How Soon Is Now? The Future May Kill Us

The ¡Ay, Jorge! podcast returns for another season of Jorge interviews with Rita, his 90 year-old Cuban mom. This season takes a deeper dive into their family's exile and subsequent life in the United States. Rita looks back on Cuban history, key relationships, and the lessons of a life well-lived despite political and personal turmoil. Jorge, as ever, tries his very best to distract her with talk of Elon Musk vs. Jeff Bezos rocketry, and assorted allusions to last season's profanities. Season 2, Episode 1 is devoted to Jorge's father, José Agustín Navarro, otherwise known as 'El Capitán.' A member of the CIA-backed La Brigada, the Captain's life was never the same after the ill-fated Bay of Pigs invasion. A former Havana politician, and son of Batista's Chief of Staff, he had lived quite the charmed life before Castro's revolution. Sadly, like many of his generation, the allure of his past could not withstand the harsh reality of life upon realizing that there'd be no returning to the Cuba that once was.

31 Dec 202136min

The ¡Ay, Jorge! Cuban Cowboys' podcast wraps up its first season with the long-awaited 'Who Would You Make a Baby With?' championship round, pitting the #MeToo addled Plácido Domingo against former U.S. President/actor Ronald Reagan AND Bonzo, his TV chimp and co-star. Rita follows up her decision with her thoughts on the future, and what she'd like to see for her grand-children, Joaquín and Elena.

4 Juli 202132min

"The Who Would You Make a Baby With?" segment has officially run amok. It's bad enough that my 89-year-old mom, in the previous episode's quarterfinal, AGAIN chose Ronald Reagan -- with his pet chimp Bonzo no less! -- over the likes of a young Che Guevara, and Mark Harmon; but to have her seemingly gloss over the studly and treacherous accomplishments of a Jeff Bezos or Vladimir Putin, while also flatly rejecting the volcanic, smoldering sexiness of Bernie Sanders...this, THIS, dear listeners, was almost too much to bear! Season 1's penultimate episode results in semifinal, as one lucky Baby-Maker is chosen to face the vaunted Reagan and Bonzo in order to determine who goes up against pre-selected (by Rita, of course) Placido Domingo in the final episode. Who's it gonna be, folks? Elon 'imma tweet about Crypto' Musk? Pope 'perhaps I should apologize for the Church's role in the murder of hundreds of Native American children in Canada' Francis? Augusto Pinochet? Or the aforementioned hotty, Bernie Sanders? Rita's got some tough choices to make because these guys gots game!

6 Juni 202128min

What do Che Guevara, Ronald Reagan, John F. Kennedy and Mark Harmon have in common? I'll tell you! At one point during this podcast's first season, my 89-year-old mom chose each of these men as sexual partners during the "Who Would you Make a Baby With?" segment of our show. Che beat out Nikita Krushchev, Reagan (AND his chimp, Bonzo) handily won over the young newlyweds Jimmy and Rosalynn Carter -- that's right, my mom chose an actor with a monkey over another future President and dignified humanitarian. That was back in Episode 2, where Rita hilariously first uttered the words "I'd tie the monkey down." THIS episode is something of a retrospective disguised as a playoff. Our listeners have spoken (loudly), demanding to know which one would Rita choose from all the men she's, um, loved before (thinking of the the Willie Nelson/Julio Iglesias ballad, except this one's inverse a la Willy Chirino/Dwight Yoakum! Well, maybe not, but either way, ya'll want a Baby Making Champion we gonna crown a Baby Making Champion!). In this episode, Che, Ronnie, JFK, and Marky Mark Harmon go up against each other in what could be described as a quarterfinal. Jorge prods Rita into discussing the pros/cons of each baby maker with the occasional detour into Communist Cuba's failed agricultural policies and good, ol' equity-slash-inclusion ("Why no Asians or people of darker colors??"). The winner will go on to compete against the upcoming (Episode 11) quarterfinal winner. Whoever Rita chooses in this episode will go on to face one of the following great men: Pope Francis, Augusto Pinochet, Elon Musk or Bernie Sanders. Get your headphones on and bring your A-Game. Rita's ready to make some babies!

