How I Get What I Want: Navigating Desire, Power and Contentment

Can moving to a tropical paradise truly transform your life? I found myself drawn to Bali after a period of burnout, yearning for a slower rhythm amidst nature. I would travel overseas to see my clients and communities once a month. But my idyllic existence quickly gave way to a harsher reality when borders shut for COVID, and I filled the gap by launching myself into the local expat community. Venture with me as I discover a realm of sex coaches and their tantric swinger nights, lost start up founders and their cold plunges and a healthy mass of the generally dysfunctional. I also land myself in the midst of corruption, theft and a growing awareness of the injustice that underpins the islands existence; and spoiler alert, I eventually leave to find a kink community that satisfies what I am looking for, for now… More on Eva Oh: https://eva-oh.com HIGHLIGHTS: Here are the timestamps for the episode. On some podcast players you should be able to click the timestamp to jump to that time. (00:15) - Why Bali? (01:35) - My Jungle Home (03:05) - Healing a Burnout (04:00) - Naivety Against Corruption and Wealth Inequality (05:50) - Moving to Canggu (08:02) - The Exoticisation of the Other (09:00) - Running Away (10:15) - Misogyny and Safety (11:05) - Corruption (12:05) - Dysfunction (14:20) - The Bali Kink Community (16:25) - The London Kink Community (17:05) - What is a Life Coach? (17:50) - Sex Coaches (18:50) - Tantric Temple Swinger Nights (19:50) - Loneliness and Cold Plunges (20:10) - Start-up Founders and Finding Themselves (24:00) - Discovering What I Actually Needed (28:00) - I Just Want to Fit In?

24 Okt 202330min

For years, I lived a double life. My conservative, Christian mother knew nothing of my profession as a Dominatrix until a revelation seven years in the making unfolded, with surprising results. In this candid, personal episode, I share about the fear, the tension, and ultimately the liberation that came with breaking my silence. I explore the delicate dance of withholding the truth, the strain it put on my relationship with my mother, and the unexpected acceptance that emerged. Disclaimer: Some long pauses towards the end due to tears :) More on Eva Oh: https://eva-oh.com HIGHLIGHTS: Here are the timestamps for the episode. On some podcast players you should be able to click the timestamp to jump to that time. (00:00) - Welcome. What is #teakink (00:15) - Coming Out to Mum About Being a Dominatrix (01:35) - Bible Study, Christianity, Conservatism (03:55) - Hiding My Job and What it Did to Our Relationship (04:40) - Why Did I Tell Her After 7 Years? (05:30) - Sex Worker Friendly Therapy (07:15) - Planning the Coming Out (08:30) - Executing the Plan, Not As Expected (10:04) - Mum’s Questions About the Job (12:15) - My Answers (16:16) - My Mother’s Insight, Humour and Compassion (20:15) - How The Coming Out Settled

17 Okt 202321min

Ever wondered how people respond to a woman who chooses an unconventional path for her livelihood? I once met a man so profoundly disturbed by my line of work, he became aggressive and then splurged on two million dollars worth of watches to soothe himself. What does it mean to face aggression and intimidation, not as a result of any personal wrong-doing, but merely from the threat your profession poses to societal norms? On this episode of the #teakink Podcast we explore the array of reactions I’ve received as a Dominatrix. We discuss how these responses are shaped by societal expectations and how I’ve learned to navigate them. This conversation serves as a deep reminder of how society struggles with open discussions around sexuality and the unique strength it takes to be a woman who doesn't back down in the face of such intimidation. More on Eva Oh: https://eva-oh.com HIGHLIGHTS: Here are the timestamps for the episode. On some podcast players you should be able to click the timestamp to jump to that time.(00:00) - Welcome. What is #teakink(00:15) - Meeting Men Who React Poorly to Assertive Women(02:50) - Common Ways They React(03:30) - Why It is Unsettling for Them(05:00) - Two Million Dollars Worth of Ego Soothing(06:15) - Managing Society’s Sexual Hangups(07:45) - The First Time I Came Out at a Dinner Party(10:35) - Friends’ Reactions(12:15) - How I Handle Reactions, Then and Now(12:55) - The Job as a Filter(13:45) - From Disapproval to Understanding(15:35) - Women’s Reactions and Anger(17:10) - Society’s Suffering and Their Resulting Projections on my Job(21:45) - Puritanical Values That Go Unquestioned(24:20) - You Are Not Free. That is The Problem(25:25) - Meaning and Purpose

10 Okt 202326min

I, Eva Oh, have found myself at a crossroads - TV show proposals, brand collaborations, and even the prospect of becoming an AI companion have me reflecting on the trajectory of my unconventional career. On this episode I delve deep into the pros and cons; and why now, more than ever, there's a sudden interest in stories like mine. My choices today will reshape the narrative of my life tomorrow, and that's a responsibility I do not take lightly. So, come along as I contemplate the chaos and ponder over whether it's the right time for me - a Dominatrix - to step into the mainstream. More on Eva Oh: https://eva-oh.com HIGHLIGHTS: Here are the timestamps for the episode. On some podcast players you should be able to click the timestamp to jump to that time. (00:00) - Welcome. What is #teakink (00:15) - TV Producers, Talent Managers and Agents Approaching (01:40) - Why Would a Sex Worker Say Yes? (02:20) - What Disgusts Me About the Idea (03:50) - My Words and Voice (05:05) - What I Enjoy About Interviews (06:30) - Why the Media are Interested in Representing Sex Workers Now (08:20) - How Should I Join the Narrative? (08:44) - From Dominatrix to Executive Producer (10:30) - Sex Workers Mistrust of the Media (11:10) - Seeing it as an Opportunity (11:55) - TV Hesitation vs AI Enthusiasm (12:30) - The Chaos of Sex Worker Meets Influencer Culture (14:25) - How Meditation Plays it's Part (15:25) - Embracing the Chaos (16:30) - Am I a Sell Out? (18:10) - Community and Personal Gain (18:55) - The Case for RuPaul’s Drag Race (22:55) - Am I Going to Regret This? (24:00) - Self-compassion

