1818 || apologies vs. repair

1818 || apologies vs. repair

Sometimes the kindest and wisest thing you can do in a relationship is clearly and concisely distance yourself from it until you figure out how to navigate it more appropriately.


To develop a robust grief process we must 1. Mourn what is lost. 2. Name what is good. 3. Release what was not.


Stepping back, creating distance, and taking space are crucial aspects to the healing process.


There is huge difference between a well intentioned apology and real long term repair. If you have a conflict or suffer from a betrayal your brain and body can’t just lean into a well worded and well intentioned apology as a bandaid for all of the harm that was caused. I wish words were enough but that’s like saying a broken arm can be healed with a diagnosis. Just because the X-Ray says you have a broken arm it doesn't solve the problem. The diagnosis is a great start to healing properly, but it doesn’t mean the work stops there. You’ve got to prove to your brain and body that you’re not going to let this get worse, happen again, and you’re going to behave differently now so you can create a safe space to relax and heal properly, which takes time.


SOURCES:

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IG AMYTHELIFECOACH


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The opinions expressed by Julie Merica and Make Your Damn Bed Podcast are intended for entertainment purposes only. Make Your Damn Bed podcast is not intended or implied to be a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis or treatment.

Read Julie's Medium Blog.

Support JULIE (and the show!)

Support + get some bonus stuff over on PATREON.

Get an occasional personal email from me: www.makeyourdamnbedpodcast.com

Tune in on INSTAGRAM AND YOUTUBE or TIKTOK

Support this show http://supporter.acast.com/make-your-damn-bed.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

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Episoder(1877)

1849 || you are what you avoid

1849 || you are what you avoid

You are not only what you consciously intend. You are also what you habitually avoid, deny, and disown. The shadow is not your enemy, and it is not your identity. It is the place where refused life ac...

10 Sep 10min

1848 || when intentions aren't enough

1848 || when intentions aren't enough

You're not broken, you're human. And being human is often difficult and contradictory work. Shadow work is grounded in deep internal reflection, not self-optimization. "Jung describes the shadow as co...

9 Sep 10min

1847 || being the "good guy" vs. becoming the villain

1847 || being the "good guy" vs. becoming the villain

Confidence, drive, boundary setting, focus, and self-led intention are considered "bad traits" in a patriarchal society, but they aren't.https://moral-ranking.fandom.com/wiki/Villainshttps://meridianu...

8 Sep 10min

1847 || become the villain

1847 || become the villain

One thing I appreciate about the villain archetype is the confidence it implies. Darth Vader isn’t gonna procrastinate because he is too tired or lacks the confidence to start. Bad guys don’t tend to ...

7 Sep 11min

1846 || integrate the shadows

1846 || integrate the shadows

We all love the idea of a redemption arc. We love the idea of hitting rock bottom and bouncing up and transforming into a confident, powerful badass permanently. As humans, we tend to see things in bl...

6 Sep 10min

1845 || rock bottom is part of the healing journey

1845 || rock bottom is part of the healing journey

Part of me wants to beat a bitch's ass and part of me wants to shut down completely. This conflict makes us feel bad for feeling bad. We have to learn how to integrate these conflicting feelings. Ment...

5 Sep 9min

1844 || the healing journey

1844 || the healing journey

The healing journey is not linear and it exists in many forms. The healing journey outlined by the Buddhist Library is:HURT. FEAR OR ANGER. FEAR AND ANGER GIVE RISE TO CONFLICTS. LOSS OF LOVE FOR S...

4 Sep 11min

1843 || the hero  vs heroine's journey

1843 || the hero vs heroine's journey

Note: When I speak of women vs. men in this context I don’t do it to reinforce the binary. I don’t believe in the binary, but because we grew up and now exist in a society that reinforces the binary a...

3 Sep 10min

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