The Weight of Shame: Gay, Latinx, and Finding Your Way Back to Yourself – Lucas Saiter

How do you balance faith, sexuality, and life—without losing your mind? Finding the just right path to authenticity can feel overwhelming, even chaotic. But here’s the truth: authenticity is a journey, not a destination. And living your most fulfilled life as a gay, Jewish Rabbi (or whoever you are) is exactly the path you’re meant to walk. Joining the conversation today is Rabbi Steven Greenberg—author of Wrestling with God and Men: Homosexuality in the Jewish Tradition and founder of Eshel, an Orthodox LGBTQ+ advocacy and support organization. He’s here to share his wisdom on embracing all of who you are and aligning faith, identity, and purpose as a Jewish queer man. Key lessons you'll learn: What does authenticity mean to you and how to live and define it on your terms Keys for embracing your Jewish (or other faith-based self) with your gayness How to get support from Eshel if you desire it About Steve Rabbi Steven Greenberg is an educator, writer and speaker who has led the call for LGBTQ+ inclusion in the Orthodox world. He is the author of Wrestling with God and Men: Homosexuality in the Jewish Tradition, (University of Wisconsin Press) for which he won the Koret Jewish Book Award for Philosophy and Thought in 2005. Rabbi Greenberg is presently the Founding Director of Eshel, an Orthodox LGBTQ+ community support, education and advocacy organization and lives with his partner, Steven Goldstein, and daughter, Amalia, in Boston. Connect With Steve Website Facebook Instagram Hey Guys, Check This Out! Are you a guy who keeps struggling to do that thing? You know the thing you keep telling yourself and others you’re going to do, but never do? Then it’s time to get real and figure out why. Join the 40 Plus: Gay Men Gay Talk, monthly chats. They happen the third Monday of each month at 5:00 pm Pacific - Learn More! Also, join our Facebook Community - 40 Plus: Gay Men, Gay Talk Community Break free of fears. Make bold moves. Live life without apologies

7 Mar 41min

HIV may be a lifelong journey, but it is not a death sentence. Yet, for Black gay men, that journey often comes with unique challenges—stigma, erasure, and systemic barriers that make living openly and authentically even harder. As we close out Black History Month, we sit down with Jordan J. Edwards - Deputy Director for the Normal Anomaly Initiative, whose candid and unfiltered approach will challenge you to see beyond limitations and embrace the power of your own visibility. In this episode, you’ll: Uncover the difference between representation and representing yourself—a game-changing distinction Learn why visibility is crucial in the fight for queer and Black liberation—and how you can take action Discover ways to ensure your story and existence aren’t erased by society This is a conversation about truth, resilience, and reclaiming space. About Jordan Jordan J Edwards (He/Him/His) is a Deputy Director for the Normal Anomaly Initiative. Through his passion and lived experience as a person living with HIV,  Jordan serves the Black, Queer plus community by developing curriculum, increasing opportunities for transportation, and linkage to care services for those living with HIV and those interested in PrEP. Jordan became a 2024 White House Rising Leader and a Greater Than HIV Ambassador through his development in the HIV sector. Connect With Jordan Website Jordan's Instagram The Normal Anomaly Instagram Hey Guys, Check This Out! Are you a guy who keeps struggling to do that thing? You know the thing you keep telling yourself and others you’re going to do, but never do? Then it’s time to get real and figure out why. Join the 40 Plus: Gay Men Gay Talk, monthly chats. They happen the third Monday of each month at 5:00 pm Pacific - Learn More! Also, join our Facebook Community - 40 Plus: Gay Men, Gay Talk Community Break free of fears. Make bold moves. Live life without apologies

28 Feb 45min

Black gay men don't feel safe talking about this? That includes a lot of territory. But why do they feel this way? It's because of the double margins they experience and then add to it familial socializing and you've got the perfect reason black, gay, men struggle to show themselves fully in society. Visionary leader, host and founder Dear Black Gay Men podcast, Jai The Gentleman joins me today for a raw, candid, chat about being black and gay on the planet. Key lessons you'll learn: How black men get lost in the sauce and learn to hide their truth Gain a glimpse into most inspiring lessons Jai learned from his family to make him the gay man he is today Discover how create spaces where everyone is included - regardless of their skin color About Jai The Gentleman Under the visionary leadership of host and founder Jai The Gentleman, the Dear Black Gay Men podcast has gained a loyal and growing audience across the nation, with each episode offering a candid, humorous, and always insightful look at life through the lens of Black queer identity. Dear Black Gay Men emerged as Jai’s love letter to every hopeful single who yearns for genuine connection and understanding. Jai amplifies the voices and experiences of Black gay men through raw, authentic content and conversations free from taboo, and his national platform has become a trusted space where no topic is off-limits, fostering open discussions on everything from love and relationships to mental health, identity, and self-empowerment. Connect With Jai The Gentleman Website Podcast Instagram Facebook Banned book club Hey Guys, Check This Out! Are you a guy who keeps struggling to do that thing? You know the thing you keep telling yourself and others you’re going to do, but never do? Then it’s time to get real and figure out why. Join the 40 Plus: Gay Men Gay Talk, monthly chats. They happen the third Monday of each month at 5:00 pm Pacific - Learn More! Also, join our Facebook Community - 40 Plus: Gay Men, Gay Talk Community Break free of fears. Make bold moves. Live life without apologies

