The Opposite of Schadenfreude | Election Sanity Series | Tuere Sala

The Opposite of Schadenfreude | Election Sanity Series | Tuere Sala

There’s an old expression: “Every time a friend succeeds, I die a little bit.” I love that saying, because it speaks to how hard it can be to take pleasure in other people’s happiness. That said, while it may be difficult, it is not impossible -- and moreover, as our guest today will argue, it’s a massively useful skill, especially as we endure this bonkers election. Welcome to week three of our special Election Sanity podcast series. Every Monday in October, we’re tackling a mental skill drawn from an ancient Buddhist list known as the Four Brahma Viharas, or the Four Heavenly Abodes. Don’t be fooled by the high falutin’ name; these skills are eminently achievable, and massively helpful. I can say this based on both personal experience, and also a significant amount of scientific research. In the previous two episodes, we explored loving-kindness (also known by the less gooey moniker of “friendliness”), and also compassion. This week it’s “sympathetic joy,” or “mudita.” You can think of this skill as the opposite of Schadenfreude; instead of reveling in the suffering of other people, you’re celebrating their happiness. Our guest today calls it “borrowing joy.” Her name is Tuere Sala. She’s a guiding teacher at Insight Seattle. She’s no pollyanna; she doesn’t sugarcoat how challenging mudita can be, but she does have a strategy that I think you will find appealingly doable. Where to find Tuere Sala online: Seattle Insight Meditation Society: https://seattleinsight.org/Teachers/Teacher/TeacherID/102 Just a reminder, our Free Election Sanity meditation challenge starts next week. We're super excited about this one—we've worked with our very wise meditation teachers from this Election Sanity podcast series to create a really unique set of daily lessons and meditations, all geared toward helping you keep your cool during the 2020 Election. If you'd like to join the Challenge, Download the Ten Percent Happier app today to start meditating your way through this Election season, and see you in the Challenge with thousands of other meditators. It starts on Tuesday, October 27th! Full Shownotes: https://www.tenpercent.com/podcast-episode/tuere-sala-292

Episoder(902)

What Distraction Does to Your Brain—and How To Regain Cognitive Control | Adam Gazzaley

What Distraction Does to Your Brain—and How To Regain Cognitive Control | Adam Gazzaley

Distraction is making you anxious and sleepless. Here’s how to fix it.   Adam Gazzaley, M.D., Ph.D. is the David Dolby Distinguished Professor of Neurology, Physiology and Psychiatry, and Founder & Executive Director of Neuroscape at UCSF. He co-authored the 2016 book “The Distracted Mind: Ancient Brains in a High-Tech World”.    In this episode we talk about: The impact of multitasking on our attention, relationships, emotions, anxiety, and memory The difference between top-down and bottom-up attention What it means to have cognitive control—and some practical tools for restoring your own cognitive control.  Controversial technologies that could eventually help us have a stronger brain The impact of music and rhythm on the mind And how to use technology for your brain’s benefit   Join Dan’s online community here Follow Dan on social: Instagram, TikTok Subscribe to our YouTube Channel

26 Mai 1h 13min

A Simple Guided Meditation from Dan | Live from the Renegade Sangha

A Simple Guided Meditation from Dan | Live from the Renegade Sangha

We asked not too long ago in the chat on our Substack community – which you can find at DanHarris.com – about what kinds of things you’d find useful as Friday bonus episodes, and one of the things we heard was: more guided meditations, please. So today, we are happy to oblige with this short meditation that I led, as part of our semi-regular live gatherings of the Renegade Sangha on Substack. Twice a month, paid subscribers are invited to join me, live, for a little guided meditation, then I take your questions. It’s been so much fun to hear from you, and to help you hear from each other.  Today’s guided meditation is taken from our sangha gathering on April 23. It’s super simple and good for both beginners and experienced meditators alike.  If you enjoyed that and would like more opportunities to meditate together, here’s what we’ve got coming up for you in June:  on the podcast, we’re bringing back our series Get Fit Sanely, where we talk about how to take care of your body without losing your mind – you’ll hear about nutrition, exercise, rest, and more, all with a lens of self-compassion and we’re super excited about this: friend of the pod and ace meditation teacher Cara Lai will be creating a month of bespoke meditations, each one tailored to an episode of the podcast, exclusively for paid subscribers at DanHarris.com. This is something we’ve been wanting to offer for a long time and I’m thrilled that we’re finally doing it. Visit DanHarris.com for all the details

23 Mai 13min

Why Self-Hatred Makes No Sense | Matthew Brensilver

Why Self-Hatred Makes No Sense | Matthew Brensilver

This episode explores a compelling Buddhist question: does self-hatred, or self-love, make sense if the self is an illusion? Matthew Brensilver, PhD, is a clinical social worker and experienced teacher of meditation retreats. He also worked at an organization called Mindful Schools, which teaches teachers how to teach meditation.  This episode also explores: How and why to view your anger with skepticism The relationship between self-love and personal ethics What to do if you think you’re a good person but have no interest in changing your behavior to get better How to handle a nagging sense of moral un-justifiability And how Matthew has arrived at a place of relative peace with his own mortality. Join Dan’s online community here Follow Dan on social: Instagram, TikTok Subscribe to our YouTube Channel

