What Science and Buddhism Say About How to Regulate Your Own Nervous System | Deb Dana & Kaira Jewel Lingo

What Science and Buddhism Say About How to Regulate Your Own Nervous System | Deb Dana & Kaira Jewel Lingo

Is it possible to learn to spot which state your nervous system is in and move from suboptimal states to much better ones? The subject of how to work with your own nervous system is called Polyvagal Theory and today’s guests Deb Dana & Kaira Jewel Lingo will give us a primer on what that exactly means. They will also talk about how our nervous systems are connected to the nervous systems of other people, and how we can learn to co-regulate our systems for the betterment of others.


Deb Dana is a Licensed Clinical Social Worker, who is a clinician, consultant and author specializing in complex trauma. Her work is focused on using the lens of Polyvagal Theory to understand and resolve the impact of trauma, and creating ways of working that honor the role of the autonomic nervous system. She has written several books, including Anchored: How to Befriend Your Nervous System Using Polyvagal Theory.

Kaira Jewel Lingo is a Dharma teacher with a lifelong interest in spirituality and social justice. After living as an ordained nun for 15 years in Thich Nhat Hanh’s monastic community, Kaira Jewel now teaches internationally in the Zen lineage and the Vipassana tradition, as well as in secular mindfulness, with a focus on activists, Black, Indigenous, and People of Color, artists, educators, families, and youth. She is author of We Were Made for These Times: Ten Lessons for Moving Through Change, Loss, and Disruption.

This is the third installment of our series called, The Art and Science of Keeping Your Sh*t Together. In each episode we bring together a meditative adept or Buddhist scholar and a respected scientist. The idea is to give you the best of both worlds to arm you with both modern and ancient tools for regulating your emotions.


In this episode we talk about:

  • The basics of Polyvagal Theory
  • A fascinating and easily graspable concept from Buddhist psychology called, “store consciousness”
  • The interconnectedness of our nervous systems and the responsibility that creates for all of us
  • How to handle being annoyed
  • What happens when we beat ourselves up with “shoulds,” and how to stop doing that
  • The value of simply knowing, in the moments when you’re stuck, that those moments are impermanent
  • How to allow your suffering to inform your life
  • The value of “micro-moments”
  • Two ways of caring for painful states without suppressing them
  • And the power of action and service in overcoming anxiety



Full Shownotes: www.tenpercent.com/podcast-episode/deb-dana-kaira-jewel-lingo-522

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Never Worry Alone | Dr. Robert Waldinger

Never Worry Alone | Dr. Robert Waldinger

Dr. Robert Waldinger talks about his new book The Good Life: Lessons From the World’s Longest Scientific Study of Happiness, which explores lessons from the longest scientific study of happiness. Dr. Robert Waldinger is a professor of psychiatry at Harvard Medical School, the director of the Harvard Study of Adult Development at Massachusetts General Hospital, and co-founder of the Lifespan Research Foundation. He is also a Zen master and teaches meditation in New England and around the world. His TED Talk is one of the most viewed of all time, with over 43 million views. He’s the co-author, along with Dr. Marc Schulz, of The Good Life.   In this episode we talk about:  What the Harvard Study of Adult Development is and how it got started How much of our happiness is really under our control Why you can’t you be happy all the time The concept of “social fitness”  Why you should “never worry alone”  How having best friends at work can make you more productive And why, in his words, it’s never too late to be happy   Join Dan’s online community here Follow Dan on social: Instagram, TikTok Subscribe to our YouTube Channel

28 Apr 1h 3min

Meditate on the Breath (Without Driving Yourself Nuts) | Bonus Meditation with Joseph Goldstein

Meditate on the Breath (Without Driving Yourself Nuts) | Bonus Meditation with Joseph Goldstein

You don’t have to focus too maniacally on your breath; your body is part of the process, too. Our good buddy Joseph Goldstein shows you how to balance.  Joseph Goldstein is a cofounder of the Insight Meditation Society and the Barre Center for Buddhist Studies, both in Barre, Massachusetts. He is the author of many books including, most recently, Dreamscapes of the Mind.  This meditation is part of a new series on the Eightfold Path. The rest of the series is available on Waking Up, a top-notch meditation app with amazing teachers and a ton of courses for all levels. If you subscribe via this link: wakingup.com/tenpercent, you’ll get a 30-day free trial—and you’ll be supporting the 10% Happier team, too. Full and partial scholarships are available.   Sign up for Dan’s newsletter here Follow Dan on social: Instagram, TikTok Subscribe to our YouTube Channel

25 Apr 12min

Status: What It Is, Why It Matters, and How To Get It Without Driving Yourself Crazy | Will Storr

Status: What It Is, Why It Matters, and How To Get It Without Driving Yourself Crazy | Will Storr

Plus more surprising information on this fundamental human drive.   Will Storr is a multi award-winning writer and Sunday Times bestselling author. His latest book is A Story is a Deal: How to use the science of storytelling to lead, motivate and persuade.   Waking Up, a top-notch meditation app with amazing teachers and a ton of courses for all levels. If you subscribe via this link: wakingup.com/tenpercent, you’ll get a 30-day free trial—and you’ll be supporting the 10% Happier team, too. Full and partial scholarships are available. In this episode we talk about: The key elements of a properly deployed story The different ways to measure status The three main ways humans compete for status The benefits of altruism as a source of status The  balance between self interest and altruism  How mindfulness factors into the status drive Managing our relationships with social media Related Episodes: Why You Can’t Pay Attention - And How to Think Deeply Again | Johann Hari   Sign up for Dan’s newsletter here Follow Dan on social: Instagram, TikTok Ten Percent Happier online bookstore Subscribe to our YouTube Channel Our favorite playlists on: Anxiety, Sleep, Relationships, Most Popular Episodes

