Adult Child Estrangement: What to Do—and How to Hold On to Hope :: Dr. Jim Burns [Ep 587]

What happens when our kids grow up and our role as their mom begins to change?

This is something I think so many moms struggle with, but we don't always talk about it. When our kids are young, there is so much support and conversation around parenting. But once they become adults, the challenges can feel much more complicated and lonely.

We can find ourselves comparing our kids' lives. Where did they go to college? Are they married? Do they have kids? What are they doing with their lives? And then there are the harder questions. What happens when our adult child makes choices we don't understand? What happens when they pull away from us? And what happens when there is little or no contact at all?

In this episode, I talk with Dr. Jim Burns about one of the hardest topics many parents face: estrangement from an adult child. We talk about what estrangement can look like, why parents often ask themselves, "What did I do wrong?" and how we can move from heartache to hope.

One of the biggest reminders in this conversation is that we cannot fix our adult children. But we can learn how to love them well, communicate differently, and keep the door open for reconciliation.

In This Episode, We Talk About:

• Why moms often struggle silently when parenting adult children
• The comparison game that can happen when our kids become adults
• What adult child estrangement can look like
• Why parents often blame themselves when a child pulls away
• Why unsolicited advice can feel like criticism
• How to become the calmest person in the room
• Being a safe person without becoming a doormat
• Moving from being an advice giver to becoming a mentor

• How to respond when we feel defensive or hurt

Connect with Dr. Jim Burns:

• Website: HomeWord
• Instagram: Dr. Jim Burns and Doug Fields (@homewordfamily)
• Facebook: HomeWord Family

Links Mentioned:

• When Your Adult Child Strays: By Jim Burns Ph.D
• Doing Life with Your Adult Children: By Jim Burns Ph.D
• Boundaries: By Henry Cloud and John Townsend
• Reconnecting with Your Estranged Adult Child: By Tina Gilbertson
• Jim Burns Podcast - HomeWord

Related Episodes:

• Strengthening the Relationship with Your Adult Child :: Kathy Cunningham [Ep 543]
• How to {really} Parent with Grace :: Jeannie Cunnion {Ep 55}
• “How do I connect better with my kids?” [Ep 475]

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