2 Bears, 1 Happy Ending w/ Stavros Halkias & Chris Distefano | 2 Bears, 1 Cave

2 Bears, 1 Happy Ending w/ Stavros Halkias & Chris Distefano | 2 Bears, 1 Cave

SPONSORS: - Upgrade your wardrobe and save on @trueclassic at https://trueclassic.com/BEARS! #trueclassicpod - For simple, online access to personalized and affordable care for Hair Loss, ED, Weight Loss, and more, visit https://Hims.com/BEARS The Summer Bears are back and Chris Distefano and Stavros Halkias are fully locked into their takeover of 2 Bears 1 Cave. With Stav in a floral shirt and Chris squeezed into a Darryl Strawberry jersey, the two dive headfirst into tales of the wild ‘86 Mets, Kevin Spacey offering unsolicited shoulder rubs, and the horrifying science of ALS—because what’s funnier than degenerative nerve disease? Stavvy also gets a massage from Chrissy, we learn about Lenny Dykstra's podcast rates, and the guys debate polyamory, prostitutes, and just how many years Bert Kreischer has left. Speaking of Bert, he sends the guys a morbid video asking them to predict which comedian friends are not long for this world. Plus, Stav makes a strong case for becoming a Japanese-style husband, Chris recounts a near-affair that lasted 12 seconds on the LIRR, and together they fantasize about future threesomes with suspiciously supportive fans. Is it a good episode? No. Is it packed with fake current events, conspiracy theories, open marriages, and physical touch? You bet your bottom dollar it is. 2 Bears, 1 Cave Ep. 301 https://tomsegura.com/tour https://www.bertbertbert.com/tour https://store.ymhstudios.com Chapters 00:00:00 - Intro 00:01:42 - Baseball Greats, Kevin Spacey, & ALS 00:10:31 - Reading Fan Comments 00:27:20 - Swingers, Cucks, & Flirty Fans 00:36:33 - Montreal Screwjobs & Polyamory Shenanigans 00:44:58 - Trisha Paytas Baby Theory 00:51:34 - Comedian Death Pool 01:00:49 - Chrissy Massages Stavvy 01:07:23 - Wrap Up Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

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Ep. 23 | 2 Bears 1 Cave w/ Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer

Ep. 23 | 2 Bears 1 Cave w/ Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer

The 2 Bears are back in the Cave this week for ANOTHER extra episode to help you stay safe at home! First, remember to check out Bert Kreischer's special "Hey Big Boy" and Tom Segura's special "Ball Hog" on Netflix now! The bears start off with sharing a drinking game someone made on Bert's podcast habbits called "Bertus Interruptus." Can you survive it? Then Tom shares his story behind his new "Wash Your Hands" merch and the story of contacting the widow of the famed "Wood" who most of you have seen via text messages. Bert talks about his recent trip to the dentist and how much of an emergency his root canal was. He was sleeping with RAW ONIONS in his mouth! All new teeth for Berty Boy? Then Tom and Bert trade stories about getting fired (which makes Bert LOSE CONTROL) , sleeping around in their early days, and how good Bert is at listening/acting. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

30 Maalis 20201h 38min

Ep. 22 | 2 Bears 1 Cave w/ Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer

Ep. 22 | 2 Bears 1 Cave w/ Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer

It's wild times, but the bears are back together in the cave! This time to celebrate Tom Segura's new Netflix special "Ball Hog!" With the current state of the world, Tom had to cancel all of the press he was going to do to promote it, so his best friend/bear Bert Kreischer steps in to try and recreate all the different interviews he would have had to do! What would Stephen Colbert have asked? What about Jimmy Fallon? Bert also gets into a fun story or two about beefing with black twitter over a hashtag, and how Desus and Miro were involved. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

23 Maalis 20201h 24min

Ep. 21 | 2 Bears 1 Cave w/ Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer

Ep. 21 | 2 Bears 1 Cave w/ Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer

The two bears, Tom Segura and Bert Kreischer, reunite in the cave today to celebrate Bert's new Stand-Up Netflix special "Hey Big Boy" that becomes available to watch on Netflix March 17, 2020 on St. Patrick's Day! We first get into seeing exactly how much worse Bert looks now from when he taped his special (3-ish months apart). It's WILD. We get into both tom and Bert doing press for their upcoming specials (Tom's "Ball Hog" comes out March 24, 2020). They discuss writing material, how great Andrew Schulz's way of making content is, strip club stories, Ian Bagg stories, and a cool video where some guy found a baby CRAWLING ON THE HIGHWAY. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

16 Maalis 20201h 30min

Ep. 20 | 2 Bears 1 Cave w/ Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer

Ep. 20 | 2 Bears 1 Cave w/ Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer

On this episode of 2 Bears, 1 Cave Tom Segura surprises Bert Kreischer by having the Stanley Cup brought into the studio and they learn about its history together! The two of them also revisit the idea of becoming dandies. The question "what is the youngest age you would date" is also explored. What's the youngest you would go? Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

2 Maalis 20201h 38min

Ep. 19 | 2 Bears 1 Cave w/ Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer

Ep. 19 | 2 Bears 1 Cave w/ Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer

The 2 Bears, Tom Segura and Bert Kreischer are back in their 1 Cave today. Bert just got off the road, how is he doing? Tom and Bert are starting to realize they have no hobbies, so they start to entertain the idea of starting one. Will Bert become a Dandy? Will Bert buy a car on the podcast? These are all hobbies discussed. Plus, Tom and Bert look into joining a secret society. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

17 Helmi 20201h 48min

Ep. 18 | 2 Bears 1 Cave w/ Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer

Ep. 18 | 2 Bears 1 Cave w/ Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer

The 2 Bears, Tom Segura and Bert Kreischer are back in their 1 Cave! First we must discuss, what could be breaking news: Bert had a heart attack last night?! TMZ is trying to confirm! Then, Tom and Bert discuss the Ari Shaffir tweet about Kobe Bryant. Then we get on to the Super Bowl half time show! Jennifer Lopez and Shakira look absolutely incredible! Which one would you rather fill up?? LeeAnn got a text about Caronavirus from Christina that she forwarded to half her phone book and kids. Always check the link before forwarding to other people! Bert celebrates Chinese New Year and we get more impressions from Bert. Tom and Bert then debate the pros and cons of early morning drinking before flights. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

3 Helmi 20201h 32min

Ep. 17 | 2 Bears 1 Cave w/ Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer

Ep. 17 | 2 Bears 1 Cave w/ Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer

In this episode of 2 Bears, 1 Cave, Tom Segura and Bert Kreischer discuss things they learned from their fathers, their feelings about over emotional people, and their new weight loss challenge. Tom also shares a cool story about about a guy who was not nice to his mom. What did YOU learn from your dad? Who do YOU think will win this weight loss challenge? Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

20 Tammi 20201h 29min

Ep. 16 | 2 Bears 1 Cave w/ Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer

Ep. 16 | 2 Bears 1 Cave w/ Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer

What do the 2 Bears get up to in the cave this week? First, Tom and Bert show off hats that they're not sure if they can sell or not, but if guys like them, we'll figure something out! Then we get on the subject of Tom's new found love for speaking Spanish on podcasts! Is it all a rouse? What's the ACTUAL reason? Bert has some ideas! Bert then tells us about his spiritual healer. They also discuss their love of 50 Cent and how incredibly funny he is. Bert then starts to make some interesting observations: he thinks Christina P is the mastermind behind all the Bert-shaming that's been going on for years! is it true? Let us know in the comments! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

6 Tammi 20201h 10min

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