23 Apr 1h 7min

Stoic Advice for Handling Setbacks, Insults, and Death | William Irvine

Stoic Advice for Handling Setbacks, Insults, and Death | William Irvine

How to boost your psychological immune system, the stoic way.   William “Bill” Irvine is the emeritus professor of philosophy at Wright State University in Dayton, Ohio.  He is the author of eight books that have been translated into more than twenty languages, including Guide to the Good Life: The Ancient Art of Stoic Joy and Stoic Challenge: A Philosopher’s Guide to Becoming Tougher, Calmer, and More Resilient.   Bill is one of many great teachers featured on Waking Up, a top-notch meditation app with amazing teachers and a ton of courses for all levels. If you subscribe via this link: wakingup.com/tenpercent, you’ll get a 30-day free trial—and you’ll be supporting the 10% Happier team, too. Full and partial scholarships are available.   In this episode we talk about: How Bill was first introduced to Stoicism (the story involves a midlife crisis and a banjo.)  The comparison between Stoicism and Buddhism  Psychological strategies for attaining equanimity  The practice of negative visualization Stoic approaches to handling anger and insults How to reframe setbacks as tests Stoicism VS emotional suppression Tools for navigating the challenges of our digital age What Stoics say about pursuing fame and status And why death is the “ultimate exam”   Join Dan’s online community here Follow Dan on social: Instagram, TikTok Subscribe to our YouTube Channel   Additional Resources:  Links to Bill’s Waking Up content Links to Bill’s books

21 Apr 1h 14min

Alisyn Camerota On: Surviving the News, Surviving the Teenage Years, and the Concept of Home

Alisyn Camerota On: Surviving the News, Surviving the Teenage Years, and the Concept of Home

From punk rock to broadcast journalism. A veteran journalist shares her story.   Alisyn Camerota is an award-winning journalist and author. She recently wrote the memoir,  Combat Love: A Story of Leaving, Longing, and Searching for Home.   In this episode we talk about: Our mutual dislike of covering breaking news  How her turbulent teenage years helped her prepare for life’s chaos  What “home” actually means How her childhood informed her own parenting style The delicate balance between giving your children too little or too much freedom What it means for a journalist to center themself in a story  Surviving the news  Coping with anxiety and media consumption And much more     Join Dan’s online community here Follow Dan on social: Instagram, TikTok Subscribe to our YouTube Channel     Additional Resources:  Alisyn Camerota on Substack Sanity Podcast

18 Apr 1h 10min

How To Deal With Difficult Emotions, Difficult Feedback, and Difficult Parts of Your Own Mind | Diane Musho Hamilton

How To Deal With Difficult Emotions, Difficult Feedback, and Difficult Parts of Your Own Mind | Diane Musho Hamilton

Cross-training for your mind. Diane Musho Hamilton is an author, award-winning mediator, and teacher of Zen. She is the author of three books on conflict resolution, relationships, and communication. Her latest book is Waking Up and Growing Up: Spiritual Cross-training for an Evolving World, co-authored with Gabriel Wilson. Diane is one of many great teachers featured on Waking Up, a top-notch meditation app with amazing teachers and a ton of courses for all levels. If you subscribe via this link: wakingup.com/tenpercent, you’ll get a 30-day free trial—and you’ll be supporting the 10% Happier team, too. Full and partial scholarships are available. In this episode we talk about: What Diane means by spiritual cross training and waking up  Cultivating emotional maturity Foundations of Zen practice Integrating shadow and psyche The key aspects of living with purpose  The value of intention setting Ethical action and community Sign up for Dan’s newsletter here Follow Dan on social: Instagram, TikTok Ten Percent Happier online bookstore Subscribe to our YouTube Channel Our favorite playlists on: Anxiety, Sleep, Relationships, Most Popular Episodes   Additional Resources:  Dan’s panic attack on live TV

16 Apr 1h 7min

Sam Harris On: Equanimity in Turbulent Times; Compassion for Difficult People; And Dualistic vs Non-dualistic Mindfulness

Sam Harris On: Equanimity in Turbulent Times; Compassion for Difficult People; And Dualistic vs Non-dualistic Mindfulness

An old friend (and my spiritual brother) discusses some of the most important things he’s ever learned.   Sam Harris is a neuroscientist, author, podcaster and the proprietor of Waking Up, a top-notch meditation app with amazing teachers and a ton of courses for all levels. If you subscribe via this link: wakingup.com/tenpercent, you’ll get a 30-day free trial—and you’ll be supporting the 10% Happier team, too. Full and partial scholarships are available.   In this episode we talk about: How to maintain equanimity in shitty situations  How to have compassion – or at least non-hatred – for people you disagree with politically  The illusion of free will and its relationship with compassion  The difference between dualistic and non-dualistic mindfulness The concept of having no head Why meditating with your eyes open can be super helpful And much more   Join Dan’s online community here Follow Dan on social: Instagram, TikTok Subscribe to our YouTube Channel   Additional Resources:  On Having No Head

14 Apr 1h 32min

Can You Be Kind Without Becoming Boring And/Or Weak? | A Question From “Mean Aunt Kate”

Can You Be Kind Without Becoming Boring And/Or Weak? | A Question From “Mean Aunt Kate”

We’re going to give you a taste of the so-called “renegade sangha” sessions on DanHarris.com, which is powered by Substack. In those sessions, Dan usually guides a meditation and then takes questions.    In this brief episode, you’re going to hear one of the best, funniest, most relatable questions we have received to date.   Sign up for Dan’s newsletter here Follow Dan on social: Instagram, TikTok Ten Percent Happier online bookstore Subscribe to our YouTube Channel Our favorite playlists on: Anxiety, Sleep, Relationships, Most Popular Episodes

11 Apr 9min

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