Would You Lick a Toilet? | Exposures, Experiments, & The Emetophobia Trap with CBT Therapist David Kaneria Ep. 22

Why can trying SO hard to feel safe actually keep emetophobia alive?

This week, we're joined by CBT therapist and emetophobia specialist David Kaneria for a deep dive into what keeps the fear cycle going—and what recovery can actually look like.

David gives us a particularly interesting perspective because he treats emetophobia but has never experienced the phobia himself. We ask him what nausea and vomiting feel like to someone who isn't afraid of them, why emetophobia can feel so different from other phobias, and what he sees again and again in the people he treats.

We talk about safety behaviors and David's brilliant “barking at the postman” analogy: when we do something to prevent the thing we're afraid of and then nothing bad happens, our brains can mistakenly learn, “Good thing I did that!” instead of learning that maybe the safety behavior wasn't protecting us in the first place.

We also dig into exposure therapy vs. behavioral experiments, why exposure sometimes feels like it “didn't work,” nausea and anxiety, acceptance and willingness, OCD vs. emetophobia, setbacks after actually getting sick, and the dreaded thought: “Okay, maybe I was fine all those other times…but what about THIS time?”

David also answers some of the questions we hear constantly: Why is nighttime so hard? What if I stop my safety behaviors and get sick? How do I know if something IS a safety behavior? What if I can't afford therapy? And should someone with emetophobia ever intentionally make themselves throw up as an exposure?

Then we obviously make things weird with some emetophobia Would You Rathers involving toilet seats, handrails, sketchy food, public embarrassment, and strangers throwing up on you. 😂

David's final message is one we hope you'll remember:

Emetophobia is treatable. Keep trying.

The goal isn't to learn that you need to be safe.

It's to learn that you can handle it.