The Opposite of Schadenfreude | Election Sanity Series | Tuere Sala

The Opposite of Schadenfreude | Election Sanity Series | Tuere Sala

There’s an old expression: “Every time a friend succeeds, I die a little bit.” I love that saying, because it speaks to how hard it can be to take pleasure in other people’s happiness. That said, while it may be difficult, it is not impossible -- and moreover, as our guest today will argue, it’s a massively useful skill, especially as we endure this bonkers election. Welcome to week three of our special Election Sanity podcast series. Every Monday in October, we’re tackling a mental skill drawn from an ancient Buddhist list known as the Four Brahma Viharas, or the Four Heavenly Abodes. Don’t be fooled by the high falutin’ name; these skills are eminently achievable, and massively helpful. I can say this based on both personal experience, and also a significant amount of scientific research. In the previous two episodes, we explored loving-kindness (also known by the less gooey moniker of “friendliness”), and also compassion. This week it’s “sympathetic joy,” or “mudita.” You can think of this skill as the opposite of Schadenfreude; instead of reveling in the suffering of other people, you’re celebrating their happiness. Our guest today calls it “borrowing joy.” Her name is Tuere Sala. She’s a guiding teacher at Insight Seattle. She’s no pollyanna; she doesn’t sugarcoat how challenging mudita can be, but she does have a strategy that I think you will find appealingly doable. Where to find Tuere Sala online: Seattle Insight Meditation Society: https://seattleinsight.org/Teachers/Teacher/TeacherID/102 Just a reminder, our Free Election Sanity meditation challenge starts next week. We're super excited about this one—we've worked with our very wise meditation teachers from this Election Sanity podcast series to create a really unique set of daily lessons and meditations, all geared toward helping you keep your cool during the 2020 Election. If you'd like to join the Challenge, Download the Ten Percent Happier app today to start meditating your way through this Election season, and see you in the Challenge with thousands of other meditators. It starts on Tuesday, October 27th! Full Shownotes: https://www.tenpercent.com/podcast-episode/tuere-sala-292

Episoder(902)

Let’s Normalize Failure (The Right Kind) | Manu Kapur

Let’s Normalize Failure (The Right Kind) | Manu Kapur

An expert in failure shows us how to find success in the most counterintuitive way.   Manu Kapur is currently the Director of the Singapore-ETH Center, and Professor for Learning Sciences and Higher Education at ETH Zurich, Switzerland, where he also directs The Future Learning Initiative (FLI). Manu is also the Founding Chair of the ETH Zurich – EPFL Joint Doctoral Program in the Learning Sciences. In this episode we talk about: The definition of Productive Failure (a concept Manu developed that allows you to design for and harness failure for deeper learning) Why we learn more from failing than from succeeding The difference between desirable and undesirable failure  The neuroscience of curiosity Practical ways to incorporate productive failure into your daily life How to get into your “failure zone”  Cool concepts like the looking back and moving the Gold posts How to normalize failure and create environments in which other people feel safe to fail  The role of psychological safety and a growth mindset And much more Join Dan’s online community here Follow Dan on social: Instagram, TikTok Subscribe to our YouTube Channel Additional Resources:  Productive Failure Manu’s Ted Talk Get ready for another Meditation Party at Omega Institute! This in-person workshop brings together Dan with his friends and meditation teachers, Sebene Selassie, Jeff Warren, and for the first time, Ofosu Jones-Quartey. The event runs October 24th-26th. Sign up and learn more at eomega.org/workshops/meditation-party-2025.   To advertise on the show, contact sales@advertisecast.com or visit https://advertising.libsyn.com/10HappierwithDanHarris   Sponsors: Coop Sleep Goods Upgrade your summer sleep. Visit coopsleepgoods.com/HAPPIER10 to get 20% off your first order.  Open Phone OpenPhone is offering our listeners 20% off of your first 6 months at OpenPhone.com/happier. NOCD Head over to nocd.com and book a free 15‑minute call with their team, to learn more and start getting help with OCD.

