5. The B Word

5. The B Word

In this episode, we talk about the “B Word.” BUDGET. Mention the word “budget” and reactions can vary from wide-eyed to confusion to sheer panic, but rarely do you receive a positive reaction. Mention the words, "lifestyle analysis,” and the responding look can be very similar. However, when going through the process of divorce, these two concepts are critical components before, during, and after divorce. How many of us even think of our lives as “lifestyles?” When dating the person who became your spouse, it might have been the difference in lifestyle that was part of the attraction. Here’s this person that you really like and they’re bringing something new into your world. You get married, and now you’re faced with aligning your lifestyles, creating a new shared lifestyle together. Sometimes, your lifestyles are too incompatible for the long run, and you head for divorce. Lifestyle is an important aspect to consider, especially when we have to make shifts in our budget. Lifestyle Analysis vs. Budget What is a “lifestyle analysis” and how does it relate to a budget? Your lifestyle is the way you’ve become accustomed to living. Do you dine out a lot? How large is your marital home? What car do you drive and what are its maintenance costs? Do you take family vacations, attend events, have a cleaning service? When going through a divorce, one of the first questions you’ll need to answer is what is your financial need regarding support, what is the lifestyle you’re accustomed to living, and how will those two factors work together. Your budget is made up of the items and expenses you need to maintain a household. What are your expenses? What is the income you need for your cash flow? What are the “extras” that come up? Budget is a critical component before, during, and after divorce because the court system, your mediator, or anyone assisting you through the process will use your budget as a guide for what your needs truly are. Other factors -- if you're a business owner or receive bonuses from your employer -- aren't as apparent as a paycheck, so the ability to recreate your expense list and know your lifestyle is really important. It'll help them make sure you have what you need moving forward. Know also that if you lived on a shoestring budget during your marriage, that shoestring is going to get a little thinner, especially during the divorce process. Prepare your budget based on a household income of one, especially until your support is decided and starts coming in. Even after all of this, if you can’t meet your budget, maybe you can negotiate a raise with your employer or arrange a loan from a family member to tide you over. There’s no question; your money mindset has to change in divorce. Put It on Paper Committing your budget to paper will help you think through the process, and you’ll have it to keep you accountable. Laying it out like this will help you know exactly what you need, helping you know how to adjust, even helping you decide what type of job to get. Some of the categories you’ll encounter as you prepare your financials for divorce are: Food Expense: groceries, toiletries, cleaning supplies, and casual dining out. Auto Expense: car payment, gasoline, maintenance Clothing Expense: shoes, clothing purchases that are necessities, repairs/alterations, and related items Laundry Expense: cost of laundry service, dry cleaning School Expense: tuition, supplies, field trips, lunch money, dues, tutors, locker rentals, arts & crafts supplies Entertainment Expense: fine dining, sporting events, concerts, movies, theater, vacations Incidental Expenses: cosmetics, hair and nail appointments, books, magazines, business dues, memberships, pets, donations, gifts, hobbies, and other outstanding payments Home Appliance Expenses Savings Accounts (ideal goal is to save 10% of your annual income) College Tuition Savings Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

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214. Divorce Settlement Calculator: Can You Actually Afford to Keep the House?

214. Divorce Settlement Calculator: Can You Actually Afford to Keep the House?

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213. Trauma Bonds, Financial Control & Divorce: Reclaiming Your Power

213. Trauma Bonds, Financial Control & Divorce: Reclaiming Your Power

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212. Dividing a Business in Divorce: What the Valuation Doesn’t Tell You

212. Dividing a Business in Divorce: What the Valuation Doesn’t Tell You

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9 Sep 28min

211. From Heartbreak to Independence: Starting Over After Divorce

211. From Heartbreak to Independence: Starting Over After Divorce

What happens when the life you planned suddenly falls apart—and you have to decide what comes next? Three years after her first appearance on We Chat Divorce, bestselling author, filmmaker, and creat...

3 Sep 35min

210. Financial Clarity Before Divorce: Rethinking Prenups, Postnups and Separation Agreements

210. Financial Clarity Before Divorce: Rethinking Prenups, Postnups and Separation Agreements

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26 Aug 35min

209. How to Rewire Your Brain and Rebuild Your Life After Toxic Love

209. How to Rewire Your Brain and Rebuild Your Life After Toxic Love

The divorce may be final—or still unfolding—but your mind and body may remain stuck in survival mode. In this episode of We Chat Divorce, Karen Chellew and Catherine Shanahan welcome back Jackie Mill...

19 Aug 38min

208. Should You Keep the House in Divorce? Why Your Realtor Can't Answer That Alone

208. Should You Keep the House in Divorce? Why Your Realtor Can't Answer That Alone

Should you keep the house in your divorce — or sell it? Your realtor can give you an answer. But excellent real estate advice can still be a costly divorce mistake. In this episode of Divorce Explore...

12 Aug 24min

207. How to Trust Yourself in Divorce: Stop Overthinking and Make Clear Decisions with Amy Armstrong

207. How to Trust Yourself in Divorce: Stop Overthinking and Make Clear Decisions with Amy Armstrong

Divorce can make even the most confident person question every decision. When fear, conflicting advice, and financial uncertainty take over, how do you determine what is truly right for you? Divorce ...

5 Aug 45min

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