244 SelfWork: Why We Lie (Even In Therapy)

244 SelfWork: Why We Lie (Even In Therapy)

Today we're going to focus on why we lie to each other, to ourselves and even in therapy. We'll touch on severe manipulative lying, called pathological lying, and compulsive lying, but most of the episode we'll discuss plain old lying. I found two wonderful articles on the subject and their links are below. Hopefully understanding the "why" might help you realize that there are other things you could do... and I, as always, suggest what you can do about it.

The listener voicemail for today is from someone who read my blogpost on enmeshment and is looking for some answers. Those of who had cruel or neglectful parents might not at all understand at this man’s plight, He was loved too much??? But whether or not the boundaries of parenting were nonexistent because you got manipulated through abuse, or whether they were nonexistent because you weren’t allowed or supported in building a life away from a parent, the damage can exist either way.

So, in this episode sponsored by Athletic Greens, let’s look at lying and what its function may be – even in therapy.

Important Links:

Click Here for the fabulous offer from Athletic Greens with bonus product with your subscription!

Time Magazine's article on the functions of lying

Article by Dr. Robyn Koslowitz in Psychology Today on lying in therapy

You can hear more about depression and many other topics by listening to Dr. Margaret’s podcast, SelfWork with Dr. Margaret Rutherford. Subscribe to this website and receive her weekly blog posts and podcasts!

If you’d like to join my FaceBook closed group, then click here and answer the membership questions! Welcome!

My book entitled Perfectly Hidden Depression is available! And you can order here! Its message is specifically for those with a struggle with strong perfectionism which acts to mask underlying emotional pain. But the many self-help techniques described can be used by everyone who chooses to begin to address emotions long hidden away that are clouding and sabotaging your current life.

And there’s another way to send me a message! You can record by clicking below and ask your question or make a comment. You’ll have 90 seconds to do so and that time goes quickly. By recording, you’re giving SelfWork (and me) permission to use your voice on the podcast. I’ll look forward to hearing from you!

Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brands

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520 SelfWork: The Exhilarating Messiness of Grief

520 SelfWork: The Exhilarating Messiness of Grief

Today’s episode of SelfWork was suggested by the last episode of Ted Lasso, in which Rebecca talked about grief and the messy feelings it can bring with it. Rebecca tells Ted, "We laugh, we hurt, we ...

16 Loka 21min

519 SelfWork: Daring to Face the Fear of Public Speaking (And Other Anxieties)

519 SelfWork: Daring to Face the Fear of Public Speaking (And Other Anxieties)

Dr. Margaret and her TEDx speech coach, Brian Miller, talk about challenging the fear of public speaking and the importance of human connection. "Go out and make a dent in the universe." These are th...

9 Loka 41min

518 SelfWork: How To Use Your Innate Intuition to Heal and Grow

518 SelfWork: How To Use Your Innate Intuition to Heal and Grow

Today we're talking with two experts on tuning into your own intuition. Sarah Gregg is a psychologist and a published author with over 90,000 copies of her books sold. And Jill Ritchie is a highly so...

2 Loka 38min

517 SelfWork: Challenging Your Fear and The Underlying Assumptions That Keep It Alive

517 SelfWork: Challenging Your Fear and The Underlying Assumptions That Keep It Alive

There’s a word for intense fear of change. Metathesiophobia. That’s when your fear of change is so strong and affects your life so intensely that you’ve developed an actual phobia around change. If t...

25 Syys 22min

516 SelfWork: Panicked About Panic: 5 Surefire Ways to Calm Your Nervous System

516 SelfWork: Panicked About Panic: 5 Surefire Ways to Calm Your Nervous System

Having a panic disorder is bad enough. You may be able to anticipate it happening; for example, if you tend to panic when you see a spider or a snake. But other times, panic attacks – the sudden ons...

18 Syys 24min

515 SelfWork: Enhance Your Skills: Listening Someone Into Existence with Doug Noll

515 SelfWork: Enhance Your Skills: Listening Someone Into Existence with Doug Noll

Today we'll focus on how to listen to someone so that they feel truly understood and seen. And it may not be a kind of listening that you know about. It's a method called "affect labeling" - meaning ...

11 Syys 35min

514 SelfWork: Three Essential Questions to Identify Your Role Model

514 SelfWork: Three Essential Questions to Identify Your Role Model

Today I'm focusing on three role models in my own life and the questions you can ask to help you identify your own. Dolly Parton. Maya Angelou. And a woman named "Snooky." Advertising Inquiries: ht...

4 Syys 23min

513 SelfWork: Inside A Psych Ward: A New Book by JaKob Williams, Chock Full of Nuts

513 SelfWork: Inside A Psych Ward: A New Book by JaKob Williams, Chock Full of Nuts

You may never have been on the inside of a psych ward. In his new book, JaKob Williams takes you there. Or at least, he takes you to his version of a residential psych ward. He's an interesting guy....

28 Elo 42min

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