What Science and Buddhism Say About How to Regulate Your Own Nervous System | Deb Dana & Kaira Jewel Lingo

What Science and Buddhism Say About How to Regulate Your Own Nervous System | Deb Dana & Kaira Jewel Lingo

Is it possible to learn to spot which state your nervous system is in and move from suboptimal states to much better ones? The subject of how to work with your own nervous system is called Polyvagal Theory and today’s guests Deb Dana & Kaira Jewel Lingo will give us a primer on what that exactly means. They will also talk about how our nervous systems are connected to the nervous systems of other people, and how we can learn to co-regulate our systems for the betterment of others.


Deb Dana is a Licensed Clinical Social Worker, who is a clinician, consultant and author specializing in complex trauma. Her work is focused on using the lens of Polyvagal Theory to understand and resolve the impact of trauma, and creating ways of working that honor the role of the autonomic nervous system. She has written several books, including Anchored: How to Befriend Your Nervous System Using Polyvagal Theory.

Kaira Jewel Lingo is a Dharma teacher with a lifelong interest in spirituality and social justice. After living as an ordained nun for 15 years in Thich Nhat Hanh’s monastic community, Kaira Jewel now teaches internationally in the Zen lineage and the Vipassana tradition, as well as in secular mindfulness, with a focus on activists, Black, Indigenous, and People of Color, artists, educators, families, and youth. She is author of We Were Made for These Times: Ten Lessons for Moving Through Change, Loss, and Disruption.

This is the third installment of our series called, The Art and Science of Keeping Your Sh*t Together. In each episode we bring together a meditative adept or Buddhist scholar and a respected scientist. The idea is to give you the best of both worlds to arm you with both modern and ancient tools for regulating your emotions.


In this episode we talk about:

  • The basics of Polyvagal Theory
  • A fascinating and easily graspable concept from Buddhist psychology called, “store consciousness”
  • The interconnectedness of our nervous systems and the responsibility that creates for all of us
  • How to handle being annoyed
  • What happens when we beat ourselves up with “shoulds,” and how to stop doing that
  • The value of simply knowing, in the moments when you’re stuck, that those moments are impermanent
  • How to allow your suffering to inform your life
  • The value of “micro-moments”
  • Two ways of caring for painful states without suppressing them
  • And the power of action and service in overcoming anxiety



Full Shownotes: www.tenpercent.com/podcast-episode/deb-dana-kaira-jewel-lingo-522

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The Gulf Between Your Internal Life And How The World Sees You | Anna Marie Tendler

The Gulf Between Your Internal Life And How The World Sees You | Anna Marie Tendler

New episodes come out every Monday, Wednesday, and Friday for free, with 1-week early access for Wondery+ subscribers --- Lessons learned from the psychiatric hospital We’ve got a fascinating and very personal discussion today about the often very painful gap between the way you feel on the inside and the way the world perceives you. We also cover the urgency and difficulty of sitting with your own discomfort.  Anna Marie Tendler is an artist and writer. She is also the author of a new memoir called ‘Men Have Called Her Crazy’.  In this episode we talk about: The circumstances of her checking into a psychiatric hospital in 2021 The difference between our interior emotions and our exterior selves The help she found through Dialectical Behavior Therapy – DBT We dive into a very specific theme of the book – and its title – the insidious ways in which men have impacted her life.  And lastly, how she found a way to sit with discomfort and pain, while showing up in the world authentically to herself. Related Episodes: #510. Me, a Love Story: How Being OK With Yourself Makes You Better at Everything | Sharon Salzberg The Science Of Speaking Up For Yourself | Elaine Lin Hering (Co-interviewed by Dan's wife Bianca!) Sign up for Dan’s weekly newsletter here Follow Dan on social: Instagram, TikTok Ten Percent Happier online bookstore Subscribe to our YouTube Channel Our favorite playlists on: Anxiety, Sleep, Relationships, Most Popular Episodes Full Shownotes: https://www.tenpercent.com/tph/podcast-episode/anna-marie-tendler

12 Aug 20241h 4min

Jeff Tweedy (From Wilco) On: Music As A Lifeline, Shame, Schadenfreude, And Freaking Out On Weed

Jeff Tweedy (From Wilco) On: Music As A Lifeline, Shame, Schadenfreude, And Freaking Out On Weed

