Why You Can’t Do It Alone

Why You Can’t Do It Alone

Can anyone truly succeed alone? We explore how role models, mentors, and strong social support make upward mobility far more possible than grit alone.

Summary: What role do the people around us play in shaping our success? Brothers Danny and Gilbert Murillo share how education, mentorship, and their evolving relationship helped them overcome incarceration and systemic barriers to build lives of purpose. Then, Social Mobility Lab founder Bob McKinnon explains why success is never a solo journey and how recognizing our own "dream team" can expand what's possible for ourselves and others.

How To Do This Practice:

  1. Reflect on your journey: Think about where you are today and the moments that shaped your path. Consider both the opportunities you had and the challenges you overcame.
  2. Identify your dream team: Write down the people who have encouraged, protected, guided, or inspired you throughout your life. They might be family members, teachers, friends, mentors, coaches, or colleagues.
  3. Recognize their impact: For each person, note one way they helped you grow or see new possibilities. Notice how your achievements are connected not only to your own efforts, but also to the support you received.
  4. Look ahead with intention: Ask yourself what kind of support you need right now. Is there someone you could learn from, ask for advice, or build a stronger relationship with as you work toward your next goal?
  5. Move forward with self-compassion: As you pursue your goals, remember that success and setbacks are never yours alone. Focus on what you can control, ask for help when you need it, and offer yourself the same grace you'd extend to someone you care about.

Scroll down for a transcription of this episode.

DANNY MURILLO is the co-founder of Underground Scholars, a program that creates pathways to higher education for incarcerated, formerly incarcerated, and system-impacted people.

Learn more about Danny here: https://undergroundscholars.berkeley.edu/members

GILBERT MURILLO is a policy advocate and researcher who draws on his own experience with incarceration to reform California's criminal justice system.

Learn more about Gilbert here: https://capolicylab.org/staff/gilbert-murillo/

BOB MCKINNON is an author, teacher, and Director of the Social Mobility Lab at the Colin Powell School for Civic and Global Leadership at The City College of New York

Learn more about Bob here: https://greatergood.berkeley.edu/profile/bob_mckinnon

Related Science of Happiness episodes:

Why Compassion Requires Vulnerability: https://tinyurl.com/mrxsad33

Related Happiness Break episodes:

A Science-Backed Path to Self-Forgiveness: https://tinyurl.com/2js59anm

Message us or leave a comment on Instagram @scienceofhappinesspod. E-mail us at happinesspod@berkeley.edu or use the hashtag #happinesspod.

Help us share The Science of Happiness! Leave us a 5-star review on Apple Podcasts or share this link with someone who might like the show: https://tinyurl.com/2p9h5aap

Transcription: https://tinyurl.com/3j352txy

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