What Science and Buddhism Say About How to Regulate Your Own Nervous System | Deb Dana & Kaira Jewel Lingo

What Science and Buddhism Say About How to Regulate Your Own Nervous System | Deb Dana & Kaira Jewel Lingo

Is it possible to learn to spot which state your nervous system is in and move from suboptimal states to much better ones? The subject of how to work with your own nervous system is called Polyvagal Theory and today’s guests Deb Dana & Kaira Jewel Lingo will give us a primer on what that exactly means. They will also talk about how our nervous systems are connected to the nervous systems of other people, and how we can learn to co-regulate our systems for the betterment of others.


Deb Dana is a Licensed Clinical Social Worker, who is a clinician, consultant and author specializing in complex trauma. Her work is focused on using the lens of Polyvagal Theory to understand and resolve the impact of trauma, and creating ways of working that honor the role of the autonomic nervous system. She has written several books, including Anchored: How to Befriend Your Nervous System Using Polyvagal Theory.

Kaira Jewel Lingo is a Dharma teacher with a lifelong interest in spirituality and social justice. After living as an ordained nun for 15 years in Thich Nhat Hanh’s monastic community, Kaira Jewel now teaches internationally in the Zen lineage and the Vipassana tradition, as well as in secular mindfulness, with a focus on activists, Black, Indigenous, and People of Color, artists, educators, families, and youth. She is author of We Were Made for These Times: Ten Lessons for Moving Through Change, Loss, and Disruption.

This is the third installment of our series called, The Art and Science of Keeping Your Sh*t Together. In each episode we bring together a meditative adept or Buddhist scholar and a respected scientist. The idea is to give you the best of both worlds to arm you with both modern and ancient tools for regulating your emotions.


In this episode we talk about:

  • The basics of Polyvagal Theory
  • A fascinating and easily graspable concept from Buddhist psychology called, “store consciousness”
  • The interconnectedness of our nervous systems and the responsibility that creates for all of us
  • How to handle being annoyed
  • What happens when we beat ourselves up with “shoulds,” and how to stop doing that
  • The value of simply knowing, in the moments when you’re stuck, that those moments are impermanent
  • How to allow your suffering to inform your life
  • The value of “micro-moments”
  • Two ways of caring for painful states without suppressing them
  • And the power of action and service in overcoming anxiety



Full Shownotes: www.tenpercent.com/podcast-episode/deb-dana-kaira-jewel-lingo-522

Episoder(926)

From The Happiness Lab with Dr. Laurie Santos | Being Here Now with Tony Hale

From The Happiness Lab with Dr. Laurie Santos | Being Here Now with Tony Hale

We're sharing a preview of another podcast we love, The Happiness Lab. On The Happiness Lab, Dr. Laurie Santos explores all the ways we get our happiness wrong and what we can to do really feel better. She walks through the latest evidence-based strategies for improving your mental health, sharing practical advice on what will really bring more joy. In her latest New Year season of The Happiness Lab, Laurie tackles how to listen to the inner voice of what we really need in the new year. We're often looking into the future... hunting for the "next big thing." We can get so fixated with these events and the happiness we hope they'll deliver, that we forget to look for joy right now. Actor and author Tony Hale (Veep, The Mysterious Benedict Society, Arrested Development) joins Laurie to discuss how he was always chasing new accomplishments, until he realized he was missing the chance to be happy living in the moment. You can hear more from The Happiness Lab at https://podcasts.pushkin.fm/thls6?sid=tph/.

16 Jan 202337min

 Lessons From the World’s Longest Scientific Study of Happiness | Dr. Robert Waldinger

Lessons From the World’s Longest Scientific Study of Happiness | Dr. Robert Waldinger

New episodes come out every Monday, Wednesday, and Friday for free, with 1-week early access for Wondery+ subscribers. Today’s guest is the man in charge of the world’s longest scientific study of happiness, a study that has been running since 1938.  Dr. Robert Waldinger is a professor of psychiatry at Harvard Medical School, the director of the Harvard Study of Adult Development at Massachusetts General Hospital, and co-founder of the Lifespan Research Foundation. He is also a Zen master and teaches meditation in New England and around the world. His TED Talk is one of the most viewed of all time, with over 43 million views. He’s the co-author, along with Dr. Marc Schulz, of The Good Life. In this episode we talk about:  What the Harvard Study of Adult Development is and how it got started How much of our happiness is really under our control Why you can’t you be happy all the time The concept of “social fitness”  Why you should “never worry alone”  How having best friends at work can make you more productive And why, in his words, it’s never too late to be happy Full Shownotes: https://www.tenpercent.com/podcast-episode/robert-waldinger-549

16 Jan 20231h 2min

The Dharma of Money | Spencer Sherman

The Dharma of Money | Spencer Sherman

When we think about Buddhism or the dharma, we probably don’t think about money.  But when the Buddha laid out guidelines about how to make an ethical livelihood, this didn’t preclude material success. This episode is part two of this week’s series on money, and dives into how we can bring Buddhist principles to an area of our lives that can create so much fear, greed, and dread.  Spencer Sherman is the founding CEO of Abacus, a values-driven financial firm, and certified mindfulness teacher.  He teaches the Fearless Finance program and The Mastery of Money program for NYU’s Inner MBA program.  He is also the author of The Cure For Money Madness. In this episode we talk about:  How to identify and reframe our potentially harmful beliefs about money How to apply the Four Brahma Viharas to having a healthier relationship with our finances How to use the RAIN technique when we become anxious about money Spencer’s ‘Enough Practice’ designed to give us a sense of equanimity  How generosity helps us let go and can create a sense of abundance  How mindfulness of money can key us into interconnection And whether you can actually be a successful investor if you’re guided by Buddhist values Full Shownotes: https://www.tenpercent.com/podcast-episode/spencer-sherman-544