New episodes come out every Monday, Wednesday, and Friday for free, with 1-week early access for Wondery+ subscribers. Dan dweebs out with a dad rock icon. Jeff Tweedy is the lead singer and songwriter of the Grammy award winning rock band, Wilco. The band have put out 13 albums… and shortly after this interview was conducted, the band put out a new EP. Jeff has released two solo albums and has written three books, including his latest, which is called World Within A Song: Music That Changed My Life And Life That Changed My Music. This interview is part of an occasional series we do called Boldface, where we talk to well known people who are willing to go there. We’ve already dropped two Boldface episodes this week: the rapper and author Common and the actress, activist and author Goldie Hawn. Sign up for Dan’s weekly newsletter here Follow Dan on social: Instagram, TikTok Ten Percent Happier online bookstore Subscribe to our YouTube Channel Our favorite playlists on: Anxiety, Sleep, Relationships, Most Popular Episodes Full Shownotes: https://happierapp.com/podcast/tph/jeff-tweedy-813 Additional Resources: Download the Ten Percent Happier app today: https://10percenthappier.app.link/install

9 Aug 202441min

Eight Things I’m Doing To Stay Sane During Election Season | Dan Harris

Eight Things I’m Doing To Stay Sane During Election Season | Dan Harris

A personal program for working with election-induced anxiety. We’re dropping a special/experimental pod today, because we know a lot of you are freaking out about the election — so Dan’s going to talk through some strategies he is personally using to keep it together during this turbulent time.  Additional Resources:  Podcast episode with Bill Doherty (Braver Angels) Feedback form: let us know what you think! Sign up for Dan’s weekly newsletter here Follow Dan on social: Instagram, TikTok Ten Percent Happier online bookstore Subscribe to our YouTube Channel Our favorite playlists on: Anxiety, Sleep, Relationships, Most Popular Episodes Full Shownotes: https://www.tenpercent.com/tph/podcast-episode/dan-harris-election Additional Resources: Download the Ten Percent Happier app today: https://10percenthappier.app.link/install

9 Aug 202427min

A Candid Conversation With The Rapper Common On: Self-Worth, Fitness, Trauma, And The Evolution Of Vulnerability In Hip-Hop

A Candid Conversation With The Rapper Common On: Self-Worth, Fitness, Trauma, And The Evolution Of Vulnerability In Hip-Hop

New episodes come out every Monday, Wednesday, and Friday for free, with 1-week early access for Wondery+ subscribers. --- This multi-hyphenate opens up about his four pillars of health and success Common is an Oscar, Golden Globe, Emmy, and Grammy Award–winning music artist. He is an actor and producer, and has appeared in numerous critically acclaimed films, as well as hit TV series. He is the author of One Day It’ll All Make Sense and Let Love Have the Last Word, which were both New York Times bestsellers. He was raised in Chicago and currently resides in Brooklyn. In this episode we talk about: Common’s relationship with self esteem growing up, and where he eventually found his own self worth. What it’s like dealing with rejection as an artist His book ‘And Then We Rise’ The four different wellness pillars in his book; food, the body, the mind, and the soul The positive impact that therapy has had on his life What his meditation practice looks like The evolution of vulnerability in hip hop The evolution of vulnerability in his life And his relationship with spirituality Related Episodes: Rewire How You Talk To Yourself | Ofosu Jones-Quartey #597. Mike D On: The Value of Failure, the Addictive Power of Adrenaline, and How a Beastie Boy Got Into Lovingkindness #311 Karamo: How To Actually Do Self-Love Sign up for Dan’s weekly newsletter here Follow Dan on social: Instagram, TikTok Ten Percent Happier online bookstore Subscribe to our YouTube Channel Our favorite playlists on: Anxiety, Sleep, Relationships, Most Popular Episodes Full Shownotes: https://www.tenpercent.com/tph/podcast-episode/common

7 Aug 202454min

Goldie Hawn On: “Brain Breaks,” Curiosity, And How To Make A Romantic Relationship Last For 30 Years

Goldie Hawn On: “Brain Breaks,” Curiosity, And How To Make A Romantic Relationship Last For 30 Years

New episodes come out every Monday, Wednesday, and Friday for free, with 1-week early access for Wondery+ subscribers. Don’t be fooled by the bubbly public persona. Goldie Hawn is an Academy Award winning actress, producer, director, and best-selling author. She’s written two best-selling books, a memoir called A Lotus Grows in the Mud and then, more recently, 10 Mindful Minutes, which is for kids and parents. She is also the Founder of MindUP, a charity that equips children with mental fitness. In this episode we talk about: How she got interested in meditation — a story that, like Dan’s, involves panic attacks The power of curiosity  What she means when she talks about God What it means to take a “brain break” Why jealousy has never really been part of her repertoire And how to make a romantic relationship last. Related Episodes: How To Live A Happier Life | The Dalai Lama & Dr. Richard Davidson Sign up for Dan’s weekly newsletter here Follow Dan on social: Instagram, TikTok Ten Percent Happier online bookstore Subscribe to our YouTube Channel Our favorite playlists on: Anxiety, Sleep, Relationships, Most Popular Episodes Full Shownotes: https://www.tenpercent.com/tph/podcast-episode/goldie-hawn Additional Resources: Download the Ten Percent Happier app today: https://10percenthappier.app.link/install

