Self-Compassion Ain't Always Soft | Kristin Neff

Self-Compassion Ain't Always Soft | Kristin Neff

There's a widely held assumption that if you have a warmer, friendlier relationship with yourself, you will not only slack off and be ineffective, but also that you will be a doormat. My guest today says: not true. She's making the case that self-compassion, when properly understood, can lead to a kind of ferocity. It can help you stand up for yourself and others. Kristin Neff is the central pioneer in the field of self-compassion research and her work has had a massive impact on me and my own work. She is an Associate Professor of Educational Psychology at the University of Texas at Austin. She's the author of the book Self-Compassion: The Proven Power of Being Kind to Yourself, and now she has a new book, called Fierce Self-Compassion: How Women Can Harness Kindness to Speak Up, Claim Their Power and Thrive. This conversation is for everyone, whether you identify as a woman or not. These concepts are universal, although, as you will hear Kristen argue, there is special importance for women. And speaking of gender, we are dedicating this week to that subject. Coming up on Wednesday, we're going to talk about masculinity with a guest named Daniel Ellenberg. In this episode with Kristin Neff, we talk about: tender self-compassion vs. fierce self-compassion; the three main forms of fierce self-compassion; how to take a fierce self-compassion break; destructive vs. constructive anger; why she wrote the book specifically for women, and why you should read it, regardless of your gender socialization; how men can help the women in their lives develop this kind of ferocity; and how self-compassion can help us face our biases. For more resources on self-compassion, you can download the Ten Percent Happier app today: https://10percenthappier.app.link/install Full Shownotes: https://www.tenpercent.com/podcast-episode/kristin-neff-360

Jaksot(953)

How To Communicate Effectively With Other Human Beings

How To Communicate Effectively With Other Human Beings

Sharing an episode featuring Dan from a podcast we love, Think Fast, Talk Smart. In this episode of Think Fast, Talk Smart, Dan and host Matt Abrahams discuss how mindfulness can transform our communication, sharing strategies for deeper listening, responding versus reacting, and reflecting what others say back to them. "Relationships are the most important aspect of your happiness," Dan says. "The quality of those connections goes up when you're less stuck in your own head." Episode References: Dan Harris: https://www.fastersmarter.io/guests/dan-harris/ Dan's Books: http://fastersmarter.io/10-percent-happier https://fastersmarter.io/meditation-for-fidgety-skeptics https://www.fastersmarter.io/179-communication-happiness-wellbeing-finding-positive-in-negative-emotions/ https://www.fastersmarter.io/180-unlocking-your-future-self-communication-happiness-wellbeing/ https://www.fastersmarter.io/181-why-happiness-is-a-direction-not-a-destination-communication-happiness-wellbeing/ https://www.fastersmarter.io/182-stop-chasing-time-and-start-owning-it-communication-happiness-wellbeing/ Tickets are now on sale for a special live taping of the 10% Happier Podcast with guest Pete Holmes! Join us on November 18th in NYC for this benefit show, with all proceeds supporting the New York Insight Meditation Center. Grab your tickets here! Tickets are now available for an intimate live event with Dan on November 23rd as part of the Troutbeck Luminary Series. Join the conversation, participate in a guided meditation, and ask your questions during the Q&A. Click here to buy your ticket! Join Dan's online community here Follow Dan on social: Instagram, TikTok Subscribe to our YouTube Channel To advertise on the show, contact sales@advertisecast.com or visit https://advertising.libsyn.com/10HappierwithDanHarris

26 Loka 25min

Do You Feel Like Everybody Sucks? Here's a 10-Minute Pain Reliever.

Do You Feel Like Everybody Sucks? Here's a 10-Minute Pain Reliever.

