A Conversation about Abuse, Agency, and Mindfulness | Tanya Selvaratnam

A Conversation about Abuse, Agency, and Mindfulness | Tanya Selvaratnam

Before we dive in, a warning: this conversation includes descriptions of abuse and violence. As you may know, March 8th, the day we’re dropping this episode, is International Women’s Day. We have a story today about intimate violence, which has long been a problem for women around the world, and has only intensified during the pandemic. My guest is Tanya Selvaratnam, a writer and artist who I’ve known socially for many, many years. I was truly shocked when Tanya’s name surfaced in the media three years ago, in connection with the case of Eric Schneiderman. Eric was the celebrated Attorney General of New York State. He was also a regular on the local meditation scene. I knew Eric and Tanya were dating. What I did not know was that, behind the scenes, Eric was allegedly physically and emotionally abusing Tanya. She has now come out with a book, called Assume Nothing, which goes into searing detail about not only the alleged abuse, but also about how she flipped the script, regained her agency, helped bring her alleged abuser down, and how she has healed subsequently -- in no small part through meditation and therapy. Please note: If you or someone you know is suffering from abuse, you can find resources curated by Tanya at the “full shownotes” link below. We’d also like to provide more context about the allegations Tanya shares in this interview: When the allegations of abuse against New York Attorney General Eric Schneiderman by Tanya and three other women were first made public in The New Yorker in May 2018, Schneiderman quickly resigned. In a statement at the time, he said, “serious allegations, which I strongly contest, have been made against me.” He also said, “While these allegations are unrelated to my professional conduct or the operations of the office, they will effectively prevent me from leading the office’s work at this critical time. I therefore resign my office.” After a six-month investigation, prosecutors declined to bring criminal charges against Schneiderman, citing legal impediments, including statutes of limitations. But the district attorney assigned to the case by Governor Andrew Cuomo also said that she “believed the women who shared their experiences” with investigators. In response, Schneiderman said, "I recognize that District Attorney Singas' decision not to prosecute does not mean I have done nothing wrong. I accept full responsibility for my conduct in my relationships with my accusers, and for the impact it had on them." I should also note that our team reached out to Eric Schneiderman and that he declined to comment for this episode. Two more items: First, remember to check out “In Plain Sight: Lady Bird Johnson,” a new podcast from ABC News, on Apple Podcasts (https://apple.co/ladybird), Spotify (https://spoti.fi/3ukYgoq), or wherever you’re listening now. Finally, we are looking for a podcast marketer at Ten Percent Happier. If you love this show, marketing, and building relationships, we would love to have you on the team to help us grow Ten Percent Happier and our future shows. Please apply at https://www.tenpercent.com/careers. Full Shownotes: https://www.tenpercent.com/podcast-episode/tanya-selvaratnam-328

Jaksot(903)

Willoughby Britton, Jared Lindahl -- Does Meditation Have a Dark Side?

Willoughby Britton, Jared Lindahl -- Does Meditation Have a Dark Side?

Many of us get into meditation because we want to be calmer, less stressed and less yanked around by our emotions, but sometimes there are unwanted effects. Brown University researchers Willoughby Britton, an assistant professor of psychiatry and human behavior, and Jared Lindahl, a visiting assistant professor of religious studies, published a new study today on the wide range of difficult experiences and challenges meditators they interviewed said they faced in their practice.

24 Touko 20171h 16min

Lodro Rinzler, Meditation for the Heartbroken

Lodro Rinzler, Meditation for the Heartbroken

Buddhist meditation teacher Lodro Rinzler, who had been meditating for most of his life, found himself dealing with multiple, heartbreaking tribulations in his 20s and he fell into despair for a while. After working through his experience, Rinzler, who has written six books and co-founded MNDFL in New York City, focused on having conversations about how Buddhist teachings can help others cope with devastating life events.

17 Touko 201754min

Jen Kirkman, Comedian, Author

Jen Kirkman, Comedian, Author

Stand-up comedian Jen Kirkman was introduced to meditation at a young age and over the years has tried a bunch of different outlets, from 'body scan' practice to mantra to meditation classes, to help her deal with panic disorder, depression, anxiety and the chaos of a hectic schedule in the entertainment industry. Kirkman, who even includes a whole bit about her practice as part of her stand-up routine, offers a very interesting take on meditation, not only as it pertains to everyday life but also as it pertains to someone trying to be creative and funny.

10 Touko 201757min

Jeffrey Walker, Former JPMorgan Exec, Philanthropist (Bonus!)

Jeffrey Walker, Former JPMorgan Exec, Philanthropist (Bonus!)

Jeffrey Walker served 25 years as the CEO and cofounder of CCMP Capital, the $12 billion successor to JPMorgan Partners, JPMorgan Chase & Co's global private equity group, the vice chairman of JPMorgan Chase & Co. and chairman of the JPMorgan Chase Foundation, and said he was "always pretty open" with his coworkers about practicing mindfulness -- even taught meditation to his fellow executives. Walker, who now holds leadership roles in a number of non-profits and has an investor group called Bridge Builders Collaborative, puts a huge emphasis on teamwork and building better relationships to do good in the world.

5 Touko 201749min

Jon Kabat-Zinn, Creator of Mindfulness-Based Stress Reduction

Jon Kabat-Zinn, Creator of Mindfulness-Based Stress Reduction

Jon Kabat-Zinn was on a meditation retreat in the late '70s when he had an idea to marry science with mindfulness and bring the practice into hospitals, which then led to his redefining an important element of patient care. Kabat-Zinn is the founding executive director of the Center for Mindfulness in Medicine, Health Care, and Society at the University of Massachusetts Medical School and the founding director of its renowned Stress Reduction Clinic, who created Mindfulness-Based Stress Reduction (MBSR) programs that are used in hundreds of hospitals, clinics and labs all over the world.

3 Touko 201759min

Russell Simmons, Philanthropist, Entrepreneur, Author and Activist

Russell Simmons, Philanthropist, Entrepreneur, Author and Activist

Def Jam music label founder Russell Simmons had his first experience with stillness at a yoga class -- which he admits he took because girls were there. “I went to class because of a lot of hot chicks. It's true,” Simmons says in our interview. Simmons, who practices and teaches Transcendental Meditation, has worked to bring meditation to schools to help lower their violence levels and increase students’ learning abilities. He explains why being a vegan has dramatically changed his health for the better and what his relationship with President Donald Trump is like today.

26 Huhti 201726min

David Leite, Food Writer, Memoirist (LIVE!)

David Leite, Food Writer, Memoirist (LIVE!)

In a special edition of the "10% Happier" podcast, Dan Harris leads a discussion with David Leite, author of "Notes on a Banana: A Memoir of Food, Love and Manic Depression," in front of a live audience in New York City. Leite talks at length about struggling with bipolar disorder for decades -- and going undiagnosed for much of that time -- but also shares funny stories about navigating relationships and his passion for food.

19 Huhti 201752min

Daniel Goleman, Diving into 'Emotional Intelligence' (Bonus Episode!)

Daniel Goleman, Diving into 'Emotional Intelligence' (Bonus Episode!)

"The human central nervous system and brain is designed the same around the world... and there probably is a lot of spontaneous rediscovery in different areas of different ways you can play with the mind," Dan Goleman, renowned psychologist and author of the best-selling book, "Emotional Intelligence," says in our interview. Goleman has helped spread the concept of "emotional intelligence," or "EQ," and its four parts -- self-awareness, self-management, social awareness (empathy) and relationship management (social skills) -- across the globe and explains why it matters a great deal in leadership.

14 Huhti 201749min

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