How I’ve Made Women Feel Unsafe

How I’ve Made Women Feel Unsafe

In this episode, I walk through my past relationships and take ownership of the ways I’ve been unsafe. I share specific moments - steamrolling my ex-wife with logic instead of empathy, making subtle body comments that landed harder than I understood, ending relationships abruptly, and moving on too quickly after a breakup. At the time, I justified a lot of it. Looking back, I see the impact. I also talk about asking my current partner to tell me how I’ve made her feel unsafe over the past eight years. I held her, promised not to defend myself, and listened. And I cried. This isn’t about shame. It’s about ownership. If you’re a man listening, the question isn’t “Am I a good guy?”It’s: Where have I been unsafe — and what would it mean to do better? 🎙️ Host Links: 📘 Read John’s new book in progress Sh*t Your Therapist Would Never Tell You on John’s SubStack ⁠HERE⁠ If you’re ready for deeper work, the Secure Self course is available HERE Order John's new book, Break Up. On Purpose,⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Follow John on Instagram⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Find out more about John⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

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Episoder(1105)

The resentment you don’t talk about will change your relationship

The resentment you don’t talk about will change your relationship

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2 Sep 24min

What the darkness taught me about God

What the darkness taught me about God

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31 Aug 25min

Therapy Thursdays | Why You’re Stuck, What Real Intimacy Feels Like & Letting Go Without Closure

Therapy Thursdays | Why You’re Stuck, What Real Intimacy Feels Like & Letting Go Without Closure

Why do we remain stuck in the same patterns, compare ourselves to our partner’s past, or wait for an ex to give us closure? In Episode 26 of Therapy Thursdays, John answers your most personal quest...

27 Aug 17min

How We Sabotage Ourselves

How We Sabotage Ourselves

I’m breaking down the biggest ways I think we sabotage our own healing, relationships, and lives. This conversation came from a post that resonated with millions of people and grew into a series becau...

26 Aug 20min

10 Questions About Love

10 Questions About Love

What happens when I know better but still find myself repeating the same relationship patterns? I answer 10 questions about love, attachment, obsession, loneliness, breakups, abuse, reconciliation, an...

24 Aug 23min

Are you in love or attached to the fantasy?

Are you in love or attached to the fantasy?

What is the difference between loving someone and becoming obsessed with them? In this episode, I explore how love can slowly turn into fixation, fantasy, and emotional dependency, and why so many of ...

19 Aug 38min

The house you grew up in still lives inside you

The house you grew up in still lives inside you

The house I grew up in is probably still living inside me. And the house you grew up in may still be living inside you, too. I’m recording from a diner in Mexico City and exploring one of the most ...

17 Aug 23min

Therapy Thursdays | How to know what’s actually healthy for you

Therapy Thursdays | How to know what’s actually healthy for you

In this Therapy Thursdays episode, I’m answering the relationship and personal-growth questions we often think about but don’t always know how to ask. What does an emotionally safe relationship act...

13 Aug 15min

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