EP#101: How to Make it Safe for Men to Have Vulnerable Conversations with Shana James

Shana James is a coach, author, and podcaster who has been working with men for the past 20 years.

Shana shares her experiences and insights on creating safe spaces for men to have vulnerable conversations, feel their feelings, and work through their problems.

She discusses her shift in perspective on men and emphasizes the importance of looking “underneath the surface” and assuming the best in men.

Want more from your man? Shana also provides practical advice on how women can create safe spaces for men to open up and explores the importance of open communication in relationships

The underbelly of men [00:00:52]

Shana shares her experiences of working with men and seeing their vulnerability and desire for connection.

Seeing men differently [00:01:58]

Shana discusses why she sees men differently and how her perspective allows her to have positive experiences with men.

Experiencing vulnerability in men [00:04:47]

Shana talks about an exercise where men express their emotions and she witnesses their deep longing for love and connection.

The importance of holding space for men [00:09:00]

Women often aren't taught how to hold space for men, and men are taught not to express. Creating safe spaces for vulnerable conversations.

Building safety and intimacy in relationships [00:10:59]

When women feel empowered and don't need a man to be a certain way for them to feel good about themselves, relationships become stronger and more loving.

Advice on holding space for men [00:12:09]

A practice for women to hold space for their partners by asking open-ended questions and creating a safe environment for vulnerability and emotional expression.

The importance of vulnerable conversations [00:19:06]

Discussion on the significance of having open and honest conversations about desires and fears in a relationship.

Creating a safe space for communication [00:20:00]

Exploration of the need for non-judgmental and compassionate communication to foster a safe environment for sharing.

Venting and making requests [00:21:22]

Advice on the importance of conscious venting and transitioning into making requests to empower oneself and improve the relationship dynamic.

The importance of conscious connection in relationships [00:29:30]

Discussion on how most people struggle with vulnerability and checking in with their partner's needs.

The power of presence in a relationship [00:30:14]

Sharing a personal experience of feeling more connected and present with a partner during a dinner date.

Encouraging appreciation and support in relationships [00:31:27]

Exploring how expressing gratitude and appreciation can encourage more positive behavior in a partner.

Follow Shana James:

https://shanajamescoaching.com/about-shana-james/

https://www.instagram.com/shanajames/

https://linktr.ee/shanajamescoaching

Follow Jen:

https://www.instagram.com/theopenbedroompodcast/

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