21 Mai 1h 4min

That Feeling of “Always-Behind and Never-Enough”—Here’s the Antidote | Ellen Hendriksen

That Feeling of “Always-Behind and Never-Enough”—Here’s the Antidote | Ellen Hendriksen

How to beat perfectionism without lowering your standards.   Dr. Ellen Hendriksen is a clinical psychologist who will help you calm your anxiety and be your authentic self. She serves on the faculty at Boston University's Center for Anxiety and Related Disorders (CARD) and is the author of HOW TO BE ENOUGH: Self-Acceptance for Self-Critics and Perfectionists and HOW TO BE YOURSELF: Quiet Your Inner Critic and Rise Above Social Anxiety.   In this episode we talk about: The relationship between perfectionism and anxiety The definition of perfectionism–and why the word is actually a misnomer Dr. Hendriksen’s own struggles with perfectionism, and how they manifested physically The difference between healthy perfectionism and unhealthy perfectionism Changing your relationship with your inner critic  Shifting from rigid rules to flexibility Keeping high standards while making room for mistakes Overcoming procrastination Navigating social comparison And much more   Related Episodes: Strategies for Social Anxiety | Ellen Hendriksen Ellen Hendriksen, Rising Above Social Anxiety The Voice in Your Head | Ethan Kross  How To Move Into The Future With Optimism Instead Of Anxiety | Frederik Pferdt   Join Dan’s online community here Follow Dan on social: Instagram, TikTok Subscribe to our YouTube Channel   Additional Resources:   Ellen Hendriksen on Substack

19 Mai 1h 6min

From Proxy: Mic Chooses the Wrong Life

From Proxy: Mic Chooses the Wrong Life

We’re excited to share with you an episode of the new podcast Proxy, produced by Yowei Shaw. Today: the case of Mic, who feels like he defied his fate and now has no purpose in life. For her new podcast Proxy, Yowei Shaw finds someone uniquely able to help Mic break out of his regret loop. Proxy is a show that investigates niche emotional conundrums through conversations with strangers who have relevant experience. New cases every other Tuesday. You can binge episodes now in the Proxy feed.

18 Mai 51min

If You’re Freaking Out About Politics | Bonus Episode with Dan

If You’re Freaking Out About Politics | Bonus Episode with Dan

A few ideas for staying sane in insane times, regardless of your political leanings or who you voted for. Related episode: Joseph Goldstein On: Impermanence, Impersonality, And How To Use Mindfulness To Be More Creative Joseph Goldstein’s book of poetry: Dreamscapes of the Mind   Sign up for Dan’s newsletter here Follow Dan on social: Instagram, TikTok Subscribe to our YouTube Channel

16 Mai 11min

How To Improve Critical Thinking, Embrace Uncertainty, and Stop Self-Censoring | Jenara Nerenberg

How To Improve Critical Thinking, Embrace Uncertainty, and Stop Self-Censoring | Jenara Nerenberg

Plus how to speak up and challenge your own tribe, how to successfully engage with people you disagree with, and more.   Jenara Nerenberg is a journalist and author. Her latest book is called Trust Your Mind: Embracing Nuance in a World of Self-Silencing. She holds degrees from the Harvard School of Public Health and UC Berkeley. She lectures widely on rhetoric, psychology, neurodiversity, sensitivity, innovation and communication.  In this episode we talk about: The phenomenon of groupthink—and its health implications The health implications of self-censoring Vulnerability in the age of social media The role of comedy in pushing back against social norms Sign up for Dan’s newsletter here Follow Dan on social: Instagram, TikTok Ten Percent Happier online bookstore Subscribe to our YouTube Channel Our favorite playlists on: Anxiety, Sleep, Relationships, Most Popular Episodes

14 Mai 1h 7min

If It’s Hysterical, It’s Historical: The Liberating Power of Understanding Your Past | Dr. Orna Guralnik

If It’s Hysterical, It’s Historical: The Liberating Power of Understanding Your Past | Dr. Orna Guralnik

On psychoanalysis, which we haven’t talked about much on this show.   Dr. Orna Guralnik is a psychoanalyst and writer. Her writing centers on the intersection of psychoanalysis, dissociation, and cultural studies. She has completed the filming of several seasons of the docu-series Couples Therapy. In this episode we talk about: The relationship between happiness and truth  How to cultivate love from within Practices to support us in being more open-minded (to avoid what she calls a “splitting” mindset) Trans-generational history, and how it impacts our personal lives and relationships (in other words, how the ghosts of your ancestors operate in you now) One single, powerful question to ask yourself when you get annoyed The overlap between Buddhism and psychoanalysis Related Episodes: Why Your Brain Turns The Miraculous Into The Mundane—And How To Fix It | Maria Popova George Saunders on: “Holy Befuddlement” and How to Be Less of a “Turd” The Profound Upside of Self-Diminishment | George Saunders Sign up for Dan’s newsletter here Follow Dan on social: Instagram, TikTok Ten Percent Happier online bookstore Subscribe to our YouTube Channel Our favorite playlists on: Anxiety, Sleep, Relationships, Most Popular Episodes

12 Mai 1h 11min

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