Your Ambitions Might Not Be Yours | Tom Rath

Most of us reach our 40s and discover something unsettling: the ambitions we've been chasing weren't entirely ours. They came from parents, from culture, from the two or three careers we happened to see up close. Tom Rath calls this looking through a pinhole, and he thinks it explains more midlife restlessness than most of us are willing to admit.

Tom is one of the most widely-read researchers on how careers shape health and wellbeing. His books, including the instant number one New York Times bestseller How Full Is Your Bucket? and StrengthsFinder 2.0, have sold more than 10 million copies. His latest book is What's the Point?: Turning Purpose into Your Daily Superpower.

In this conversation, you'll explore:

Why only 50 jobs represent half the entire labor market, and what that means for the choices you made at 18
The difference between a ladder and a garden as frameworks for a life and why one of them is making you miserable
What headstones actually say (and never say) about what we thought mattered
The legacy question that most people answer wrong and what Tom's grandfather's final hours taught him about the purest form of giving
Why purpose is less about finding your calling and more about something entirely different

There's a particular kind of grief that comes from realizing your striving belonged to someone else. This conversation is for anyone in midlife who's starting to ask whether the ladder they've been climbing was theirs to begin with.

You can find Tom at: Website | Instagram | Episode Transcript

Next week, we're sharing our conversation with Bela Gandhi to talk about why midlife is actually the moment most people become more ready for a real relationship — and what's quietly getting in the way. Be sure to follow Good Life Project wherever you get your podcasts so you don’t miss any upcoming episodes!

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