11 Aug 1h 1min

Pods We Love: Happier with Gretchen Rubin

Pods We Love: Happier with Gretchen Rubin

Sharing an episode today from our friend Gretchen Rubin’s podcast, Happier. Gretchen and her sister Elizabeth Craft discuss the idea of the “familect” and why it might be fun to create a  dictionary for our own familect. They also talk about a hack that makes it easier to use a smartphone, and they share dozens of listeners’ thought-provoking  “Secrets of Adulthood.” Get ready for another Meditation Party at Omega Institute! This in-person workshop brings together Dan with his friends and meditation teachers, Sebene Selassie, Jeff Warren, and for the first time, Ofosu Jones-Quartey. The event runs October 24th-26th. Sign up and learn more here!   Join Dan’s online community here Follow Dan on social: Instagram, TikTok Subscribe to our YouTube Channel   To advertise on the show, contact sales@advertisecast.com or visit https://advertising.libsyn.com/10HappierwithDanHarris

10 Aug 32min

A Surprisingly Effective Way to Deal With Your Inner Critic

A Surprisingly Effective Way to Deal With Your Inner Critic

We’re bringing you some of our favorite gems from the archives, as chosen by our staff. This week, we’re hearing from therapist Dick Schwartz, as chosen by Mani Chandy from our Substack team. Schwartz is the founder of Internal Family Systems, a way of looking at all of the various “parts” that we have inside ourselves, and how they can work together or make things harder for us.  Full Episodes: How to Handle Your Demons | Richard SchwartzHow (and Why) To Hug Your Inner Dragons | Richard Schwartz Get ready for another Meditation Party at Omega Institute! This in-person workshop brings together Dan with his friends and meditation teachers, Sebene Selassie, Jeff Warren, and for the first time, Ofosu Jones-Quartey. The event runs October 24th-26th. Sign up and learn more here! Join Dan’s online community here Follow Dan on social: Instagram, TikTok Subscribe to our YouTube Channel To advertise on the show, contact sales@advertisecast.com or visit https://advertising.libsyn.com/10HappierwithDanHarris

8 Aug 28min

How To Handle Dilemmas, Drift, Indecision, and Difficult People | Gretchen Rubin

How To Handle Dilemmas, Drift, Indecision, and Difficult People | Gretchen Rubin

An avalanche of practical advice and brief (but powerful) life lessons.   Gretchen Rubin is a New York Times bestselling author and happiness expert who explores human nature and habits. She’s a highly acclaimed writer, host of the podcast  Happier with Gretchen Rubin and the founder of the award-winning Happier app.    In this episode we talk about: What aphorisms are, and why they’re useful  How to make decisions that lead to a “bigger life" Why you should pay special attention to anything you lie about or hide  The argument against task-sharing  The dangers of being indecisive  Why offering emotional validation can often be more powerful than offering solutions Why you should pay close attention when people repeat themselves over and over And much more Related Episodes: The Happiness Project: Revisited  How To Use Your Five Senses To Reduce Anxiety, Increase Creativity, and Improve Your Relationships  Small Ways to Improve Your Everyday Life Right Now  Outer Order, Inner Calm  'The Four Tendencies'  Gretchen Rubin (Our Long-Lost Pilot Episode)   Join Dan’s online community here Follow Dan on social: Instagram, TikTok Subscribe to our YouTube Channel Additional Resources:  Gretchen’s books The “Five Things Making Me Happy” Newsletter Gretchen on Substack: Secrets of Adulthood   Get ready for another Meditation Party at Omega Institute! This in-person workshop brings together Dan with his friends and meditation teachers, Sebene Selassie, Jeff Warren, and for the first time, Ofosu Jones-Quartey. The event runs October 24th-26th. Sign up and learn more here.   To advertise on the show, contact sales@advertisecast.com or visit https://advertising.libsyn.com/10HappierwithDanHarris

6 Aug 1h 4min

Why You Say Yes When You Shouldn’t — And How To Say No When It Matters Most | Dr. Sunita Sah

Why You Say Yes When You Shouldn’t — And How To Say No When It Matters Most | Dr. Sunita Sah

A conversation with a Cornell professor who is attempting to rebrand the concept of defiance. Dr. Sunita Sah started her career as a physician but then switched over to organizational psychology. At Cornell, she conducts research on influence, authority, compliance, and defiance. She is the author of Defy: The Power of No in a World That Demands Yes. In this episode we talk about: How Dr. Sah defines defiance  The costs of compliance  The five stages of defiance How to make defiance a practice The upside of tension  The importance of knowing your values — how to articulate them, and how this relates to our biology, specifically our hormones  The gender components of defiance  Join Dan’s online community here Follow Dan on social: Instagram, TikTok Subscribe to our YouTube Channel  To advertise on the show, contact sales@advertisecast.com or visit https://advertising.libsyn.com/10HappierwithDanHarris Sponsors: Smalls: For a limited time only, get 60% off your first order PLUS free shipping when you head to Smalls.com/HAPPIER.  Function Health: Learn more and join using our link. The first 1,000 get a $100 credit toward their membership. Visit www.functionhealth.com/HAPPIER or use gift code HAPPIER 100 at sign-up to own your health.

