How Not to Ruin Your Relationships | Drs. John & Julie Gottman

New episodes come out every Monday, Wednesday, and Friday for free, with 1-week early access for Wondery+ subscribers. --- The four rules for a meaningful conversation, when to be vulnerable, and how to form the habits of becoming a supercommunicator. Charles Duhigg is a Pulitzer Prize–winning journalist and author of the bestselling The Power of Habit and Smarter Faster Better. His new book is called Supercommunicators. In this episode we talk about: How he defines super communicator  The four rules for a meaningful conversation  How and when to deploy vulnerability  How to transform shallow questions into deep ones The fast friends procedure  And how to form the habits of becoming a supercommunicator  Related Episodes: Dan Clurman and Mudita Nisker on communication Daniel Goleman on emotional intelligence and optimal performance Sign up for Dan’s weekly newsletter here Follow Dan on social: Instagram, TikTok Ten Percent Happier online bookstore Subscribe to our YouTube Channel Our favorite playlists on: Anxiety, Sleep, Relationships, Most Popular Episodes For tickets to Dan Harris: Celebrating 10 Years of 10% Happier at Symphony Space: click here Full Shownotes: https://www.tenpercent.com/tph/podcast-episode/charles-duhigg Additional Resources: Download the Ten Percent Happier app today: https://10percenthappier.app.link/install

21 Feb 20241h 8min

New episodes come out every Monday, Wednesday, and Friday for free, with 1-week early access for Wondery+ subscribers. --- How to cultivate a generosity mindset— and make a good thing less boring. Chris Anderson is the curator of TED. He is the author of New York Times bestseller TED Talks and has overseen the introduction of, among others, the TEDx program, the TED-Ed initiative, and the Audacious Project, a bold new philanthropic model to inspire change at scale. His newest book, Infectious Generosity: The Ultimate Idea Worth Spreading, is out now.  In this episode we talk about: How to create a generosity mindset The audacious and daunting goal he recommends for annual giving And the promise of the Internet as a tool to dramatically amplify human kindness Related Episodes: Adam Grant, The Benefits of Generosity Generosity | Bonus Talk with Norman Fischer For tickets to Dan Harris: Celebrating 10 Years of 10% Happier at Symphony Space: click here Sign up for Dan’s weekly newsletter here Follow Dan on social: Instagram, TikTok Ten Percent Happier online bookstore Subscribe to our YouTube Channel Our favorite playlists on: Anxiety, Sleep, Relationships, Most Popular Episodes Full Shownotes: https://www.tenpercent.com/tph/podcast-episode/chris-anderson

19 Feb 20241h 13min

Three tools for living a “passion-struck” life. John R Miles is a former naval officer and corporate titan who has made it his business to study what it means to find passion and purpose in your life. He is the host of the Passion Struck Podcast and the author of the new book Passion Struck: Twelve Powerful Principles to Unlock Your Purpose and Ignite Your Most Intentional Life. In this episode we talk about: A visualization technique for setting your priorities Why “autopilot” is the wrong metaphor for an unlived life The five “transition points” on “the journey to becoming passion struck”  Sign up for Dan’s weekly newsletter here Follow Dan on social: Instagram, TikTok Ten Percent Happier online bookstore Subscribe to our YouTube Channel Our favorite playlists on: Anxiety, Sleep, Relationships, Most Popular Episodes Full Shownotes: https://www.tenpercent.com/tph/podcast-episode/john-r-miles

16 Feb 20249min

New episodes come out every Monday, Wednesday, and Friday for free, with 1-week early access for Wondery+ subscribers. --- A master class in equanimity. It’s the latest installment of our Meditation Party series. Live from Omega. Sebene Selassie describes herself as a “writer, teacher, and immigrant-weirdo.” She teaches meditation on the Ten Percent Happier app and is the author of a great book called You Belong. She’s based in Brooklyn.  Jeff Warren is also a writer and a meditation teacher. He and Dan co-wrote the book, Meditation for Fidgety Skeptics. He also hosts the Consciousness Explorers podcast. He’s based in Toronto.  Tickets for the two more Meditation Party retreats this year at the Omega Institute in Rhinebeck, New York are available now. The last one was a blast. Come join us for both. One is in May, the other October.  For tickets to Dan Harris: Celebrating 10 Years of 10% Happier at Symphony Space: click here Related Episodes: Meditation Party: The “Sh*t Is Fertilizer” Edition | Sebene Selassie & Jeff Warren Meditation Party with Sebene Selassie and Jeff Warren: Psychedelics, ADHD, Waking Up From Distraction, and Singing Without Being Self-Conscious Meditation Party: Magic, Mystery, Intuition, Tattoos, and Non-Efforting | Sebene Selassie and Jeff Warren Nirvana | Joseph Goldstein  A More Relaxed Way to Meditate | Alexis Santos  Sign up for Dan’s weekly newsletter here Follow Dan on social: Instagram, TikTok Ten Percent Happier online bookstore Subscribe to our YouTube Channel Our favorite playlists on: Anxiety, Sleep, Relationships, Most Popular Episodes Full Shownotes: https://www.tenpercent.com/tph/podcast-episode/medparty-omega

