Stoic Advice for Handling Setbacks, Insults, and Death | William Irvine

Can you become happier, more balanced, and practice equanimity without losing your edge?  Guest Kamala Masters was one of the teachers at Dan’s first ever meditation retreat. In this episode she dives into how to develop equanimity and shares her story of learning how to practice meditation during her everyday life while raising three children on her own.  Kamala Masters has been meditating since the 1970s, first with Anagarika Munindra, who was Joseph Goldstein’s first teacher, and then with the Burmese master Sayadaw U Pandita with whom she twice temporarily ordained as a Buddhist nun. More recently, she’s been training with another Burmese master we’ve talked about here on the show, Sayadaw U Tejaniya. She is a Guiding Teacher at the Insight Meditation Society, and the co-founder of the Vipassana Metta Foundation, which developed the Maui Dharma Sanctuary. In this conversation we talk about:  What is equanimity? The most common misconception about equanimity The near and far enemies of equanimity  The power and limitations of setting intentions Full Shownotes: https://www.tenpercent.com/podcast-episode/kamala-masters-442

20 Apr 202258min

New episodes come out every Monday, Wednesday, and Friday for free, with 1-week early access for Wondery+ subscribers. --- Why is it that many men seem unenthusiastic about discussing body image issues?  We take a deep dive into this topic with Aaron Flores, a Los Angeles-based registered dietician and nutritionist, and one of the few men very active in the space of intuitive eating. Aaron talks about how capitalism ties our weight to our worthiness, and his notion that “our body is not a project.”  In this episode we also discuss:  What intuitive eating is How men experience body image issues, and why they often don’t talk about it  The relationship between diet culture and capitalism  What “health at every size” means and why it’s sometimes controversial Guidelines for parents  The role of self-compassion when it comes to food  Full Shownotes: https://www.tenpercent.com/podcast-episode/aaron-flores-441

18 Apr 20221h 1min

New episodes come out every Monday, Wednesday, and Friday for free, with 1-week early access for Wondery+ subscribers. --- Many of us find our minds flitting all over the place, in meditation and elsewhere. In today’s episode we’re going to learn practical techniques for boosting concentration on and off the cushion. This is the second episode in a two-part series on focus we are airing this week. Today’s guest is an Olympic-level concentrator who has tons of tips for staying focused. We also talk about one of the more exotic meditation subjects: The altered states of consciousness called the jhanas that are available to advanced meditators who can attain deep states of concentration.  Shaila Catherine is the founder of Insight Meditation South Bay, a meditation group in Silicon Valley. She has been practicing meditation since 1980 and has more than nine years of accumulated silent retreat experience. She’s the author of Focused and Fearless: A Meditator’s Guide to States of Deep Joy, Calm, and Clarity. In this conversation, we talk about: The basic building blocks of concentration in a meditation practice Cultivating the right attitude for meditation The difference between concentration and mindfulness Whether ‘jhana’ states are attainable for regular people Full Shownotes: https://www.tenpercent.com/podcast-episode/shaila-catherine-repost-348

13 Apr 20221h 10min

New episodes come out every Monday, Wednesday, and Friday for free, with 1-week early access for Wondery+ subscribers. --- What is it about modern life that is completely disrupting our ability to focus, and how much of it is our fault?    Turns out, not a lot. A number of factors from technology to our sleep habits, and even air pollution, play a role in what causes us to have about the same attention regulation skills as a kitten. In this first episode of our two-part series on focus, guest Johann Hari breaks down why our ability to pay attention is collapsing, and what we can do about it.    Johann Hari is the author of Stolen Focus: Why You Can’t Pay Attention – and How to Think Deeply Again. His first book, Chasing the Scream: the First and Last Days of the War on Drugs was adapted into the Oscar nominated film The United States Vs Billie Holiday as well as a documentary series.    Johann is also the author of Lost Connections: Uncovering The Real Causes of Depression – and the Unexpected Solutions which was featured in a previous episode. His TED Talks have been viewed more than 80 million times.      In this episode we talk about:    Johann’s notion that there are twelve factors draining our focus His argument for the importance of both collective and individual action to reclaim our attention What he learned from a self-imposed three-month internet-free experiment How this impacts our children, and what we might do about it      Full Shownotes: https://www.tenpercent.com/podcast-episode/johann-hari-439

