2 Bears, 1 Happy Ending w/ Stavros Halkias & Chris Distefano | 2 Bears, 1 Cave

2 Bears, 1 Happy Ending w/ Stavros Halkias & Chris Distefano | 2 Bears, 1 Cave

SPONSORS: - Upgrade your wardrobe and save on @trueclassic at https://trueclassic.com/BEARS! #trueclassicpod - For simple, online access to personalized and affordable care for Hair Loss, ED, Weight Loss, and more, visit https://Hims.com/BEARS The Summer Bears are back and Chris Distefano and Stavros Halkias are fully locked into their takeover of 2 Bears 1 Cave. With Stav in a floral shirt and Chris squeezed into a Darryl Strawberry jersey, the two dive headfirst into tales of the wild ‘86 Mets, Kevin Spacey offering unsolicited shoulder rubs, and the horrifying science of ALS—because what’s funnier than degenerative nerve disease? Stavvy also gets a massage from Chrissy, we learn about Lenny Dykstra's podcast rates, and the guys debate polyamory, prostitutes, and just how many years Bert Kreischer has left. Speaking of Bert, he sends the guys a morbid video asking them to predict which comedian friends are not long for this world. Plus, Stav makes a strong case for becoming a Japanese-style husband, Chris recounts a near-affair that lasted 12 seconds on the LIRR, and together they fantasize about future threesomes with suspiciously supportive fans. Is it a good episode? No. Is it packed with fake current events, conspiracy theories, open marriages, and physical touch? You bet your bottom dollar it is. 2 Bears, 1 Cave Ep. 301 https://tomsegura.com/tour https://www.bertbertbert.com/tour https://store.ymhstudios.com Chapters 00:00:00 - Intro 00:01:42 - Baseball Greats, Kevin Spacey, & ALS 00:10:31 - Reading Fan Comments 00:27:20 - Swingers, Cucks, & Flirty Fans 00:36:33 - Montreal Screwjobs & Polyamory Shenanigans 00:44:58 - Trisha Paytas Baby Theory 00:51:34 - Comedian Death Pool 01:00:49 - Chrissy Massages Stavvy 01:07:23 - Wrap Up Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

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Ep. 18 | 2 Bears 1 Cave w/ Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer

Ep. 18 | 2 Bears 1 Cave w/ Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer

The 2 Bears, Tom Segura and Bert Kreischer are back in their 1 Cave! First we must discuss, what could be breaking news: Bert had a heart attack last night?! TMZ is trying to confirm! Then, Tom and Bert discuss the Ari Shaffir tweet about Kobe Bryant. Then we get on to the Super Bowl half time show! Jennifer Lopez and Shakira look absolutely incredible! Which one would you rather fill up?? LeeAnn got a text about Caronavirus from Christina that she forwarded to half her phone book and kids. Always check the link before forwarding to other people! Bert celebrates Chinese New Year and we get more impressions from Bert. Tom and Bert then debate the pros and cons of early morning drinking before flights. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

3 Feb 20201h 32min

Ep. 17 | 2 Bears 1 Cave w/ Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer

Ep. 17 | 2 Bears 1 Cave w/ Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer

In this episode of 2 Bears, 1 Cave, Tom Segura and Bert Kreischer discuss things they learned from their fathers, their feelings about over emotional people, and their new weight loss challenge. Tom also shares a cool story about about a guy who was not nice to his mom. What did YOU learn from your dad? Who do YOU think will win this weight loss challenge? Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

20 Jan 20201h 29min

Ep. 16 | 2 Bears 1 Cave w/ Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer

Ep. 16 | 2 Bears 1 Cave w/ Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer

What do the 2 Bears get up to in the cave this week? First, Tom and Bert show off hats that they're not sure if they can sell or not, but if guys like them, we'll figure something out! Then we get on the subject of Tom's new found love for speaking Spanish on podcasts! Is it all a rouse? What's the ACTUAL reason? Bert has some ideas! Bert then tells us about his spiritual healer. They also discuss their love of 50 Cent and how incredibly funny he is. Bert then starts to make some interesting observations: he thinks Christina P is the mastermind behind all the Bert-shaming that's been going on for years! is it true? Let us know in the comments! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

6 Jan 20201h 10min

Ep. 15 | 2 Bears 1 Cave w/ Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer

Ep. 15 | 2 Bears 1 Cave w/ Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer

Bert Kreischer is burning his mouth on an Uncrustable while Tom Segura laughs. That’s how this episode of 2 Bears 1 Cave begins. The only way to follow that is with a history lesson. Plus, we find out about Tom’s parenting misstep and about what a miracle Bert’s kids are alive and haven’t been taken away. There’s a quick call from Joey Diaz and the Bears reminisce about Bert’s old sex show. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

23 Dec 20191h 25min

Ep. 14 | 2 Bears 1 Cave w/ Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer

Ep. 14 | 2 Bears 1 Cave w/ Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer

Today, on 2 Bears 1 Cave, Tom Segura and Bert Kreischer talk about what they’re thankful for. After Tom’s “Toast” video with Sam Adams dropped, it got the Bears to thinking about what they should give thanks for this holiday season. We get a sample of Bert’s award winning impressions, interactions with alcoholics and some wild stories about “apologies.” Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

9 Dec 20191h 32min

Ep. 13 - 2 Bears 1 Cave 2 w/ Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer

Ep. 13 - 2 Bears 1 Cave 2 w/ Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer

On today's 2 Bears 1 Cave the music video that shook the internet to it's core is first seen by Bert Kreischer. This episode was recorded right as Tom Segura dropped his legendary music video and we get Bert's first reaction to seeing it for the first time. Plus, Tom has just shot his NETFLIX special as Bert is gearing up to shoot his. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

25 Nov 20191h 2min

Ep. 12 - 2 Bears 1 Cave 2 w/ Bert & LeeAnn Kreischer

Ep. 12 - 2 Bears 1 Cave 2 w/ Bert & LeeAnn Kreischer

This week on 2 Bears 1 Cave, Tom Segura is still on his Euro-tour and couldn't attend this recording. However, Bert Kreischer brought Mama-Bear LeeAnn. If you thought Bert was safe from being checked for an hour straight just because Tom wasn't there, GUESS AGAIN. We first get into Bert's recent weight loss. He actually legit looks good, but everyone (including himself) knows it won't last too long. We get into the inner working of Bert and LeeAnn's marriage. What would Widow-Bert and Widow-LeeAnn's lives look like? Does Bert have a "condition" he's not telling us about? We then get into what exactly IS and IS NOT cheating on your spouse, we give Tom a call, we get into Louis CK's tour email, and more! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

11 Nov 20191h 16min

Ep. 11 - 2 Bears 1 Cave 2 w/ Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer

Ep. 11 - 2 Bears 1 Cave 2 w/ Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer

Tom Segura is appearing from Europe via hologram and Bert Kreischer is very down in weight! It's 2 Bears 1 Cave! Do you have wild hiking thoughts? Is making out cheating? These questions and more are answered. Plus, an appearance by Whitney Cummings after a "viewing" sparks some questions. Bert and Tom talk about So Over October with Christina P and LeeAnn Kreischer, and we ask "Who cooks ONE egg?" Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

28 Okt 20191h 3min

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