11 Jan 20231h 11min

The Psychology of Money | Morgan Housel

The Psychology of Money | Morgan Housel

Money is often a messy and complicated topic that provokes a lot of anxiety.  Today’s show is the first episode of a two-part series on managing our relationship to money and understanding what role money really plays when it comes to our happiness.  Morgan Housel is the author of The Psychology of Money: Timeless Lessons on Wealth, Greed, and Happiness. Translated into over 50 languages with over two million copies sold, Housel is a two-time winner of the Best in Business Award from the Society of American Business Editors and Writers, winner of the New York Times Sidney Award, and a two-time finalist for the Gerald Loeb Award for Distinguished Business and Financial Journalism.  In this conversation we talk about:  The difference between happiness and contentment The difference between being rich and being wealthy The elusive but crucial concept of “enough” The importance of not moving the goalposts when it comes to enough-ness Why financial success is more about behavior than intelligence How our lived experiences impact our perspectives on money  Full Shownotes: https://www.tenpercent.com/podcast-episode/morgan-housel-543

9 Jan 20231h 14min

The Enlightened Mind | Part 5 of The Dalai Lama's Guide to Happiness

The Enlightened Mind | Part 5 of The Dalai Lama's Guide to Happiness

What is the Dalai Lama’s own meditation practice like? In this final episode, the Dalai Lama goes into great detail about the whys and wherefores of meditation, taking us way into the deep end. We cover single-pointed versus analytical meditation, gross and subtle levels of the mind, “true cessation,” and how we can use sleep as practice for the moment of death. Dr. Davidson returns to explain key, esoteric terms and to help us understand how we can apply elements of the Dalai Lama’s practice to our everyday lives. Want more of The Dalai Lama’s Guide to Happiness? Download the Ten Percent Happier app wherever you get your apps. Full Show Notes: https://www.tenpercent.com/podcast-episode/dalai-lama-guide-542 Other Resources Mentioned: Healthy Minds Innovations Thukdam Additional Resources: Download the Ten Percent Happier app today: https://10percenthappier.app.link/JoinChallengePod

6 Jan 202344min

Is Reincarnation Real? | Part 4 of The Dalai Lama's Guide to Happiness

Is Reincarnation Real? | Part 4 of The Dalai Lama's Guide to Happiness

One of the Dalai Lama‘s most challenging teachings, especially for secular western minds, is reincarnation. In this episode, His Holiness describes the Buddhist deity who he believes to be his “boss.” Dan then sits down with Richie again to discuss whether there is any scientific evidence for rebirth. The episode begins and ends with emotional moments, where members of our team respond with tears to being in the presence of the Dalai Lama. Want more of The Dalai Lama’s Guide to Happiness? Download the Ten Percent Happier app wherever you get your apps. Full Show Notes: https://www.tenpercent.com/podcast-episode/dalai-lama-guide-541 Other Resources Mentioned: Healthy Minds Innovations UVA research on reincarnation Additional Resources: Download the Ten Percent Happier app today: https://10percenthappier.app.link/JoinChallengePod

5 Jan 202333min

Wise Selfishness | Part 3 of The Dalai Lama's Guide to Happiness

Wise Selfishness | Part 3 of The Dalai Lama's Guide to Happiness

How can we get better at selfishness? That’s one of many fascinating topics we cover in this episode, in which we play snippets from Dan’s one-on-one interview with His Holiness, and then unpack it all with Dr. Richard Davidson, neuroscientist and founder of the Center for Healthy Minds. We talk to His Holiness about “wise selfishness,” how to handle our enemies, and whether he ever gets angry. Then Richie recounts a time when His Holiness exhibited a rare flash of anger— towards him, in fact. Want more of The Dalai Lama’s Guide to Happiness? Download the Ten Percent Happier app wherever you get your apps. Full Shownotes: https://www.tenpercent.com/podcast-episode/dalai-lama-guide-540 Other Resources Mentioned: Healthy Minds Innovations Additional Resources: Download the Ten Percent Happier app today: https://10percenthappier.app.link/JoinChallengePod

4 Jan 202333min

The Cake Incident | Part 2 of The Dalai Lama’s Guide to Happiness

The Cake Incident | Part 2 of The Dalai Lama’s Guide to Happiness

The Dalai Lama makes a risky move. When confronted by a young American woman coping with incredible loss, he does something surprising and counterintuitive. The incident surfaces a question that is more urgent now than ever: As social media, tribalism, individualism, and a global pandemic conspire to keep us separated from each other, how do we maintain what psychologists call “social fitness”? In conversation with Dr. Richard J. Davidson, world renowned neuroscientist and longtime friend and collaborator of the Dalai Lama, we unpack the scientifically demonstrated benefits of the social connection embodied by His Holiness, and give easily accessible strategies to incorporate this wisdom into your everyday life. Also, Dan has a bit of an identity crisis.  Want more of The Dalai Lama’s Guide to Happiness? Download the Ten Percent Happier app wherever you get your apps. Full Shownotes: https://www.tenpercent.com/podcast-episode/dalai-lama-guide-539 Other Resources Mentioned: Healthy Minds Innovations Compassionate Leadership Summit The Wellbeing Project Additional Resources: Download the Ten Percent Happier app today: https://10percenthappier.app.link/JoinChallengePod

3 Jan 202329min

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