11 Apr 20221h 19min

New episodes come out every Monday, Wednesday, and Friday for free, with 1-week early access for Wondery+ subscribers. --- What if one of the keys to happiness is how intentional you are with your time? Ashley Whillans is an Assistant Professor at Harvard Business School and author of the book Time Smart. Her groundbreaking research has led her to radically reevaluate how she spends her own time. Her goal is to help you move from time poverty to time affluence. In this conversation, we talk about:  How to do a time audit Funding time, finding time, and reframing time The surprising extent to which prioritizing time over money predicts happiness–and what to do if you usually do the opposite How to handle “time confetti” The value of canceling meetings Full Shownotes: https://www.tenpercent.com/podcast-episode/ashley-whillans-repost-318

6 Apr 20221h 11min

New episodes come out every Monday, Wednesday, and Friday for free, with 1-week early access for Wondery+ subscribers. --- Often, we are our own worst critic. In this episode, Buddhist monk Ajahn Sucitto explores ways to unseat the inner tyrant and make peace with the nagging voice inside of you that seems to always demand perfection, but never offer praise.  Ajahn Sucitto was raised in the United Kingdom and became a monk in 1975 in the lineage of the Thai forest master, Venerable Ajahn Chah. In 1979, he helped establish Cittaviveka, also known as Chithurst Forest Monastery, in West Sussex, England where he still lives.  In this episode we talk about:  Strategies for addressing our inner critic Why we shouldn’t operate at 100%  The foolishness of turning our minds into courts of law The Buddhist precepts (or ethical guidelines) And the essential nature of sangha/community Full Shownotes: https://www.tenpercent.com/podcast-episode/ajahn-sucitto-437

4 Apr 202249min

New episodes come out every Monday, Wednesday, and Friday for free, with 1-week early access for Wondery+ subscribers. --- Brené Brown has found that most people are only able to identify three emotions: happy, sad and pissed off.  In this episode we explore how better understanding the full spectrum of your emotions, rather than drowning in them, can become an upward spiral.  Brené Brown is the author of six #1 New York Times bestsellers. Her latest book is Atlas of the Heart, which is also the name of her new HBO Max series. Brown is a research professor at the University of Houston and a visiting professor in management at the University of Texas at Austin McCombs School of Business.She has spent the past two decades studying courage, vulnerability, shame, and empathy. Her TED talk on the Power of Vulnerability is one of the top five most-viewed TED talks in the world, with over 50 million views.  We Talk About: Why she decided to map the 87 key emotions and experiences How she was deeply influenced by the Buddhist concept of the “near enemy” Why she no longer believes it's possible to read emotions in other people  Why meaningful connections require boundaries Content Warning: This episode contains explicit language, but a clean version of the episode is available at tenpercent.com and on the Ten Percent Happier app.  Full Shownotes: https://www.tenpercent.com/podcast-episode/brene-brown-436

1 Apr 202248min

New episodes come out every Monday, Wednesday, and Friday for free, with 1-week early access for Wondery+ subscribers. --- This episode dives into our archives to revisit the notion of communication as a learnable skill. Often some of the most painful situations you encounter are the result of poor communication. The good news is that communication is a skill that can be learned.  Author and meditation teacher Oren Jay Sofer, a leading figure in the field of interpersonal communication, breaks down how communication can be one of the most powerful levers for creating positive change in your life.  Oren Jay Sofer is the author of Say What You Mean: A Mindful Approach to Nonviolent Communication. He also teaches mindfulness, meditation and nonviolent communication in secular and Buddhist contexts. He graduated from Insight Meditation Center’s Spirit Rock Vipassana Teacher Training and is a long-time student of Joseph Goldstein, Michele McDonald, and Ajahn Sucitto. In this conversation, we also talk about: How to become aware of what motivates you to communicate the way you do  Strategies for how to have more meaningful conversations What it means to lead with presence How conflict has the possibility to deepen our relationships and make peace  Full Shownotes: https://www.tenpercent.com/podcast-episode/oren-jay-sofer-repost-165

30 Mars 202254min