5 Aug 20241h 3min

What It’s Like To Do A Year-Long Silent Meditation Retreat—By Yourself | Cara Lai

What It’s Like To Do A Year-Long Silent Meditation Retreat—By Yourself | Cara Lai

New episodes come out every Monday, Wednesday, and Friday for free, with 1-week early access for Wondery+ subscribers. --- Cara Lai has worked as an artist, wilderness guide, social worker, and therapist before becoming a full time meditation teacher. She teaches teens and adults at Spirit Rock, Insight Meditation Society, and Ten Percent Happier. To find out more about what Cara does, you can go to her website, www.caralai.org – where she’s got some online meditation classes, including one called Meditate Your Face Off. She also has a monthly class for parents, co-led by Ofosu Jones-Quartey and Jess Morey, both of whom have been heard on this podcast. Speaking of podcasts, Cara also co-hosts a podcast called Adventures in Meditating (For Parents), along with Jess Morey and Jon Roberts. Cara will also be a core teacher for a 14-week residential semester program for youth ages 18-32 this Fall in Marlboro VT. The program is called the Contemplative Semester, and there are many folks who will be teaching who have been in the TPH orbit, including Joseph Goldstein, Sharon Salzberg, Jessica Morey, Kaira Jewel Lingo, and more. You can find more info at www.contemplativesemester.org Related Episodes: The Upside of Desire | Cara Lai  Can You Get Fit Without Self-Loathing? | Cara Lai  Sign up for Dan’s weekly newsletter here Follow Dan on social: Instagram, TikTok Ten Percent Happier online bookstore Subscribe to our YouTube Channel Our favorite playlists on: Anxiety, Sleep, Relationships, Most Popular Episodes Full Shownotes: https://www.tenpercent.com/tph/podcast-episode/cara-lai-808

31 Juli 20241h 17min

How Turning Habits Into Rituals Can Help You At Home, At Work, And When You’re Anxious | Michael Norton

How Turning Habits Into Rituals Can Help You At Home, At Work, And When You’re Anxious | Michael Norton

New episodes come out every Monday, Wednesday, and Friday for free, with 1-week early access for Wondery+ subscribers. A Harvard professor on how to elevate everyday activities in order to lift your mood, improve your relationships and rise to new challenges. Michael Norton is the Harold M. Brierley Professor of Business Administration at the Harvard Business School. He has studied human behavior as it relates to love and inequality, time and money, and happiness and grief. He is the author of The Ritual Effect: From Habit to Ritual, Harness the Surprising Power of Everyday Actions.  In this episode we talk about:  The difference between habits and rituals How rituals impact various spheres of life, including creativity, grief and politics - and how not all rituals are beneficial  how to transform your everyday activities into rituals and how they can inject meaning into your life and give a boost to your relationships How to introduce rituals into your workplace without falling back on cliché (like trust falls) Related Episodes: What Science Says About Money and Happiness | Elizabeth Dunn — Ten Percent Happier  How to Benefit From Religion, Even as a Nonbeliever | David DeSteno — Ten Percent Happier How to Change Your Habits | Katy Milkman — Ten Percent Happier    Sign up for Dan’s weekly newsletter here Follow Dan on social: Instagram, TikTok Ten Percent Happier online bookstore Subscribe to our YouTube Channel Our favorite playlists on: Anxiety, Sleep, Relationships, Most Popular Episodes Full Shownotes: https://www.tenpercent.com/tph/michael-norton/ Additional Resources: Download the Ten Percent Happier app today: https://10percenthappier.app.link/install

29 Juli 20241h 14min

From Ted Talks Daily: The Benefits Of Not Being A Jerk To Yourself

From Ted Talks Daily: The Benefits Of Not Being A Jerk To Yourself

We're introducing you to the Ted Talks Daily podcast, with an episode featuring our own Dan Harris. Here's his TED Talk, "The Benefits Of Not Being A Jerk To Yourself." After over two decades as an anchor for ABC News, an on-air panic attack sent Dan Harris's life in a new direction: he became a dedicated meditator and, to some, even a guru. But then an anonymous survey of his family, friends and colleagues turned up some brutal feedback -- he was still kind of a jerk. In a wise, funny talk, he shares his years-long quest to improve his relationships with everyone (starting with himself) and explains the science behind loving-kindness meditation, and how it can boost your resiliency, quiet your inner critic and simply make you more pleasant to be around.

26 Juli 202414min

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