Why You Can Get Hard to Porn But Not Your Partner — And How to Fix It | Ep. 164

Why You Can Get Hard to Porn But Not Your Partner — And How to Fix It | Ep. 164

In this episode, I'm addressing one of the most common — and least talked-about — causes of erectile dysfunction in midlife men: porn-related ED. If you or someone you love has noticed that things work just fine alone but shut down with a real partner, this isn't about age, hormones, or anything being wrong with you. It's about your brain — and how repeated exposure to high-stimulation content has recalibrated your arousal system. I break down exactly what's happening neurologically, why midlife men are particularly vulnerable, and walk through three clear steps to stop the cycle, rewire your brain, and rebuild real-world intimacy. This is not about shame. It's about understanding a pattern — and changing it.

IN THIS EPISODE:

00:00 Introduction — The Problem No One Talks About

00:25 Podcast Intro

00:58 What Porn-Related ED Actually Is

01:38 What's Happening in Your Brain

02:35 Why Midlife Men Are Especially Vulnerable

03:10 Step 1: Stop Desensitizing Your Brain

04:00 Step 2: Rewire Your Brain

04:48 Step 3: Resensitize Your Brain to Real Pleasure

05:42 You're Not Broken — Patterns Can Change

Want a deeper look? Watch the full episode on YouTube for a more visual experience of today’s discussion. This episode is best enjoyed on video—don’t miss out

Karen Bigman, a Sexual Health Alliance Certified Sex Educator, Life, and Menopause Coach, tackles the often-taboo subject of sexuality with a straightforward and candid approach. We explore the intricacies of sex during perimenopause, post-menopause, and andropause, offering insights and support for all those experiencing these transformative phases.


This podcast is not intended to give medical advice. Karen Bigman is not a medical professional. For any medical questions or issues, please visit your licensed medical provider.


Looking for some fresh perspective on sex in midlife? You can find me here:

Email: karen@taboototruth.com

Website: https://www.taboototruth.com/

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/taboototruth

YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@taboototruthpodcast



Karen Bigman, a Sexual Health Alliance Certified Sex Educator, Life, and Menopause Coach, tackles the often-taboo subject of sexuality with a straightforward and candid approach. We explore the intricacies of sex during perimenopause, post-menopause, and andropause, offering insights and support for all those experiencing these transformative phases.

This podcast is not intended to give medical advice. Karen Bigman is not a medical professional. For any medical questions or issues, please visit your licensed medical provider.

Looking for some fresh perspective on sex in midlife? You can find me here:

Email: karen@taboototruth.com

Website: https://www.taboototruth.com/

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/taboototruth

YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@taboototruthpodcast

Substack: https://karenbigman.substack.com

Take control of your pleasure with my Pleasure Playbook, filled with tips to help you connect with your body and enhance intimacy. Download it now at www.taboototruth.com/pleasureplaybook.

LINKS, EXCLUSIVE VIP DISCOUNTS, COURSES & FREEBIES

🚨 If you are a man navigating your partner’s menopause and feel lost, check out my NEW course ‘Men Meet Menopause’! AND to celebrate the launch, iI am giving you 20% off with code MMPLAUNCH20 https://bit.ly/MeenMeetMenopause

🥰 If you want her to want you more — start by understanding her body better. Free resources → https://www.taboototruth.com/free-resources

💋 Hotter, Wilder, Wiser | You’ve mastered everything else in life — now master pleasure! https://www.taboototruth.com/hotter-wilder-wiser

🔥 Ready to spice things up? This Yes/No/Maybe list is your permission slip for pleasure. https://www.taboototruth.com/free-resources-1/yes%2Fno%2Fmaybe%3F

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Avsnitt(226)

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Testosterone for Men vs. Women: The Truth About Libido, Energy & Orgasm | Ep. 204

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In this episode, I'm sharing something completely different: a firsthand account of a weekend I had in Montreal. I was there for an Advanced SAR — a Sexual Attitude Reassessment, the kind of training ...

22 Sep 17min

The Male G-Spot 101: The Truth About Prostate Massage, Risk, and the Anus Myth | Ep. 202

The Male G-Spot 101: The Truth About Prostate Massage, Risk, and the Anus Myth | Ep. 202

The prostate, also called the male G-spot, is a walnut-sized gland most straight men never want to talk about, and this episode is exactly that conversation. I get into what it does, how it's tied to ...

18 Sep 18min

How To Fix Performance Anxiety In The Bedroom, According To Sex Coach Alex Grendi | Ep. 201

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In this episode, I'm talking with Alex Grendi, a men's intimacy and confidence coach who spent years quietly numbing his own performance anxiety before he understood what was actually driving it. Alex...

15 Sep 20min

Why Your Marriage Went Sexless — And How to Talk About It Again | Ep. 200

Why Your Marriage Went Sexless — And How to Talk About It Again | Ep. 200

In this episode, I'm kicking off season 7 — and marking 200 episodes of Taboo to Truth — with one of the topics that comes up in my practice more than almost anything else: sexless marriages. From the...

12 Sep 14min

The Secret to Reconnecting in a Sexless Marriage with Coach Mike Elliott | Ep. 198 (Part 2)

The Secret to Reconnecting in a Sexless Marriage with Coach Mike Elliott | Ep. 198 (Part 2)

In part two of my conversation with men's coach Mike Elliott, we get into how couples actually reconnect and rebuild intimacy after a sexless marriage, low desire, or years of disconnection in midlife...

8 Sep 23min

The Impact of Sexual Rejection: What It Does to Your Brain, Body & Relationship | Ep. 199

The Impact of Sexual Rejection: What It Does to Your Brain, Body & Relationship | Ep. 199

Chronic sexual rejection in a relationship doesn't just cause hurt feelings, it rewires how a person feels about themselves, their body, and their worth.In this episode I break down what's actually ha...

4 Sep 16min

The Secret to Reconnecting in a Sexless Marriage with Coach Mike Elliott | Ep. 198 (Part 1)

The Secret to Reconnecting in a Sexless Marriage with Coach Mike Elliott | Ep. 198 (Part 1)

Every conversation about a sexless marriage gets pointed at the woman. Low desire, hormones, resentment, the mental load, she's the one who's supposed to explain herself. Nobody asks what happens on t...

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