Modern Life Numbs You. Here’s The Neuroscience Of Waking Up | Tali Sharot

Modern Life Numbs You. Here’s The Neuroscience Of Waking Up | Tali Sharot

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It’s so easy, especially these days, to numb out. To get bored. To move through life on autopilot. There is even a scientific term for this: habituation.

Today we’re talking to a researcher who co-authored a new book about the neuroscience of habit and how to wake up again. To make things exciting. Or as she says, to “re-sparkle”.

Tali Sharot is a professor of cognitive neuroscience at University College London and MIT. She’s written several books including The Optimism Bias and The Influential Mind. Her latest, co-written with Cass Sunstein, is called Look Again: The Power of Noticing What Was Always There.


In this episode we talk about:

  • What habituation is and what’s going on in the brain when it happens
  • How it negatively impacts the joy we feel in life – and inversely – how it can make us stop noticing the bad stuff
  • Key strategies for disrupting habituation and introducing change and variety into your life
  • The interesting relationship between creativity and people who habituate slowly
  • How habituation impacts our relationships
  • Why it’s important to break up the good experiences, but swallow the bad whole.
  • How to wake up from a “technologically induced coma”
  • How people emotionally habituate to dishonesty and lying
  • And lastly, we talk about the dangers of habituating to a slow, incremental rise in tyranny – and how dis-habituation entrepreneurs can help


Related Episodes:

#345 How to Change Your Habits | Katy Milkman

How Turning Habits Into Rituals Can Help You At Home, At Work, And When You’re Anxious | Michael Norton

Making and Breaking Habits, Sanely | Kelly McGonigal


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Full Shownotes: https://happierapp.com/podcast/tph/tali-sharot-828


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The Self-Interested Case for Examining Your Biases | John Biewen

The Self-Interested Case for Examining Your Biases | John Biewen

Too often, the process of looking at your biases can be presented like eating your vegetables. But one of the most fascinating and rewarding things I have attempted to do in recent years is to take a good, hard look at my own prejudices and conditioning, especially as a white man. I still screw up all the time. However, one thing that I think is often underplayed is that doing this work can be deeply enjoyable–and can also pay profound dividends.  One of my most important role models here has been John Biewen, host of a podcast called Scene on Radio. The show has had four seasons, but the seasons that have most impacted me are Seasons 2 and 3. Season 2 is called “Seeing White,” in which he explores white people and whiteness. Season 3 is called “Men,” in which he looks at sexism. I was not surprised to learn that John is a meditator, a practice which, he explains, has helped him as he’s done his work. Also: We're offering 40% off the price of an annual subscription to our companion meditation app–also called Ten Percent Happier–for our podcast listeners. We don’t do discounts of this size all the time, and of course nothing is permanent—so get this deal before it ends on April 1st by going to https://www.tenpercent.com/march.  And here’s a link to this weekend's Love & Resilience Summit, where I'll be presenting: https://promo.lionsroar.com/contemplative-care-summit-register/ Full Shownotes: https://www.tenpercent.com/podcast-episode/john-biewen-333

