Poop Fumes in the Mouth Wash

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We’re back again… this time from a brand new studio that looks way more put together than we actually are.

Because behind the scenes? We just got back from Texas and we are running on absolutely nothing... no sleep, mild delusion, and whatever kind of energy you get from airport snacks and poor decisions.

We break down the entire Rock the Country trip, including a rental car that came back looking like it fought in a war (and charged us accordingly), a flight that felt like it was held together by prayer, and some of the most bizarre human beings we’ve ever encountered in public. At one point we’re pretty sure a man was just casually eating birdseed… like that was a normal thing to do.

From there, we spiral (naturally) into Cousin Counsel where we tackle quitting your 9–5 to become a content creator, which sounds fun until you realize it’s 90% emails, stress, and explaining your life choices to people who don’t get it.

We also get into what to do when you’re in a “perfect” relationship but somehow still bored (spoiler: it’s probably you), and confirm that yes… having full-blown fake arguments in your head is completely normal and honestly necessary at this point.

Somewhere along the way, Riley admits to cutting open a couch with a kitchen knife as a child in a completely rational attempt to retrieve a dead iPad, and we also get into sleep preferences that could genuinely end friendships because if you’re sleeping at 72 degrees, we have questions.

If you’ve ever been personally victimized by travel, questioned your sanity mid-flight, or created an entire imaginary argument just to win it later… this episode is for you.

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Landon Mauk:

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