If the idea of "sending love to all beings" makes you roll your eyes, this episode is for you. Dan leads a guided meditation, suitable for all levels of experience. Originally recorded during one of our live sangha gatherings on Substack, which are open to paid subscribers at DanHarris.com. Tickets are now on sale for a special live taping of the 10% Happier Podcast with guest Pete Holmes! Join us on November 18th in NYC for this benefit show, with all proceeds supporting the New York Insight Meditation Center. Grab your tickets here! Tickets are now available for an intimate live event with Dan on November 23rd as part of the Troutbeck Luminary Series. Join the conversation, participate in a guided meditation, and ask your questions during the Q&A. Click here to buy your ticket! Join Dan's online community here Follow Dan on social: Instagram, TikTok Subscribe to our YouTube Channel To advertise on the show, contact sales@advertisecast.com or visit https://advertising.libsyn.com/10HappierwithDanHarris Thanks to today's sponsor:  BetterHelp: If you're ready to find the right therapist for you, BetterHelp can help you start that journey. Our listeners get 10% off their first month at betterhelp.com/Happier.

24 Loka 12min

How To Perform Under Pressure—With Both Peace and Confidence | Jim Murphy

How To Perform Under Pressure—With Both Peace and Confidence | Jim Murphy

A performance coach and bestselling author shares practical tools for thriving in crisis, shaving down the ego, and designing the life you want. #1 New York Times bestselling author Jim Murphy is a Performance Coach to some of the best athletes and leaders in the world. In addition to coaching professional athletes and executives, Murphy is the president of the Inner Excellence Freedom Project whose mission is to build communities to alleviate spiritual and physical poverty around the world. In this episode we talk about: A counterintuitive secret to performing under pressure How to "relanguage" the story you tell about yourself A crucial life question that everyone should be asking themselves Practical tools for "inner excellence" Jim's Four Daily Goals Cultivating non-attachment to results How to be less afraid of fear The "expect nothing" rule And the role of faith in his life Join Dan's online community here Follow Dan on social: Instagram, TikTok Subscribe to our YouTube Channel Get ready for another Meditation Party at Omega Institute! This in-person workshop brings together Dan with his friends and meditation teachers, Sebene Selassie, Jeff Warren, and for the first time, Ofosu Jones-Quartey. The event runs October 24th-26th. Sign up and learn more here! Tickets are now on sale for a special live taping of the 10% Happier Podcast with guest Pete Holmes! Join us on November 18th in NYC for this benefit show, with all proceeds supporting the New York Insight Meditation Center. Grab your tickets here! To advertise on the show, contact sales@advertisecast.com or visit https://advertising.libsyn.com/10HappierwithDanHarris Thanks to our sponsors: AT&T: Staying connected matters. That's why AT&T has connectivity you can depend on, or they will proactively make it right. Visit att.com/guarantee for details. Function: Our first 1000 listeners get a $100 credit toward their membership. Visit www.functionhealth.com/Happier or use the gift code Happier100 at signup to own your health. Fabletics:  Treat yourself to gear that looks good, feels good, and doesn't break the bank. Go to fabletics.com/Happier, sign up as a VIP and get 80% off everything.

22 Loka 1h 20min

The Science Of Getting Out Of Your Head | Annie Murphy Paul

The Science Of Getting Out Of Your Head | Annie Murphy Paul

An acclaimed science writer on how to upgrade your mind by using more than your head. Annie Murphy Paul is a science writer and TED speaker. Her latest book is The Extended Mind: The Power of Thinking Outside the Brain. In this episode we talk about: Why upgrading your mind involves more than just using your head. How our bodies, surroundings, and relationships all have the power to enhance our thinking. Practical strategies for "thinking with the body," including interoception, the role of intuition, movement breaks, and even fidgeting. The importance of gesture and movement—why sitting perfectly still actually makes thinking harder for many of us. Tips for "thinking with your surroundings"—from stepping outdoors to using evocative objects and whiteboards to organize your ideas. The social side of thinking: how to learn from experts, think with peers, and harness the intelligence of groups. The challenges—and potential—of group collaboration, avoiding the pitfalls of groupthink, and fostering what psychologists call "groupiness." The concept of "extension inequality": why access to the resources that enhance thinking—like nature, movement, and mentorship—is not distributed equally, and why that matters. And finally, why returning to the way kids learn—using hands, bodies, play, and connection—might actually be good for all of us. Join Dan's online community here Follow Dan on social: Instagram, TikTok Subscribe to our YouTube Channel Get ready for another Meditation Party at Omega Institute! This in-person workshop brings together Dan with his friends and meditation teachers, Sebene Selassie, Jeff Warren, and for the first time, Ofosu Jones-Quartey. The event runs October 24th-26th. Sign up and learn more here! Tickets are now on sale for a special live taping of the 10% Happier Podcast with guest Pete Holmes! Join us on November 18th in NYC for this benefit show, with all proceeds supporting the New York Insight Meditation Center. Grab your tickets here! To advertise on the show, contact sales@advertisecast.com or visit https://advertising.libsyn.com/10HappierwithDanHarris.

