Master Your Marriage29 Mar 2023

What's the #1 Relationship Poison?

Have you ever felt put down, mocked, belittled, shamed, or called names in what you thought was a 'loving' relationship? Or have you perhaps been guilty of sarcasm, eye-rolling, and passive-aggressive communication that has slowly poisoned a relationship that you didn't mean to?

Sharla and Robert are discussing the number one predictor for a divorce: contempt. Once this poison sets in, divorce, on average, happens in about 6 years. Trust us, you're going to want to listen to this episode to the end to fix this problem and save your relationship.

Was contempt a part of the way your family communicated growing up? Do you know that you're being triggered by the person you love but feel incapable of change? Solutions are at hand in this sublime episode of Master Your Marriage that takes contempt by the scruff of its neck and empathetically shows you how to overcome those feelings with five easy steps.

"Contempt is the kiss of death for a relationship." ~ Sharla Snow

In This Episode:

- Understanding contempt as the 'sulfuric acid' of relationships

- Examples of contempt in everyday relationships

- How contempt leads to more contempt – and defensiveness

- What to do when contempt starts as an automatic reaction to an issue

- What helped Sharla overcome her contempt? A process of empathy

- Five steps to help overcome your own contempt

And so much more!

Resources:

-Overcoming Contempt Cheatsheet

- 8 Pillars Of An Exceptional Marriage

- MYM 8-Week Coaching Program - https://masteryourmarriagepodcast.com/MYM423

- Flow: The Psychology of Optimal Experience

Connect with Robert and Sharla Snow:

- Website: http://masteryourmarriagepodcast.com/

- Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/masteryourmarriage/

- Facebook - http://facebook.com/masteryourmarriage

- TikTok - https://www.tiktok.com/@masteryourmarriage

Denne episoden er hentet fra en åpen RSS-feed og er ikke publisert av Podme. Den kan derfor inneholde annonser.

Episoder(177)

Why You Manage Their Mood Instead of Your Own

Last week we talked about anxiety as a response to a real or imagined threat. How we make our partner the threat. How reactivity is the anxiety.This week is the question underneath that: why does thei...

10 Sep 25min

When Your Partner Feels Like a Threat - Relationship Anxiety Explained

If you don’t think you have anxiety, this episode is probably for you.A lot of us hear “anxiety” and picture someone who worries all day and imagines every disaster. That is not how it usually shows u...

3 Sep 29min

Why “AND” Changes Hard Conversations

One of the smallest words in English can quietly change the emotional climate of a marriage.In this episode, we talk about the difference between “but” and “and.” “But” often cancels whatever came bef...

26 Aug 22min

Empathy: The Antidote to Contempt

We just spent two episodes looking at contempt—the number one predictor of divorce. One of the clearest takeaways is this: empathy and contempt cannot live in the same room.When contempt is operating,...

19 Aug 33min

How to Build a Contempt-Free Marriage -- Contempt is the #1 predictor of divorce!

Last week we named the problem: contempt is addictive, corrosive, and the #1 predictor of divorce. This week we take up the harder question—how do we actually walk away from it?We open with an honest ...

12 Aug 29min

The Addiction of Contempt

In this episode, we unpack one of the most destructive forces in modern relationships: contempt.Drawing from Arthur Brooks’ book Love Your Enemies, we explore why contempt is not just a communication ...

29 Jul 31min

Breaking the Silent Treatment: How to End the Silence and Reconnect in Your Marriage

We’ve all heard (or said) those loaded words: “We need to talk.” For most of us, they immediately trigger defensiveness and dread. But what happens when conversations stop altogether? In this replay e...

22 Jul 24min

Defensiveness Is a Self-Esteem Problem - And How to Fix It

Most of us get defensive without even realizing it — and it’s one of the fastest ways connection breaks down in marriage. In this episode, we explore why defensiveness is actually a self-esteem issue ...

16 Jul 30min