Are You a Grudge Holder or a Revenge Seeker? Here’s How It’s Hurting You – And How To Get Over It | James Kimmel, Jr.

Are You a Grudge Holder or a Revenge Seeker? Here’s How It’s Hurting You – And How To Get Over It | James Kimmel, Jr.

The psychology and neuroscience of revenge.

James Kimmel, Jr. is a lecturer in psychiatry at the Yale School of Medicine, an expert on revenge, a lawyer, and the founder and co-director of the Yale Collaborative for Motive Control Studies. He is the creator of The Nonjustice System, the Miracle Court app, and SavingCain.org for recovering from grievances and revenge desires and preventing mass violence. His most recent book is The Science of Revenge: Understanding the World’s Deadliest Addiction—and How to Overcome It.



In this episode we talk about:

  • The horrific and violent bullying he endured as a child—which provoked his interest in the subject of revenge
  • The connection between revenge and addiction
  • Our evolutionary programming for revenge
  • Practical strategies for when you feel wronged
  • How to seek justice without revenge
  • An antidote to revenge cravings
  • And much more



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Get ready for another Meditation Party at Omega Institute! This in-person workshop brings together Dan with his friends and meditation teachers, Sebene Selassie, Jeff Warren, and for the first time, Ofosu Jones-Quartey. The event runs October 24th-26th. Sign up and learn more here!



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George Mumford

George Mumford

George Mumford has taught mindfulness and meditation to some of the greatest athletes of all time: Michael Jordan, Kobe Bryant and Shaquille O'Neal, among others. In partnership with the legendary coach Phil Jackson, Mumford taught meditation to the Chicago Bulls and Los Angeles Lakers, and now works with the New York Knicks. He’s also the author of "The Mindful Athlete: The Secret to Pure Performance."

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David Gelles

David Gelles

The author of "Mindful Work," New York Times reporter David Gelles is a self-described "sporadic meditator." During the day, Gelles says he uses so-called "meditation hacks," such as waiting a beat or two before picking up a ringing phone or practicing walking meditation around the office at work. Earlier this month, he wrote an op-ed for the New York Times Sunday Review called "The Hidden Price of Mindfulness, Inc.," in which he talked about the "mindfulness economy" and the hundreds of products out there, from books to apps to a dairy-free mayonnaise substitute called Mindful Mayo, all carrying a "mindfulness" label.

30 Maalis 201654min

Amy Cuddy

Amy Cuddy

Amy Cuddy has created a bonafide sensation in the world of happiness and well-being. A social psychologist at Harvard Business School and a New York Times best-selling author, Cuddy gave a TED Talk that has been viewed millions of times about how to make yourself look, feel and act more powerful, through something she calls "power poses."

27 Maalis 201655min

Dr. Jay Michaelson

Dr. Jay Michaelson

Dr. Jay Michaelson is a lawyer, a rabbi, a legal/religion columnist for The Daily Beast, an LGBT activist, a professor, and an author of six books. Yet despite his staggering number of day jobs, Michaelson has also found time to intensively practice meditation. In fact, add another job to the resume: He’s also a meditation teacher. And not only does he practice and teach meditation, he says he’s had experiences of enlightenment, or "awakening."

23 Maalis 201652min

Brian Koppelman

Brian Koppelman

The filmmaker and co-creator of the TV show "Billions" talks about his practice of Transcendental Meditation.

18 Maalis 201645min

Weezer's Rivers Cuomo

Weezer's Rivers Cuomo

Weezer frontman Rivers Cuomo has been writing and singing hit songs for more than two decades. But this Grammy-winning rocker, whose lyrics about relationships, promiscuity and drug use helped Weezer become what some argue is the father of today's emo genre, credits his success and stability to his daily practice of meditation.

11 Maalis 201656min

Dalai Lama

Dalai Lama

How can you live a happier life? In our debut episode, Dan Harris sits down with the Dalai Lama and Richard Davidson, a neuroscientist and founder of the Center for Healthy Minds. His Holiness and Richardson have collaborated for years on research looking at the impact meditation can have on the brain. Please leave us a review! ----> http://bit.ly/2lkYXxT

11 Maalis 201627min

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