20 Loka 59min

How Can I Meditate (Or Do Anything Else) When I'm in Pain? | Sebene Selassie

How Can I Meditate (Or Do Anything Else) When I'm in Pain? | Sebene Selassie

A longtime cancer survivor — and our Teacher of the Month — has some suggestions for working with pain. Join Dan's online community here Follow Dan on social: Instagram, TikTok Subscribe to our YouTube Channel Get ready for another Meditation Party at Omega Institute! This in-person workshop brings together Dan with his friends and meditation teachers, Sebene Selassie, Jeff Warren, and for the first time, Ofosu Jones-Quartey. The event runs October 24th-26th. Sign up and learn more at eomega.org/workshops/meditation-party-2025. Tickets are now on sale for a special live taping of the 10% Happier Podcast with guest Pete Holmes! Join us on November 18th in NYC for this benefit show, with all proceeds supporting the New York Insight Meditation Center. Grab your tickets here! To advertise on the show, contact sales@advertisecast.com or visit https://advertising.libsyn.com/10HappierwithDanHarris Thanks to our sponsor: Airbnb: Your home might be worth more than you think. Find out how much at airbnb.com/host.

19 Loka 23min

Telling Harsh Stories to Yourself About Yourself? How To Rewrite the Narrative. | Allison Sweet Grant

Telling Harsh Stories to Yourself About Yourself? How To Rewrite the Narrative. | Allison Sweet Grant

Nobody makes it out of childhood unscathed. Here's a guide to letting go of the past. Allison Sweet Grant, graduate with dual master's degrees from the University of Michigan, is a psychiatric nurse practitioner, turned author. She has been published in The New York Times and The Atlantic. She is the author of two children's picture books, The Gift Inside the Box and Leif and the Fall, co-authored with her husband Adam Grant. I Am the Cage is her debut novel. In this episode we talk about: The impact of your childhood trauma on your adult relationships The concept of the "junk drawer" (a metaphor for all the pain, self-doubt, and anxiety you might try to compartmentalize) Writing as a tool for self-acceptance and self-compassion How to re-write your own story and where to start Practical meditation tools to quiet the mind The role of cathartic visualization Dealing with imposter syndrome And more Join Dan's online community here Follow Dan on social: Instagram, TikTok Subscribe to our YouTube Channel Get ready for another Meditation Party at Omega Institute! This in-person workshop brings together Dan with his friends and meditation teachers, Sebene Selassie, Jeff Warren, and for the first time, Ofosu Jones-Quartey. The event runs October 24th-26th. Sign up and learn more here! Tickets are now on sale for a special live taping of the 10% Happier Podcast with guest Pete Holmes! Join us on November 18th in NYC for this benefit show, with all proceeds supporting the New York Insight Meditation Center. Grab your tickets here! To advertise on the show, contact sales@advertisecast.com or visit https://advertising.libsyn.com/10HappierwithDanHarris. Thanks to our sponsors: Bumble: Thinking about dating again? Take this as your sign and start your love story on Bumble. Airbnb: Your home might be worth more than you think. Find out how much at airbnb.com/host.

