Why Every Man Needs a “Why”: Loneliness, Leaving, and Becoming the Author of Your Life with Dr. Cody Young
13 Minutes30 Okt

Why Every Man Needs a “Why”: Loneliness, Leaving, and Becoming the Author of Your Life with Dr. Cody Young

Every 13 minutes in America, a man dies by suicide. Dr. Baruch’s mission is simple and audacious—push that number back to 14. In this intimate conversation, Dr. Cody Young shares a raw journey through a school shooting that impacted his family, the loneliness many men quietly carry, and the seismic life shift of leaving his lifelong faith. Together, Baruch and Cody explore moving from “Mr. Nice Guy” to a good man—taking radical responsibility, building real brotherhood, and claiming authorship over your life.

Key Topics Covered:

  • The 13-minute mission: reframing men’s mental health with a concrete goal.

  • Evergreen High School shooting: a father’s helplessness, a community’s response, and unseen trauma after crisis.

  • The loneliness epidemic in men: why having “people around” isn’t the same as having community.

  • Faith transition & excommunication: cost of leaving a high-control community, grief, and rebuilding belonging.

  • From “nice” to “good”: the moral courage to take a stand—even when it creates conflict.

  • Shadow work & humility: moving from being a knower to a seeker; questioning, integrating, and growing.

  • Radical responsibility: becoming the author of your life (and why authority starts with authorship).

  • Men’s groups that go deep: beyond sports and weather—practicing vulnerability, service, and accountability.

  • Parenting after trauma: noticing the hidden aftershocks and supporting healing over time.

Timestamp Takeaways:

  • 0:05 — The rebrand: why “13 Minutes” and the goal to push it to 14.

  • 0:56 — What a 1-minute shift would mean: 2,888 men choosing life this year.

  • 1:22 — Evergreen, CO school shooting: Cody’s daughter barricaded; parents’ helplessness.

  • 4:06 — Injury update and outcome; the shooter’s death by suicide.

  • 6:17 — School & community response: resources, care, and the “after” of trauma.

  • 7:54 — The bridge to men’s work: loneliness as a common denominator.

  • 10:15 — Origin story: growing up LDS (Mormon), marriage, and a faith built into identity.

  • 12:28 — Leaving the church: losing community, starting a support group, and backlash.

  • 14:50 — Formal excommunication: recording and publishing the proceedings—and why.

  • 18:03 — From “nice guy” to good man: taking a stand even when it isn’t “nice.”

  • 20:07 — The turning point question: “If it isn’t true, would you want to know?”

  • 22:42 — Applying scientific thinking to faith; following data and intuition out of certainty.

  • 26:02 — Early cracks: polygamy, Book of Mormon anachronisms, and cognitive dissonance.

  • 31:02 — Family ties & eternity narratives: how excommunication reframes relationships.

  • 35:11 — Moving to Colorado: rebuilding friendship muscles without a ready-made community.

  • 37:00 — Why men’s groups (MKP, etc.) matter: depth, service, and real talk.

  • 38:59 — Image management vs. vulnerability: why depth was missing before.

  • 44:49 — “Circle the wagons”: insulation, persecution narratives, and not Googling the hard questions.

  • 46:05 — Becoming a seeker: humility, curiosity, learning across traditions.

  • 48:53Radical ownership: accountability without outsourcing to leaders or dogma.

  • 51:30 — Fatherhood after crisis: standing steady at the center so the family can orbit.

Guest Links — Dr. Cody Young

Men don’t need more answers—they need a reason, a brotherhood, and the courage to author their lives.

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