24 Mars 20211h 2min

The Profound Upside of Self-Diminishment | George Saunders

The Profound Upside of Self-Diminishment | George Saunders

There is a powerful scene in a novel called Lincoln In the Bardo, where President Abraham Lincoln has come to the cemetery where his young son, Willie, is soon to be buried. Willie had passed away at the White House where he had gotten sick. Lincoln is so distraught that he goes to the graveyard to get one last glimpse at his boy’s dead body. As the President is leaving, and in the grips of perhaps the worst psychic pain available to any human, he has an insight. His suffering, he realizes, comes from viewing his son as solid, when, in fact, they are both just “energy bursts” or “two passing temporarinesses.”  There is a reason this insight will be familiar to anyone with a passing familiarity with Buddhism, and that is because the author, George Saunders, is a practicing Buddhist. Lincoln in the Bardo won the 2017 Man Booker Prize for best work of fiction in English. Saunders has written ten other books, including the newly released A Swim in a Pond in the Rain, which is about how to become a better reader and that can tell us about how to live. This was an enormously valuable conversation for me, both as a meditator and as an author (because he has many, deeply useful thoughts about the craft). We talk about many things here, including: the “unified theory of brain,” how writing resembles meditation, his speculations about the afterlife, and a speech he gave on kindness that went viral.  Another order of business: In response to our ever-changing reality, we’ve done our best to use this podcast to help you figure out how to navigate our world. And as you know, the practice of meditation undergirds nearly all of the practical takeaways you hear us discuss on this podcast. Many of our podcast guests have also contributed to our companion meditation app, which is also called Ten Percent Happier. Our app helps you understand both how to practice meditation and how meditation can help you navigate our ever-changing world. We hope that you'll subscribe to our app to learn how to care for yourself and others during crises (which are, after all, inevitable).  To make it easier, we're offering 40% off the price of an annual subscription for our podcast listeners. We don’t do discounts of this size all the time, and of course nothing is permanent—so get this deal before it ends on April 1st by going to https://www.tenpercent.com/march. And here’s a link to Love & Resilience: The Contemplative Care Summit (March 25 - 29). And finally, be sure to check out The Science of Happiness podcast, available here and wherever you get your podcasts.  Full Shownotes: https://www.tenpercent.com/podcast-episode/george-saunders-332

22 Mars 20211h 8min

How to Understand Oneness | Roshi Norma Wong

How to Understand Oneness | Roshi Norma Wong

Today we’re diving into a concept that is simultaneously one of the oldest contemplative cliches and one of the most profound head scratchers — oneness. Can *you* be one with everything if *you* don’t really exist? And, even if we manage to grok this idea, what are the practical ramifications? Actually, this is just one of the many riddles and paradoxes we’ll be exploring today.  My guest is Roshi Norma Wong. She was recommended to us by frequent guest and friend of TPH, The Reverend angel Kyodo Williams. Roshi Norma is a Zen Master, a life-long resident of Hawaii, a former State legislator, and abbot of a Zen temple called Anko-in. In this conversation, we talk about: • Understanding -- and experiencing -- oneness • Removing the binary between relaxation and focus • Why she thinks we need to cultivate pride and humility simultaneously • Why she thinks that before we try to solve the world’s problems, we need to become better people • And why our current moment of compounding global catastrophes presents us with an unprecedented opportunity Speaking of transformation in the face of crisis, we’ve always done our best to use this podcast as a place to figure out how to navigate our ever-shifting world. Over the last year, for example, we’ve spoken with experts about how to cope with the coronavirus, from dealing with anxiety and grief to parenting in a pandemic to worries about money. The practice of meditation undergirds all of the practical takeaways you hear us discuss on this podcast–and many of our podcast guests have contributed to our companion meditation app. Our app helps you understand both how to practice meditation and how meditation can help you navigate our ever-changing world. We hope that you'll subscribe to our app to learn how to care for yourself and others during crises (which are, after all, inevitable).  To make it easier, we're offering 40% off the price of an annual subscription for our podcast listeners. We don’t do discounts of this size all the time, and of course nothing is permanent—so get this deal before it ends on April 1st by going to www.tenpercent.com/march, for 40% off your subscription. Full Shownotes: https://www.tenpercent.com/podcast-episode/roshi-norma-wong-331

17 Mars 202157min

How This Plague Ends (and What It Tells Us About Human Nature) | Nicholas Christakis

How This Plague Ends (and What It Tells Us About Human Nature) | Nicholas Christakis

