The Sunday Read: ‘How I Learned That the Problem in My Marriage Was Me’
The Daily9 Mar

The Sunday Read: ‘How I Learned That the Problem in My Marriage Was Me’

One thing I’ve learned from being married to my wife, Jess, who is a couples therapist, is how vast the distance is between the masks people show to the world and the messy realities that live behind them. Every couple knows its own drama, but we still fall prey to the illusion that all other couples have seamlessly satisfying relationships. The truth about marriage — including my own — is that even the most functional couples are merely doing the best they can with the lives that have been bestowed on them.

This past spring, Jess and I had the first of eight sessions of couples therapy with Terry Real, a best-selling author and by far the most famous of the therapists we’ve seen during our marriage. Real, whose admirers include Gwyneth Paltrow and Bruce Springsteen, is one of a small number of thinkers who are actively shaping how the couples-therapy field is received by the public and practiced by other therapists. He is also the bluntest and most charismatic of the therapists I’ve seen, the New Jersey Jewish version of Robin Williams’s irascible Boston character in “Good Will Hunting” — profane, charismatic, open about his own life, forged in his own story of pain.

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Episoder(2675)

Wednesday, July 12, 2017

Wednesday, July 12, 2017

The Times obtains Donald Trump Jr.’s emails about an offer of help from the Russian government. “I love it,” he wrote. The story behind the story, and what we mean when we talk about “collusion.” And the scene from the Iraqi city of Mosul: What Islamic State militants left behind. Guests: Matt Apuzzo, one of the reporters who broke the story about Donald Trump Jr.’s emails; Rukmini Callimachi, who covers the Islamic State, and Andy Mills, a producer with her in Mosul. For more information on today’s episode, visit http://nyti.ms/2sPxzbb. Subscribe today at nytimes.com/podcasts or on Apple Podcasts and Spotify. You can also subscribe via your favorite podcast app here https://www.nytimes.com/activate-access/audio?source=podcatcher. For more podcasts and narrated articles, download The New York Times app at nytimes.com/app.

12 Jul 201723min

Tuesday, July 11, 2017

Tuesday, July 11, 2017

A music producer. A lawyer from Moscow. The Miss Universe pageant. And now: the promise of help from the Russian government. We connect the dots on Donald Trump Jr.’s communications last summer. And what happens when thousands of rebel fighters try to re-enter society as civilians? Guests: Mark Mazzetti, our Washington investigations editor; Nicholas Casey, a correspondent based in South America. For more information on today’s episode, visit http://nyti.ms/2uddQ9d. Subscribe today at nytimes.com/podcasts or on Apple Podcasts and Spotify. You can also subscribe via your favorite podcast app here https://www.nytimes.com/activate-access/audio?source=podcatcher. For more podcasts and narrated articles, download The New York Times app at nytimes.com/app.

11 Jul 201722min

Monday, July 10, 2017

Monday, July 10, 2017

What we know about a newly revealed meeting between Donald Trump Jr. and a Russian lawyer. Plus, the view from the ground in the Iraqi city of Mosul. Guests: Adam Goldman, one of the reporters behind the revelations about the meeting at Trump Tower in June 2016; Rukmini Callimachi, who is in Mosul reporting on the fall of the Islamic State militant group there. For more information on today’s episode, visit http://nyti.ms/2uHO4r6. Subscribe today at nytimes.com/podcasts or on Apple Podcasts and Spotify. You can also subscribe via your favorite podcast app here https://www.nytimes.com/activate-access/audio?source=podcatcher. For more podcasts and narrated articles, download The New York Times app at nytimes.com/app.

10 Jul 201719min

Friday, July 7, 2017

Friday, July 7, 2017

Donald J. Trump’s life and career have been defined by his legal battles. But what will they mean for his presidency? Guest: Jonathan Mahler, staff writer for The New York Times Magazine; Jay Goldberg, Mr. Trump’s exclusive litigator from 1990 to 2005. For more information on today’s episode, visit http://nyti.ms/2tHoXq1. Subscribe today at nytimes.com/podcasts or on Apple Podcasts and Spotify. You can also subscribe via your favorite podcast app here https://www.nytimes.com/activate-access/audio?source=podcatcher. For more podcasts and narrated articles, download The New York Times app at nytimes.com/app.

7 Jul 201721min

Thursday, July 6, 2017

Thursday, July 6, 2017

North Korea’s test of a missile that could potentially strike Alaska has crossed a line, and underscores a dilemma for President Trump and his national security team. Also, how the battle over health care is playing out in Kentucky. Guests: David E. Sanger, chief Washington correspondent for The New York Times; Sheryl Gay Stolberg, domestic affairs correspondent; Kathy Collins, a Kentucky resident who relies on Medicaid. For more information on today’s episode, visit http://nyti.ms/2ssEaII. Subscribe today at nytimes.com/podcasts or on Apple Podcasts and Spotify. You can also subscribe via your favorite podcast app here https://www.nytimes.com/activate-access/audio?source=podcatcher. For more podcasts and narrated articles, download The New York Times app at nytimes.com/app.

6 Jul 201720min

Wednesday, July 5, 2017

Wednesday, July 5, 2017

When Medicaid was created in 1965, it was barely discussed. But now it’s so big — and so popular — that a proposal to roll it back could sink the Republican plan to repeal the Affordable Care Act. Guests: Kate Zernike, a Times reporter. For more information on today’s episode, visit http://nyti.ms/2tdjJ1C. Subscribe today at nytimes.com/podcasts or on Apple Podcasts and Spotify. You can also subscribe via your favorite podcast app here https://www.nytimes.com/activate-access/audio?source=podcatcher. For more podcasts and narrated articles, download The New York Times app at nytimes.com/app.

5 Jul 201715min

Friday, June 30, 2017

Friday, June 30, 2017

As a limited travel ban goes into effect, the Trump administration has defined what constitutes a “bona fide” relationship: who’s close family, and who’s not, for visitors from six predominantly Muslim nations. Guests: Michael D. Shear, White House correspondent for The New York Times, and Suzanne Ramazani, who is planning a wedding and worries that her Iranian relatives won’t be able to attend. For more information on today’s episode, visit http://nyti.ms/2udDieF. Subscribe today at nytimes.com/podcasts or on Apple Podcasts and Spotify. You can also subscribe via your favorite podcast app here https://www.nytimes.com/activate-access/audio?source=podcatcher. For more podcasts and narrated articles, download The New York Times app at nytimes.com/app.

30 Jun 201719min

Thursday, June 29, 2017

Thursday, June 29, 2017

The United States says its goal in Syria is to help its allies defeat the Islamic State, not to fight the government. But it’s getting harder stay out of the civil war. Guests: Helene Cooper, the Pentagon correspondent for The New York Times; Jennifer Steinhauer, who covers Congress. For more information on today’s episode, visit http://nyti.ms/2tdgVBP. Subscribe today at nytimes.com/podcasts or on Apple Podcasts and Spotify. You can also subscribe via your favorite podcast app here https://www.nytimes.com/activate-access/audio?source=podcatcher. For more podcasts and narrated articles, download The New York Times app at nytimes.com/app.

29 Jun 201720min

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