21 Feb 52min

Open relationships for gay men: a recipe for disaster or the key to thriving love? This week, we’re breaking it all down! Join me and Dr. Wade Maggert as we explore: Why monogamy might not be your vibe (and that’s okay!) How to set rules and boundaries that actually work Understanding your attachment style so you can thrive, whether you’re open, poly, or somewhere in between. It’s time to break free from outdated ideas and discover what works for YOU. Tune in for laughs, insights, and real talk. About Wade Dr. Wade Maggert, esteemed mental health expert and advocate, harbors a past as vibrant as his current professional pursuits. Before his doctoral days, the world knew him as DJ Ra, spinning tracks in the most electrifying gay nightclubs across global capitals. His journey through the highs of fame was a prelude to personal transformation. Encountering the consequences of an intense lifestyle led him to therapy, revealing the scars of an anti-gay upbringing. Embracing self-love marked the beginning of his dedication to mental health, inspiring a profound shift from electrifying dance floors to empowering lives in the LGBTQ+ community and beyond. With a Master of Social Work from UNLV and a groundbreaking PhD in Depth Psychology from Pacifica Graduate Institute, Dr. Maggert has pioneered research into the depths of the masculine psyche. As an educator and a seasoned practitioner, his mastery extends from academia to the frontlines of mental health advocacy. His specializations in advanced therapeutic techniques have revolutionized treatment paradigms. At the helm of three VA mental health programs and at the heart of his private practice, Dragonfly Psychotherapy, Dr. Maggert is a trailblazer for trauma and addiction recovery within the LGBTQ+ community. Beyond his professional prowess, he is a Zen Buddhist adept, weaving the tranquility of meditation into his therapeutic approach and sharing his wisdom at the Houston Zen Center. Dr. Maggert's life's work is not just his occupation, but his offering to the world. Connect With Wade Website Instagram Hey Guys, Check This Out! Are you a guy who keeps struggling to do that thing? You know the thing you keep telling yourself and others you’re going to do, but never do? Then it’s time to get real and figure out why. Join the 40 Plus: Gay Men Gay Talk, monthly chats. They happen the third Monday of each month at 5:00 pm Pacific - Learn More! Break free of fears. Make bold moves. Live life without apologies

14 Feb 43min

Sex. Sexual Dysfunction. You're junk just ain't working right. Don't panic gay men. But get the right help. Today, Dr. Joshua R. Gonzalez, a board-certified urologist and sexual health specialist based in West Hollywood, dives deep into the world of gay mens sexual health, hormone balance, and of course the overall biggest challenge - erectile dysfunction. Trust me this Doc delivers!!! Today we tackle... Managing erectile dysfunction (ED) and arousal disorders. The latest breakthroughs in sexual health technology, like SoftWave® therapy and penile doppler ultrasounds. Tailored care for the LGBTQ+ community and addressing unique health challenges. Minimally invasive solutions for common urological issues, including BPH and hormone imbalances. Whether you’re curious about restoring vitality, enhancing intimacy, or simply learning more about your bod and sexual health as a gay man, you won't want to miss this conversation backed by science and delivered with compassionate care. About Dr. Gonzales Joshua R. Gonzalez, MD, is a board-certified and fellowship-trained urologist and sexual medicine specialist who focuses on managing sexual dysfunctions in men and women at his self-named practice, Joshua R. Gonzalez, MD, in the West Hollywood neighborhood of Los Angeles, California. At his state-of-the-art facility, Dr. Gonzalez understands the toll hormone deficiencies, menopause, arousal disorders, and erectile dysfunction (ED) can take on one’s quality of life. He offers complete general urology and sexual health care at his office to patients, many of who identify as members of the LGBTQ+ community. He invests in advanced technology, such as penile doppler ultrasounds and SoftWave® therapy, to ensure that his patients receive the highest quality of care without invasive surgery. He strives to uncover the root of sexual dysfunction through comprehensive testing one-on-one time with his patients. Dr. Gonzalez uses his extensive experience to find the best treatment for every patient, whether they have a hormone imbalance or an enlarged prostate. The practice is home to a wide range of minimally invasive treatments for urology and sexual dysfunction treatments, including UroLift® for benign prostatic hyperplasia (BPH) and hormone replacement therapy (HRT). Dr. Gonzalez aims to help every patient restore their vitality and regain control over their sexual function. Connect With Dr. Gonzales Instagram Dr. Joshua's Testosterone Replacement Website Hey Guys, Check This Out! Are you a guy who keeps struggling to do that thing? You know the thing you keep telling yourself and others you’re going to do, but never do? Then it’s time to get real and figure out why. Join the 40 Plus: Gay Men Gay Talk, monthly chats. They happen the third Monday of each month at 5:00 pm Pacific - Learn More! Also, join our Facebook Community - 40 Plus: Gay Men, Gay Talk Community Break free of fears. Make bold moves. Live life without apologies

