relationships The concept of the "junk drawer" (a metaphor for all the pain, self-doubt, and anxiety you might try to compartmentalize) Writing as a tool for self-acceptance and self-compassion How to re-write your own story and where to start Practical meditation tools to quiet the mind The role of cathartic visualization Dealing with imposter syndrome And more Join Dan's online community here Follow Dan on social: Instagram, TikTok Subscribe to our YouTube Channel Get ready for another Meditation Party at Omega Institute! This in-person workshop brings together Dan with his friends and meditation teachers, Sebene Selassie, Jeff Warren, and for the first time, Ofosu Jones-Quartey. The event runs October 24th-26th. Sign up and learn more here! Tickets are now on sale for a special live taping of the 10% Happier Podcast with guest Pete Holmes! Join us on November 18th in NYC for this benefit show, with all proceeds supporting the New York Insight Meditation Center. Grab your tickets here! To advertise on the show, contact sales@advertisecast.com or visit https://advertising.libsyn.com/10HappierwithDanHarris. Thanks to our sponsors: Bumble: Thinking about dating again? Take this as your sign and start your love story on Bumble. Airbnb: Your home might be worth more than you think. Find out how much at airbnb.com/host.

17 Okt 46min

Is There Such a Thing as Healthy Shame and Embarrassment? | JoAnna Hardy

Is There Such a Thing as Healthy Shame and Embarrassment? | JoAnna Hardy

A Buddhist recipe for speaking, working, and living in a way that will make you happy. JoAnna Hardy has practiced in multiple traditions since 1999. She is currently a meditation trainer at Apple Fitness+, a visiting teacher at Black Being LA, a visiting retreat teacher at Insight Meditation Society, and about to embark on a new mystery journey! In this episode we talk about: Sila, the Buddhist code of ethics Concepts such as right livelihood and right speech Why we lie The power of Buddhist tattoos Hiri and Otappa (AKA healthy shame and healthy embarrassment) Related Episodes: How to Speak Clearly, Calmly, and Without Alienating People | Dan Clurman and Mudita Nisker Oren Jay Sofer, Practicing Mindful Communication The Buddha's 8-Part Manual for a Good Life | Brother Pháp Dung The Surprising Power of "Healthy Embarrassment" | Koshin Paley Ellison The Selfish Case for Being Ethical | Eugene Cash Join Dan's online community here Follow Dan on social: Instagram, TikTok Subscribe to our YouTube Channel Get ready for another Meditation Party at Omega Institute! This in-person workshop brings together Dan with his friends and meditation teachers, Sebene Selassie, Jeff Warren, and for the first time, Ofosu Jones-Quartey. The event runs October 24th-26th. Sign up and learn more here! Tickets are now on sale for a special live taping of the 10% Happier Podcast with guest Pete Holmes! Join us on November 18th in NYC for this benefit show, with all proceeds supporting the New York Insight Meditation Center. Grab your tickets here! To advertise on the show, contact sales@advertisecast.com or visit https://advertising.libsyn.com/10HappierwithDanHarris Thanks to our sponsors: Airbnb: Your home might be worth more than you think. Find out how much at airbnb.com/host. AT&T: Staying connected matters. That's why AT&T has connectivity you can depend on, or they will proactively make it right. Visit att.com/guarantee for details. Function: Our first 1000 listeners get a $100 credit toward their membership. Visit www.functionhealth.com/Happier or use the gift code Happier100 at signup to own your health.

15 Okt 1h 17min

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