Me, A Love Story: How Being OK With Yourself Makes You Better at Everything | Sharon Salzberg

Me, A Love Story: How Being OK With Yourself Makes You Better at Everything | Sharon Salzberg

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It might be hard to find a more annoying cliché than self-love; it can seem empty and inactionable. And even if you could make it work, I think many of us suspect it would lead to complacent resignation or unbridled narcissism. But there is an enormous amount of evidence that self-love, or as the scientists call it, self-compassion, can make you more effective in reaching your goals as well as lead to better relationships with everybody around you.


On today's show, the great meditation teacher Sharon Salzberg will walk us through the idea that love— both self-love and other love— is a skill that can be cultivated with massively positive impacts.


Salzberg is a meditation pioneer, world-renowned teacher, and New York Times bestselling author. She is one of the first to bring mindfulness and lovingkindness meditation to mainstream American culture over 45 years ago, inspiring generations of meditation teachers and wellness influencers. Sharon is co-founder of The Insight Meditation Society in Barre, MA, and the author of twelve books, including the New York Times bestseller, Real Happiness, now in its second edition, and her seminal work, Lovingkindness. Her forthcoming release, Real Life: The Journey from Isolation to Openness and Freedom, is set for release in April of 2023 from Flatiron Books. Her podcast, The Metta Hour, has amassed five million downloads and features interviews with thought leaders from the mindfulness movement and beyond.


This episode comes out in conjunction with Dan Harris' recent TED Talk on self-love. You can watch the full talk here.



In this episode we talk about:


  • The definition of self-hatred and its predominance in the West
  • The real practical benefits of self-compassion
  • Whether there is a difference between self-compassion and self-love
  • Why many people resist the idea of self-love
  • The distinction between empathy and compassion and how they work together in Buddhism
  • How to have lovingkindness for somebody who doesn't feel we have the right to exist
  • Reclaiming words like love and happiness
  • And how generosity makes us more whole



Full Shownotes: www.tenpercent.com/podcast-episode/sharon-salzberg-510

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Daniel Goleman, Diving into 'Emotional Intelligence' (Bonus Episode!)

Daniel Goleman, Diving into 'Emotional Intelligence' (Bonus Episode!)

"The human central nervous system and brain is designed the same around the world... and there probably is a lot of spontaneous rediscovery in different areas of different ways you can play with the mind," Dan Goleman, renowned psychologist and author of the best-selling book, "Emotional Intelligence," says in our interview. Goleman has helped spread the concept of "emotional intelligence," or "EQ," and its four parts -- self-awareness, self-management, social awareness (empathy) and relationship management (social skills) -- across the globe and explains why it matters a great deal in leadership.

14 Apr 201749min

Sam Harris, 'Waking Up' Podcast Host, Neuroscientist

Sam Harris, 'Waking Up' Podcast Host, Neuroscientist

Sam Harris, who has no relation to our beloved host, is a scientist, a controversial skeptic and the author of several New York Times bestsellers, including "The End of Faith," "The Moral Landscape" and "Waking Up" (also the title of his popular podcast). During our interview, Harris hosts a clinic on deconstructing "consciousness and its contents" with the help of meditation, and recognizing how getting lost in thought can be tied to suffering.

12 Apr 20171h 32min

Clair Brown, Economist, Author of 'Buddhist Economics'

Clair Brown, Economist, Author of 'Buddhist Economics'

Clair Brown, an economics professor at UC-Berkeley and a Tibetan Buddhist, was teaching an introductory course when she asked herself, "How would Buddha teach Econ One?" Brown went on to write the book, "Buddhist Economics: An Enlightened Approach to the Dismal Science," and advocates for a more mindful approach to how we contribute to society, for example, that as consumers, we should work to simplify our lives by focusing on what matters most to us, buying less and reducing our carbon footprint.

5 Apr 201741min

Jewel, Grammy-Nominated Singer-Songwriter, Actress (Bonus!)

Jewel, Grammy-Nominated Singer-Songwriter, Actress (Bonus!)

Jewel, whose poetic songs about relationships and heartache dominated the airwaves in the '90s, used writing as an outlet to deal with anxiety through a tough childhood and later, homelessness. She began looking for ways to "re-wire" her brain, change her life for the better, and came to Mindfulness. The Grammy-nominated recording artist wrote a memoir, "Never Broken: Songs Are Only Half the Story," and stars in the upcoming Hallmark movie, "Framed for Murder: A Fixer-Upper Mystery," airing Sunday, April 2.

31 Mars 201731min

Jerry Colonna, 'CEO Whisperer' and Reboot.io Founder

Jerry Colonna, 'CEO Whisperer' and Reboot.io Founder

Jerry Colonna was working as a venture capitalist in New York City during the 9/11 terrorist attacks, and as he walked by wreckage of the World Trade Center towers, he said he felt like his "world was falling apart." Colonna went on to become a practicing Buddhist and in 2014 he founded Reboot.io, a CEO-coaching company where he serves as a certified professional coach for the heads of some of the most dynamic start-ups in the United States.

29 Mars 201759min

Colin Beavan, the 'No Impact Man'

Colin Beavan, the 'No Impact Man'

In his famous book and documentary film project, "No Impact Man," Colin Beavan, a senior Dharma teacher in the Zen tradition, chronicled a year of his life as he tried to have minimal impact on the environment while living in the bustling metropolis of New York City. He followed it up with a book called, "How to Be Alive: A Guide to the Kind of Happiness that Helps the World," a sort of twist on the self-help genre that he calls "each other help."

22 Mars 201743min

Profs. Holly Richardson & Matt Jarman, Virginia Military Institute

Profs. Holly Richardson & Matt Jarman, Virginia Military Institute

Virginia Military Institute, a military college in Lexington, Virginia, was another stop on the cross-country meditation tour, where our host Dan Harris and meditation teacher Jeff Warren spoke to Profs. Holly Richardson and Matt Jarman, as well as a few cadets who have taken their classes. Jarman, a psychology professor who leads a "Modern Warriorship" course with meditation, and Richardson, a physical education professor who teaches a mindfulness class, both talk about how they teach cadets in a military environment that meditation can help them be more mentally efficient.

15 Mars 201743min

Sylvia Moir, Tempe, Arizona, Police Chief

Sylvia Moir, Tempe, Arizona, Police Chief

During their cross-county meditation bus tour in January, our host Dan Harris and meditation teacher Jeff Warren stopped in Tempe, Arizona, to talk with Sylvia Moir, who has been the head of the Tempe Police Department for the past year. Chief Moir says her mindfulness practice has not only helped her during high-stress police calls but also in how she engages with and leads her fellow officers.

8 Mars 201746min

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