We all remember that fateful week, almost exactly a year ago, when it all seemed to sink in for so many of us–when Tom Hanks got sick, the NBA suspended games, and the (now former) President addressed the nation in primetime. The big question now is: When and how will this plague end?  My guest today has a clear vision for how things are likely to play out from from here. His name is Dr. Nicholas Christakis. He’s a physician, sociologist, and director of the Human Nature Lab at Yale University. He’s written a number of books, but there are two that we will discuss in this episode. His latest is called Apollo's Arrow: The Profound and Enduring Impact of Coronavirus on the Way We Live. The other book we’re going to talk about is on a related subject. It’s called Blueprint: The Evolutionary Origins of a Good Society. In it, Christakis argues that human beings are fundamentally good. In fact, as you will hear, it is our goodness that the virus exploits.  One more order of business: when COVID began affecting our lives, most of us were in immediate crisis, wondering about the answers to very basic questions: How do I get food safely? How do I care for my children and/or do my job under less-than-ideal circumstances? Will my loved ones and I be safe? In response to our changing reality, we’ve used this podcast to help you figure out how to navigate our new world. We’ve spoken with experts about how to cope with this crisis, from dealing with anxiety and grief to parenting in a pandemic to worries about money. As you know, the practice of meditation undergirds all of the practical takeaways you hear us discuss on this podcast–and as you may or may not know, many of our podcast guests have contributed to our companion meditation app. We hope that you'll subscribe to the Ten Percent Happier app to learn how to care for yourself and others during crises (which are, after all, inevitable). To make it easier, we're offering 40% off the price of an annual subscription for our podcast listeners. We don’t do discounts of this size all the time, and of course nothing is permanent—so get this deal before it ends on April 1st by going to to https://www.tenpercent.com/march for 40% off your subscription. Full Shownotes: https://www.tenpercent.com/podcast-episode/nicholas-christakis-330

15 Mars 20211h 3min

How to Break Your Anxiety Habit | Judson Brewer

How to Break Your Anxiety Habit | Judson Brewer

To mark the first anniversary of the week in March 2020 when Covid fundamentally altered our lives, we’re launching a special two-part series. Today, we’re going to be talking about anxiety, which has been spiking during the pandemic. My guest is Dr. Jud Brewer, a psychiatrist and deep dharma practitioner who argues that anxiety is a habit–one that you can unwind. Then, next Monday, we’ll talk to Nicholas Christakis, who is not only a doctor but also the head of the Human Nature Lab at Yale, about when the pandemic will end, and what this ordeal has revealed about our species. But today it’s anxiety with Jud Brewer. Some of you may know Jud from the Ten Percent Happier app, where he teaches a mindful eating course. He’s also been on this show several times. He is the Director of Research and Innovation at the Mindfulness Center at Brown University. He’s got a number of apps that use mindfulness to treat addiction, including Eat Right Now, Craving to Quit, and Unwinding Anxiety. He also has a brand new book, called Unwinding Anxiety. In this interview, we talk about: how exactly mindfulness can be harnessed to deal with anxiety; what is anxiety anyway, and why does he view it as a habit? And we publicly debate something we have been privately discussing: Is there any level of stress or anxiety that is healthy? One more thing: We are looking for a podcast marketer. If you love this show, marketing, and building relationships, we would love to have you on the team to help us grow Ten Percent Happier and our future shows. Please apply at https://www.tenpercent.com/careers. Full Shownotes: https://www.tenpercent.com/podcast-episode/judson-brewer-329

10 Mars 20211h 11min

A Conversation about Abuse, Agency, and Mindfulness | Tanya Selvaratnam

A Conversation about Abuse, Agency, and Mindfulness | Tanya Selvaratnam

Before we dive in, a warning: this conversation includes descriptions of abuse and violence. As you may know, March 8th, the day we’re dropping this episode, is International Women’s Day. We have a story today about intimate violence, which has long been a problem for women around the world, and has only intensified during the pandemic. My guest is Tanya Selvaratnam, a writer and artist who I’ve known socially for many, many years. I was truly shocked when Tanya’s name surfaced in the media three years ago, in connection with the case of Eric Schneiderman. Eric was the celebrated Attorney General of New York State. He was also a regular on the local meditation scene. I knew Eric and Tanya were dating. What I did not know was that, behind the scenes, Eric was allegedly physically and emotionally abusing Tanya. She has now come out with a book, called Assume Nothing, which goes into searing detail about not only the alleged abuse, but also about how she flipped the script, regained her agency, helped bring her alleged abuser down, and how she has healed subsequently -- in no small part through meditation and therapy. Please note: If you or someone you know is suffering from abuse, you can find resources curated by Tanya at the “full shownotes” link below. We’d also like to provide more context about the allegations Tanya shares in this interview: When the allegations of abuse against New York Attorney General Eric Schneiderman by Tanya and three other women were first made public in The New Yorker in May 2018, Schneiderman quickly resigned. In a statement at the time, he said, “serious allegations, which I strongly contest, have been made against me.” He also said, “While these allegations are unrelated to my professional conduct or the operations of the office, they will effectively prevent me from leading the office’s work at this critical time. I therefore resign my office.” After a six-month investigation, prosecutors declined to bring criminal charges against Schneiderman, citing legal impediments, including statutes of limitations. But the district attorney assigned to the case by Governor Andrew Cuomo also said that she “believed the women who shared their experiences” with investigators. In response, Schneiderman said, "I recognize that District Attorney Singas' decision not to prosecute does not mean I have done nothing wrong. I accept full responsibility for my conduct in my relationships with my accusers, and for the impact it had on them." I should also note that our team reached out to Eric Schneiderman and that he declined to comment for this episode. Two more items: First, remember to check out “In Plain Sight: Lady Bird Johnson,” a new podcast from ABC News, on Apple Podcasts (https://apple.co/ladybird), Spotify (https://spoti.fi/3ukYgoq), or wherever you’re listening now. Finally, we are looking for a podcast marketer at Ten Percent Happier. If you love this show, marketing, and building relationships, we would love to have you on the team to help us grow Ten Percent Happier and our future shows. Please apply at https://www.tenpercent.com/careers. Full Shownotes: https://www.tenpercent.com/podcast-episode/tanya-selvaratnam-328