24 Maj 202128min

At long last: The "Communism" episode! Rita goes off on her progressive, possibly socialist son (um, that's me, your host), providing an in-depth origin story of communism in Cuba. While there's no Marvel Universe Thanos, there are quite a few interesting characters and moments discussed. From Fabio Grobart -- the infamous "Man With Three Names" - to a young, impressionable Fidel Castro, all the way up to last week's Raul Castro retirement, with a whole lotta guns, poverty and outrage in between. To Rita, the U.S. embargo against Cuba is far less damaging to her home country's people that the political system in place. To U.S. politicians, particularly Presidential candidates, the mere mention of the word "Communism" (or "Socialism" for that matter) is enough to sway Cuban and many other Latino voters to go Republican. Anything, it seems, even oligarchy, is preferable to what went down in Cuba and other parts of South- and Central America. Is the United States at least partially to blame for what went- and goes down (re: years of political and economic destabilization, drugs, right-wing death squads, chimichangas ... just kidding on that last one...only that last one)?? Hell yes! Does it matter to Rita? Hell no! Well ... ok .. maybe a little. Listen for yourself and tell me what you think. This week's "Who Would You Make a Baby With?" segment pits none other than Russia's Most Sexiest Man, Vladimir Putin against a young, frazzled but righteous Bernie Sanders. Rita was, understandably, appalled by the choice, but, goodness, choose she did!

24 Apr 202137min

Mortality can be weird, as an actuality, topic and otherwise. My mom took a spill on the first night of her visit, here in San Francisco. We recorded this episode in my kitchen, mere steps away from where she'd fallen earlier in the week. The episode (heh) inspired the topic -- as we discuss mortality from the perspective of an 89 year-old that's outlived all but one of her friends, and this here 55 year-old who can see the end so to speak. Listen as Rita describes what she believes happens when people die, some of her experiences with death, as well as some random thoughts on Catholicism, Christianity and sexuality. Speaking of sexuality (with a dollop of religiosity and papacy!), this episode's "Who Would You Make a Baby With?" segment forces Rita to choose between a young Jesuit priest from Argentina (Jorge Mario Borgoglio, now known as Pope Francis) and the young, strapping Pole, Karol Josef Wostyla (who grew up to be Pope John Paul II). The "catch" - or consequence -- along with making love with a future Pope: her choice's pastoral career will be derailed. But, hey, near-papal baby!

24 Mars 202131min

This episode features Rita recounting her own Cuban exile experience against the larger backdrop of the United States' twisted, contradictory, arbitrary and oft-cruel immigration policy. Led Zeppelin's Immigrant Song never rang so true. Neither has Cypress Hill's Insane in the Membrane for that matter! The picture you see here is of my namesake's press conference, upon docking in Newport News after sailing a Cuban freighter from Havana and requesting political asylum. He was granted asylum by then-Attorney General Bobby Kennedy, on the condition that the ship and its sugar cargo be returned to Castro's Cuba. Aside 1: My namesake is the thin guy in the light colored suit, hair slicked back, hands between his legs. Aside 2: there's an inordinate, disturbing number of weird looking ears in that pic! What's up with that? In any case, Miami has been something of an immigration epicenter; from at least 3 waves of Cuban exiles through several waves of natural disaster- and political turmoil-related exiles, one can start to see patterns of preference, power and privilege. Listen and learn why! This week's "Who Would You Make a Baby With?" is all about right-wing, murderous strongmen! Rita is forced to choose between notorious Chilean dictator Augusto Pinochet or Spain's ultra-Nationalist, possibly fascist Generalissimo Francisco Franco. Listen as she wrestles with history and her conscience in making her choice!

14 Mars 202133min