A Conversation about Abuse, Agency, and Mindfulness | Tanya Selvaratnam

A Conversation about Abuse, Agency, and Mindfulness | Tanya Selvaratnam

Before we dive in, a warning: this conversation includes descriptions of abuse and violence. As you may know, March 8th, the day we're dropping this episode, is International Women's Day. We have a story today about intimate violence, which has long been a problem for women around the world, and has only intensified during the pandemic. My guest is Tanya Selvaratnam, a writer and artist who I've known socially for many, many years. I was truly shocked when Tanya's name surfaced in the media three years ago, in connection with the case of Eric Schneiderman. Eric was the celebrated Attorney General of New York State. He was also a regular on the local meditation scene. I knew Eric and Tanya were dating. What I did not know was that, behind the scenes, Eric was allegedly physically and emotionally abusing Tanya. She has now come out with a book, called Assume Nothing, which goes into searing detail about not only the alleged abuse, but also about how she flipped the script, regained her agency, helped bring her alleged abuser down, and how she has healed subsequently -- in no small part through meditation and therapy. Please note: If you or someone you know is suffering from abuse, you can find resources curated by Tanya at the "full shownotes" link below. We'd also like to provide more context about the allegations Tanya shares in this interview: When the allegations of abuse against New York Attorney General Eric Schneiderman by Tanya and three other women were first made public in The New Yorker in May 2018, Schneiderman quickly resigned. In a statement at the time, he said, "serious allegations, which I strongly contest, have been made against me." He also said, "While these allegations are unrelated to my professional conduct or the operations of the office, they will effectively prevent me from leading the office's work at this critical time. I therefore resign my office." After a six-month investigation, prosecutors declined to bring criminal charges against Schneiderman, citing legal impediments, including statutes of limitations. But the district attorney assigned to the case by Governor Andrew Cuomo also said that she "believed the women who shared their experiences" with investigators. In response, Schneiderman said, "I recognize that District Attorney Singas' decision not to prosecute does not mean I have done nothing wrong. I accept full responsibility for my conduct in my relationships with my accusers, and for the impact it had on them." I should also note that our team reached out to Eric Schneiderman and that he declined to comment for this episode. Two more items: First, remember to check out "In Plain Sight: Lady Bird Johnson," a new podcast from ABC News, on Apple Podcasts (https://apple.co/ladybird), Spotify (https://spoti.fi/3ukYgoq), or wherever you're listening now. Finally, we are looking for a podcast marketer at Ten Percent Happier. If you love this show, marketing, and building relationships, we would love to have you on the team to help us grow Ten Percent Happier and our future shows. Please apply at https://www.tenpercent.com/careers. Full Shownotes: https://www.tenpercent.com/podcast-episode/tanya-selvaratnam-328

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Matt Gutman, The Boys in the Cave

Matt Gutman, The Boys in the Cave

ABC News Senior National Correspondent Matt Gutman is, unfortunately, no stranger to tragedy, both in his career as a journalist and his personal life. He learned the practice of meditation at just 12 years old, mere months before his father would be killed in a plane crash. And now, nearly 30 years later he's reporting on how meditation played a role in the miraculous rescue of 12 boys trapped in a cave in his new book, "The Boys in the Cave: Deep Inside the Impossible Rescue in Thailand." He opens up about his own personal tragedy and gives a riveting account of that rescue in this week's conversation. Have a question for Dan? Leave us a voicemail at 646-883-8326.

14 Nov 20181h 1min

Jordan Harbinger, Networking and Relationship Development

Jordan Harbinger, Networking and Relationship Development

7 Nov 20181h 3min

Judson Brewer, Unwinding Anxiety

Judson Brewer, Unwinding Anxiety

31 Okt 201852min

Tal Rabinowitz, Forgoing Hollywood and Finding Meditation

Tal Rabinowitz, Forgoing Hollywood and Finding Meditation

Tal Rabinowitz was a top executive at NBC, developing some of the network's high profile comedy programs, but after nearly 20 years in the business she was let go. And then, SHE let go. Rabinowitz found herself burned out and ready to take her career in a new direction. She tells Dan how and why she decided to open up her own meditation studio, what her meditation practice looks like and how she's introducing meditation to her two-year-old daughter.

24 Okt 201856min

Adam Grant, The Benefits of Generosity

Adam Grant, The Benefits of Generosity

Kindness has a bad rap, often being viewed as a sign of weakness. But Adam Grant, an award-winning researcher and Wharton's highest-rated professor, tells Dan Harris good guys don't have to finish last. In fact, Givers, those willing to help others, are often the top performers in their field of choice. Later in the interview, Dan and Adam engage in a thoughtful debate about the benefits of meditation.

17 Okt 20181h 14min

Shawn Achor, The Science Behind Gratitude

Shawn Achor, The Science Behind Gratitude

While so much of science is dedicated to finding the causes and cures for depression, anxiety and stress, Shawn Achor studies the opposite. He is a happiness researcher. Achor looks at the science of happiness and uses research-based techniques to make us more optimistic and help us lead happier lives.

10 Okt 20181h 15min

Strauss Zelnick, Becoming Ageless

Strauss Zelnick, Becoming Ageless

At just 32 years old Strauss Zelnick became the president and chief operating officer of 20th Century Fox. He was young, successful and appeared to have it all, but internally he was struggling. Zelnick says he was unhappy, anxious all the time and drinking every night. Now, nearly 30 years later, Zelnick remains super successful and thanks to his daily physical and spiritual practice he's become the picture of health. Zelnick reveals his secrets in his new book Becoming Ageless: The Four Secrets to Looking and Feeling Younger Than Ever and discusses them with Dan in this interview.

3 Okt 20181h 8min

Susan Piver, Buddhist Wisdom for Modern Relationships

Susan Piver, Buddhist Wisdom for Modern Relationships

Susan Piver was a tough girl. Like, crime-fighting, head of the Boston chapter of the Guardian Angels tough. After nearly being killed by a drunk driver, her path led her to yoga, meditation and Buddhism -- which, by her own admission, made her "soft." But, only by softening toward herself, was she able to soften toward others. Having learned she could apply her teachings to relationships, in the midst of marital troubles and fearing divorce, she was inspired to apply the four noble truths of Buddhism to save her marriage.

26 Sep 20181h 15min

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