8 Mars 202146min

Uprooting Your Delusions | Andrea Fella

Uprooting Your Delusions | Andrea Fella

I know you guys, and it is pretty clear you love deep dharma episodes. Today we’ve got a dharma episode that is quite timely. As you all know, we live in a time when most people are getting their news from carefully curated information silos. As a result, we often create very specific views— about public figures, current events, our fellow citizens — and we can cling pretty tightly to those views. Today we’re gonna talk about how useful and even pleasurable it can be to dig into the roots of these biases and dismantle them— to pop our bubbles of delusion. It can be a relief. It can be eye-opening. It can change the way you relate to yourself and to other people. My guest is Andrea Fella. She is the co-teacher at the Insight Meditation Center and the Insight Retreat Center in Redwood City, California. She has been practicing Insight Meditation since 1996, and teaching Insight Meditation since 2003. She is particularly drawn to intensive retreat practice, and has done a number of long retreats, both in the United States and in Burma. During one long practice period in Burma, she ordained as a nun. Also: We are looking for a podcast marketer! If you love this show, marketing, and building relationships, we would love to have you on the team to help us grow Ten Percent Happier and our future shows. Please apply at https://www.tenpercent.com/careers. And don’t forget to check out the new ABC podcast In Plain Sight: Lady Bird Johnson, which you can find here: https://abcaudio.com/podcasts/in-plain-sight/ Full Shownotes: https://www.tenpercent.com/podcast-episode/andrea-fella-327

3 Mars 20211h 10min

How to Make a Masterpiece | Pete Docter

How to Make a Masterpiece | Pete Docter

We’re all creatives, whether we think of ourselves that way or not. In so many aspects of your life, from planning your future to planning a meal to curating your social media, you need to be able to both envision and then execute. And how you work with your mind in these moments is key. Today, we are going to hear from a master creator -- the mind behind brilliant Pixar movies such as Inside Out, Up, and the recently-released Soul -- about how to run a creative process at the highest possible level. (I have a six-year-old, and, in my opinion, one of the worst parts of the job of being a dad is sitting through insipid children's entertainment. But the aforementioned films have been both thrilling and moving to consume, for both me and my son.) My guest today is Pete Docter, who directed all three of those films. He is the Chief Creative Officer of Pixar. He is also a meditator and a practicing Christian whose films are each motivated by a big, pressing question he is posing to himself about his own life. In this conversation, he takes us inside the making of his films, most notably Soul, for which he and his team had to invent a coherent metaphysical scheme to explain both the afterlife -- and the before. We also talk about how his spiritual practices support his storytelling endeavors, and how to power through the pain, frustration, and embarrassment of trying to make something truly original. One more thing: We would appreciate it if you could take a few minutes to help us out by answering a survey about your experience with this podcast. Our team here cares deeply about you, our listeners, and we are always looking for ways to improve. Please go to https://www.tenpercent.com/survey. And thank you. Full Shownotes: https://www.tenpercent.com/podcast-episode/pete-docter-326

1 Mars 202146min

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