17 Loka 46min

Is There Such a Thing as Healthy Shame and Embarrassment? | JoAnna Hardy

Is There Such a Thing as Healthy Shame and Embarrassment? | JoAnna Hardy

A Buddhist recipe for speaking, working, and living in a way that will make you happy. JoAnna Hardy has practiced in multiple traditions since 1999. She is currently a meditation trainer at Apple Fitness+, a visiting teacher at Black Being LA, a visiting retreat teacher at Insight Meditation Society, and about to embark on a new mystery journey! In this episode we talk about: Sila, the Buddhist code of ethics Concepts such as right livelihood and right speech Why we lie The power of Buddhist tattoos Hiri and Otappa (AKA healthy shame and healthy embarrassment) Related Episodes: How to Speak Clearly, Calmly, and Without Alienating People | Dan Clurman and Mudita Nisker Oren Jay Sofer, Practicing Mindful Communication The Buddha's 8-Part Manual for a Good Life | Brother Pháp Dung The Surprising Power of "Healthy Embarrassment" | Koshin Paley Ellison The Selfish Case for Being Ethical | Eugene Cash Join Dan's online community here Follow Dan on social: Instagram, TikTok Subscribe to our YouTube Channel Get ready for another Meditation Party at Omega Institute! This in-person workshop brings together Dan with his friends and meditation teachers, Sebene Selassie, Jeff Warren, and for the first time, Ofosu Jones-Quartey. The event runs October 24th-26th. Sign up and learn more here! Tickets are now on sale for a special live taping of the 10% Happier Podcast with guest Pete Holmes! Join us on November 18th in NYC for this benefit show, with all proceeds supporting the New York Insight Meditation Center. Grab your tickets here! To advertise on the show, contact sales@advertisecast.com or visit https://advertising.libsyn.com/10HappierwithDanHarris Thanks to our sponsors: Airbnb: Your home might be worth more than you think. Find out how much at airbnb.com/host. AT&T: Staying connected matters. That's why AT&T has connectivity you can depend on, or they will proactively make it right. Visit att.com/guarantee for details. Function: Our first 1000 listeners get a $100 credit toward their membership. Visit www.functionhealth.com/Happier or use the gift code Happier100 at signup to own your health.

15 Loka 1h 17min

How To Handle the Parts of Yourself That You Wish Didn't Exist | Satya Doyle Byock

How To Handle the Parts of Yourself That You Wish Didn't Exist | Satya Doyle Byock

How to do "shadow work," interpret your dreams, and find your "self." Satya Doyle Byock is a psychotherapist and educator focused on the relationship with the unconscious. She is the director of The Salome Institute of Jungian Studies and the author of the book Quarterlife: The Search for Self in Early Adulthood. She writes weekly and hosts regular workshops on her Substack, Self & Society. In this episode we talk about: The vast impact of Carl Jung's work What separates Freud and Jung The connection between Jung's ideas and Buddhism Practical exercises to help us resolve the tension between safety and meaning – between stability and taking a walk on the wild side Dreamwork: what it is, why we should do it, and the "how to" The perks of making the unconscious feel seen Join Dan's online community here Follow Dan on social: Instagram, TikTok Subscribe to our YouTube Channel Additional Resources: Satya's Substack, Self & Society. Satya's new year-round program in Jungian Psychology and Myth (registration opens December 1; class begins February 2026) Get ready for another Meditation Party at Omega Institute! This in-person workshop brings together Dan with his friends and meditation teachers, Sebene Selassie, Jeff Warren, and for the first time, Ofosu Jones-Quartey. The event runs October 24th-26th. Sign up and learn more here! Tickets are now on sale for a special live taping of the 10% Happier Podcast with guest Pete Holmes! Join us on November 18th in NYC for this benefit show, with all proceeds supporting the New York Insight Meditation Center. Grab your tickets here! To advertise on the show, contact sales@advertisecast.com or visit https://advertising.libsyn.com/10HappierwithDanHarris

13 Loka 1h 6min

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