4 Aug 1h 10min

Are You Overcomplicating Your Life? | Kaira Jewel Lingo

Are You Overcomplicating Your Life? | Kaira Jewel Lingo

We’re in the midst of an exciting evolution of the overall 10% Happier project. In our quest to make this podcast more actionable – to help you operationalize all the game-changing ideas you encounter on this pod – we’re now offering guided meditations to accompany each full episode of the show, available to paid subscribers at DanHarris.com. For the month of August, those meditations will come from Kaira Jewel Lingo, a Buddhist teacher who spent 15 years as a monastic in the Plum Village tradition. In this bonus episode, you’ll hear our head of content, DJ Cashmere, in conversation with Kaira Jewel, sharing some of her fascinating backstory. From a communal Christian community in Chicago, to a Zen monastery in the south of France, to making her life as an independent teacher in New York, you’ll hear how the thread of “voluntary simplicity” runs through all of it.  Related Episodes: How To Keep Your Relationships On the Rails | Kaira Jewel Lingo A Buddhist Recipe for Handling Turmoil | Kaira Jewel Lingo Get ready for another Meditation Party at Omega Institute! This in-person workshop brings together Dan with his friends and meditation teachers, Sebene Selassie, Jeff Warren, and for the first time, Ofosu Jones-Quartey. The event runs October 24th-26th. Sign up and learn more here! Join Dan’s online community here Follow Dan on social: Instagram, TikTok Subscribe to our YouTube Channel To advertise on the show, contact sales@advertisecast.com or visit https://advertising.libsyn.com/10HappierwithDanHarris

3 Aug 26min

How To Find Joy In an Anxious World | Sara Bareilles and Dacher Keltner

How To Find Joy In an Anxious World | Sara Bareilles and Dacher Keltner

A conversation with singer-songwriter Sara Bareilles and psychologist Dacher Keltner, recorded at the New York Times Well Festival, moderated by Dan. All three of them have dealt with anxiety and continue to work with it, and they discuss the ways they look for joy and sustainable wellness.  Related Episodes: Sara Bareilles: Anxiety, Anger, and Art The Evolutionary Case for Kindness | Dacher Keltner This Scientist Says One Emotion May Be the Key to Happiness. Can You Guess What It Is? | Dacher Keltner   Get ready for another Meditation Party at Omega Institute! This in-person workshop brings together Dan with his friends and meditation teachers, Sebene Selassie, Jeff Warren, and for the first time, Ofosu Jones-Quartey. The event runs October 24th-26th. Sign up and learn more at eomega.org/workshops/meditation-party-2025.   Join Dan’s online community here Follow Dan on social: Instagram, TikTok Subscribe to our YouTube Channel To advertise on the show, contact sales@advertisecast.com or visit https://advertising.libsyn.com/10HappierwithDanHarris

1 Aug 33min

Anxious? Confused? Powerless? A Four-Part Recipe for Staying Centered From a Buddhist Nun. | Ayya Anandabodhi

Anxious? Confused? Powerless? A Four-Part Recipe for Staying Centered From a Buddhist Nun. | Ayya Anandabodhi

Reclaim your power from the news, booze, shopping, or denial. Ayya Anandabodhi is the spiritual director of Pārāyana Vihāra, a monastic residence in Port Townsend, WA. She was raised in Wales, in the UK, and first encountered Buddhism in her early teens and began training as a nun at age 24. You can listen to some of her Dharma talks, here.    In this episode we talk about: What centering means – and how to do it in the midst of chaos or calamity (Including some very practical tips) The difference between centering vs equanimity  How to break out of old patterns  The power of pausing How anger is justified, but it doesn’t help A quick but deep dive into the Four Noble truths, a foundational Buddhist list We tackle the tricky topic of “true nature” We talk about the vital role of that treacly and often misunderstood term, compassion   Join Dan’s online community here Follow Dan on social: Instagram, TikTok Subscribe to our YouTube Channel To advertise on the show, contact sales@advertisecast.com or visit https://advertising.libsyn.com/10HappierwithDanHarris

30 Jul 1h 5min

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