3 Okt 202326min

I’ve had some trouble working and playing with couples since I first started working as a Dominatrix in 2011. In this episode, hear the story of Fisting Bob, a regular at the dungeon I used to work in, and the strange turns our professional relationship took when I started getting letters from his wife. Follow me into the Piss Pit at Berghain with two dear friends of mine who may have rescued my faith in playing with couples. Find out more about the exploration of our desires and how the BDSM community can give space to the negotiation that can facilitate their satiation. Watch me rethink my past and maybe reframe the opinion that started this episode in the first place. More on Eva Oh: https://eva-oh.com HIGHLIGHTS: Here are the timestamps for the episode. On some podcast players you should be able to click the timestamp to jump to that time. (00:00) - Welcome. What is #teakink (00:15) - What is a Relationship Unicorn? (00:52) - Meet Fisting Bob (07:06) - A Bad Decision? (15:13) - Exploring Desires and Negotiating Boundaries (16:59) - The Piss Pit at Berghain (24:00) - Reflections on Reacting and Seeking Reassurance (27:21) - Changing My Perception on Being a Unicorn

26 Sep 202328min

Curious about the intriguing world of a Dominatrix and it's relationship to money? Listen in as I discuss the evolution of my rates, the rationale behind the changes, and the crucial balance between wealth accumulation and personal values. I also share the peaks and troughs of my career, including dealing with overwork and burnout, and how and why I pivoted to provide my clients rich, relationship-driven experiences. We will navigate the potential relationship between money and isolation, and how wealth can sometimes create a divide from reality. I also shed light on the importance of wealth redistribution, especially when it's in the hands of women. Let's redefine the power dynamics of wealth together. More on Eva Oh: https://eva-oh.com HIGHLIGHTS: Here are the timestamps for the episode. On some podcast players you should be able to click the timestamp to jump to that time. (00:00) - Welcome. What is #teakink (00:15) - I Like Taking Money From Rich Men (01:01) - Should Anyone Be This Rich? (01:30) - The Evolution of My Rates (04:30) - Burnout as a Catalyst (07:00) - Wealth and Fairness (08:50) - Valuing Ourselves (10:55) - The Sexism in Money, The Caring Industries (12:15) - Ar*sehole Tax (15:20) - What is Money? (16:20) - My Relationship to Work, Money and Self-Care (19:55) - Reprogramming my Wealthy Clients (25:13) - Freedom, Wealth Redistribution, and Women's Impact LINKS: Financial Literacy, https://www.investopedia.com/guide-to-financial-literacy-4800530 UN Women, Economic Impact - https://www.unwomen.org/en/what-we-do/economic-empowerment/facts-and-figures TED Talk - How Economic Inequality Harms Societies, https://www.ted.com/talks/richard_wilkinson_how_economic_inequality_harms_societies?utm_campaign=tedspread&utm_medium=referral&utm_source=tedcomshare TED Talk - Universal Basic Income, https://www.ted.com/talks/steven_shafarman_the_case_for_universal_basic_income?utm_campaign=tedspread&utm_medium=referral&utm_source=tedcomshare

19 Sep 202327min

Curious about how a Dominatrix runs her business? Join me on a revealing journey into the sex work industry. As a Dominatrix since 2011, I'll uncover the complexities, from bookings to emotional labor. This episode goes beyond sessions, touching on banking challenges, service gaps, and the role of sex worker organizations. Discover the resilience that drives us forward. Despite hurdles, I'll explain why this profession brings me a unique gratification. More on Eva Oh: https://eva-oh.com HIGHLIGHTS: Here are the timestamps for the episode. On some podcast players you should be able to click the timestamp to jump to that time. (00:00) - Welcome. What is #teakink (00:15) - The Scope of My Job (01:45) - The Interest in Sex Work (02:40) - The Intricacies and Evolution of My Work Responsibilities (04:50) - What a Receptionist Shielded Me From (09:30) - Why I Do Sex Work Despite the Challenges (11:05) - Dungeon vs Indie (11:50) - Navigating Societal Stigma (12:30) - Marketing and Perceiving Yourself (14:00) - Navigating Space and Community Challenges (15:55) - Interpersonal Session Skills (17:00) - Feeling Safe in My Workplace vs In Public, Workplace Wins (20:05) - Financial Exclusion and Structural Violence in Banking for Sex Workers (25:45) - The Power of Resilience, Community and You (27:43) - My Internship at a Sex Work Organisation (28:30) - Learning About the Backpage Shutdown Impact on Sex Workers (30:00) - The Data for Decriminalisation by Amnesty International vs Puritanism (31:17) - Why I Love My Job LINKS: Amnesty International publishes policy and research on protection of sex workers’ rights, https://www.amnesty.org/en/latest/news/2016/05/amnesty-international-publishes-policy-and-research-on-protection-of-sex-workers-rights/ Human Rights Watch, Why Sex Work Should Be Decriminalized, https://www.hrw.org/news/2019/08/07/why-sex-work-should-be-decriminalized ‘Global Network of Sex Work Projects’, https://www.nswp.org

12 Sep 202332min