7 Feb 36min

Let's be honest. The planet is a little crazy these days, from politics to divides amongst us as humans on a wide variety of issues - including our rights being stripped away for being LGBTQ+-  it is only going to get more challenging for many of us in marginalized communities. Today's podcast is for you gay men, truly for you, to help you find ways to navigate these challenging times and to stay resilient even in the face of those who would have us erased. Here's tips for staying on track, and being good to yourself. Hey Guys, Check This Out! Are you a guy who keeps struggling to do that thing? You know the thing you keep telling yourself and others you’re going to do, but never do? Then it’s time to get real and figure out why. Join the 40 Plus: Gay Men Gay Talk, monthly chats. They happen the third Monday of each month at 5:00 pm Pacific - Learn More! Also, join our Facebook Community - 40 Plus: Gay Men, Gay Talk Community Break free of fears. Make bold moves. Live life without apologies

1 Feb 15min

Disco! For most gay men of a certain age - like those of you who listen to 40 Plus: Gay Men, Gay Talk - Disco represented so much of our lives then and now. It was the age of freedom, fun, pushing the "extremes" and also the age of loss due the HIV/AIDS epidemic. In his newly released book, Author Frank DeCaro, takes us on a frolicking, entertaining, yet serious tribute to the overlooked art form of disco, which has never been given its proper due, nor taken its true place in the historic struggle for LGBTQ+, gender, and racial equality. Key lessons you'll learn: How Disco became a movement towards more LGBTQ+ rights Gain a glimpse into some of the stories in the Disco era that shaped us as gay men today Discover how Disco can still teach us so many thing about our present day struggls as LGBTQ+ individuals About Frank Frank DeCaro’s work has appeared in myriad publications including the New York Times Magazine, Martha Stewart Living, Entertainment Weekly, Newsweek, Vogue, and the Advocate. He is also the author of Rizzoli’s Drag: Combing Through the Big Wigs of Show Business. on their journey. Connect With Frank Website Hey Guys, Check This Out! Are you a guy who keeps struggling to do that thing? You know the thing you keep telling yourself and others you’re going to do, but never do? Then it’s time to get real and figure out why. Join the 40 Plus: Gay Men Gay Talk, monthly chats. They happen the third Monday of each month at 5:00 pm Pacific - Learn More! Also, join our Facebook Community - 40 Plus: Gay Men, Gay Talk Community Break free of fears. Make bold moves. Live life without apologies

24 Jan 47min

Some of the deepest challenges we face as gay men, is letting go of shame around virtually everything we do. From sex and relationships, to body image and the overt need to prove ourselves in our careers. Today, along with my guest, Brandon Simpson, we cover a wide variety of topics to help you bring more joy into your life as a gay or bisexual man without letting today’s world, steal your confidence to be you. This week, we’re breaking down: Shame: How to release the weight of societal judgments and embrace your authentic self. Boundaries: Why setting them is self-care, not selfish. The Tech Effect: How apps and screens have changed the way we connect—and how to find real intimacy in a digital age. The Bright Side of Sex & Porn: Let’s talk about pleasure, exploration, and how to embrace the positive role they can play in our lives. Through this honest conversations we hope you find wayst to build confidence, foster connection, and live unapologetically in the world. About Brandon Brandon Simpson is an Associate Therapist in Southern California. Throughout Brandon’s career, he has made it his mission to create safe spaces for LGBTQ people to be their most authentic self, without the pressure of the work around them. Brandon is trained through the International Institute for Trauma & Addiction Professionals to help individuals and couples affected by sex and porn addiction. Brandon chose to become a therapist to create nonjudgmental spaces for open dialogue where people can pave the way for personal growth and healing. Connect With Brandon Website Instagram Hey Guys, Check This Out! Are you a guy who keeps struggling to do that thing? You know the thing you keep telling yourself and others you’re going to do, but never do? Then it’s time to get real and figure out why. Join the 40 Plus: Gay Men Gay Talk, monthly chats. They happen the third Monday of each month at 5:00 pm Pacific - Learn More! Also, join our Facebook Community - 40 Plus: Gay Men, Gay Talk Community Break free of fears. Make bold moves. Live life without apologies

17 Jan 44min