14 Feb 202447min

New episodes come out every Monday, Wednesday, and Friday for free, with 1-week early access for Wondery+ subscribers. --- Simple tools you can knit into your life both for when you’re actively freaking out, and for preventing future trips down the anxiety toilet.  Dr. Jenny Taitz is a clinical psychologist and an assistant clinical professor in psychiatry at the University of California, Los Angeles. Dr. Taitz completed her fellowship in psychology at Yale University School of Medicine and achieved board certifications in both cognitive behavioral therapy and dialectical behavior therapy. Her new book, Stress Resets: How to Soothe Your Body and Mind in Minutes, is out now.  In this episode we talk about: The difference between stress and anxiety Jenny’s take on the use of benzodiazepines What she means by, “negative core beliefs”, and how to untangle ourselves from them How to prepare in advance for stressful situations The benefit of giving yourself a deliberate panic attack And why stress, while uncomfortable, is actually part of a healthy and meaningful life Additional Links:  How to Be Single and Happy by Dr. Jenny Taitz Breathe • Calm down • Meditate  Three-Minute Breathing Space Related Episodes: Can Anxiety Be a Gift? | Dr. David Rosmarin Zach Braff On: Anxiety, Sobriety, Insomnia, Grief, Social Media, and the Meaning of the Tattoo on His Wrist For tickets to Dan Harris: Celebrating 10 Years of 10% Happier at Symphony Space: click here Sign up for Dan’s weekly newsletter here Follow Dan on social: Instagram, TikTok Ten Percent Happier online bookstore Subscribe to our YouTube Channel Our favorite playlists on: Anxiety, Sleep, Relationships, Most Popular Episodes Full Shownotes: https://www.tenpercent.com/tph/podcast-episode/jenny-taitz-730

12 Feb 20241h 6min

Conflict doesn’t have to suck. These iconic relationship researchers tell us how.  Fight Right: How Successful Couples Turn Conflict Into Connection is the name of a new book by esteemed guests Dr. John Gottman and Dr. Julie Gottman. They are the co-Founders of The Gottman Institute and have completed over 40 years of research with more than 3,000 couples. John is the researcher; Julie the clinician. They have written several books together, including Eight Dates and The Love Prescription. Even though the majority of the Gottmans’ research is on couples, the advice is applicable to all types of relationships.   In this episode we talk about: The three principle conflict styles Why we often don’t understand what it is we’re fighting about Perpetual problems vs. Solvable problems Why the first three minutes of an argument are key  The simple sentence to use at the beginning of an argument How to downregulate defensiveness in an argument Why the Gottmans’ believe there is no such thing as constructive criticism Why apologizing quickly isn’t always the right move When a fight might spell the end  Related Episodes: Dan Savage on how to handle disappointment in your relationships, how to get better at sex, and why “a couple” is an Illusion Lori Brotto on mindful sex Devon and Craig Hase on how not to be a hot mess Myisha Battle on love, sex, dating, and relationship myths Sign up for Dan’s weekly newsletter here Follow Dan on social: Instagram, TikTok Ten Percent Happier online bookstore Subscribe to our YouTube Channel Our favorite playlists on: Anxiety, Sleep, Relationships, Most Popular Episodes For tickets to Dan Harris: Celebrating 10 Years of 10% Happier at Symphony Space: click here Full Shownotes: http://tenpercent.com/tph/podcast-episode/gottmans-726

5 Feb 20241h 6min

New episodes come out every Monday, Wednesday, and Friday for free, with 1-week early access for Wondery+ subscribers. --- We’re dropping a fun little treat in your feed today: it’s an episode of The Puzzler, a new podcast from writer A.J. Jacobs, who was my guest on Ten Percent Happier at the beginning of December. His new book, also called The Puzzler, is all about his exploration of the world of puzzles – everything from word games to jigsaw puzzles to Sudoku and beyond – and how what he calls “the puzzle mindset” can really improve your life. So then he asked me to be his guest on The Puzzler, a daily podcast that he hosts, with so-called “celebrity” guests trying to do puzzles. I’ve said before that I’m not really a puzzle guy, but A.J. is a delight and it was a lot of fun getting to be on his show – and that’s the episode we’re sharing with you today. You can find “The Puzzler with A.J. Jacobs” wherever you get your podcasts. And thanks, A.J., for having me.  Sign up for Dan’s weekly newsletter here Follow Dan on social: Instagram, TikTok Ten Percent Happier online bookstore Subscribe to our YouTube Channel Our favorite playlists on: Anxiety, Sleep, Relationships, Most Popular Episodes For tickets to Dan Harris: Celebrating 10 Years of 10% Happier at Symphony Space: click here Additional Resources: Download the Ten Percent Happier app today: https://10percenthappier.app.link/install

2 Feb 202413min