The Art and Science of the World’s Gooiest Cliche | Barbara Fredrickson

The Art and Science of the World’s Gooiest Cliche | Barbara Fredrickson

One of our primary missions on this show is to rescue vital ideas that have lapsed into cliches. There are so many important concepts out there that many of us might be tempted to dismiss because they are encrusted with cultural baggage or have been reduced to potentially annoying or sappy slogans. So, for example, we’ve talked a lot on this podcast about things like: hope, gratitude, and “listening to your body.” All of which can sound like the type of empty bromide that your spin instructor yells at you while encouraging you to pedal faster. But, in fact, these are all incredibly important operating principles for a healthy life. And, not for nothing, they are all backed up by hard science. So today we’re going to tackle what may be the oldest and gooieset cliche of them all: love. The word has been ruined, in many ways, by Hollywood and pop songs. For many of us, the mere mention of the word conjures images of Tom Cruise, with tears in his eyes, while the string music swells, declaring, “You complete me.” But in my view, and in the view of my guest today, love needs to be usefully defined down. In other words, we need to knock love off its plinth, and apply it to a much wider range of human interactions. We also need to think of love not as something magical that requires luck or money or looks, but instead as a trainable skill -- one with profound implications for our health. Barbara Fredrickson is the Kenan Distinguished Professor in the Department of Psychology and Neuroscience at the University of North Carolina at Chapel Hill. She has written two books: one is called Positivity, the other is called Love 2.0. In this interview, we talk about how she defines love, based on her research; how meditation can help build this skill; how taking a few extra minutes to chat with people, even if you feel busy, can have psychological, physiological, and even professional benefits; and how to manage social anxiety as we emerge from our Covid cocoons. This episode is actually part one of a two-part series running this week on social connection. Coming up on Wednesday, we’ll hear from Marissa King, a professor at Yale who studies how to create social networks, even when it feels uncomfortable. And by social network, I don't mean something like Facebook. I mean actual networks of actual human beings that you see in person. She’s got a lot of practical and actionable advice about how to do that, even within the context of Covid. So be sure to listen in on Wednesday. One more item of business, and it is an invitation for you to participate in this show. In June, we’ll be launching a special series of podcast episodes focusing on anxiety, something I’m sure we’re all too familiar with. In this series, you’ll become intimately familiar with the mechanics of anxiety: how and why it shows up, and what you may be doing to feed it. And this is where you come in. We’d love to hear from you with your questions about anxiety that experts will answer during our anxiety series on the podcast. So whether you’re struggling with social anxiety, anxiety about re-entering the world post-Covid, or have any other questions about anxiety - we want to hear from you. To submit a question or share a reflection call (646) 883-8326 and leave us a voicemail with your name and phone number. If you’re outside the United States, you can email us a voice memo file in mp3 format to listener@tenpercent.com. The deadline for submissions is Wednesday, May 12th. And if you don't already have the Ten Percent Happier app, download it for free wherever you get your apps or by clicking here: https://www.tenpercent.com/?_branch_match_id=888540266380716858. Full Shownotes: https://www.tenpercent.com/podcast-episode/barbara-fredrickson-341

Episoder(926)

How To Live Well—Even Amidst Failure, Uncertainty, Loss, and Physical Pain | Kieran Setiya

How To Live Well—Even Amidst Failure, Uncertainty, Loss, and Physical Pain | Kieran Setiya

Practical ways to lead a good life.  Kieran Setiya is the Peter de Florez Professor of Philosophy at MIT, where he works on ethics and related questions about human agency and human knowledge. He is the author of Midlife: A Philosophical Guide and Life Is Hard: How Philosophy Can Help Us Find Our Way. He also maintains a Substack newsletter, Under the Net. In this episode we talk about: How Kieran became interested in practical philosophy (and philosophy more generally) A brief history of philosophy  The connection between philosophy and self-help Whether Buddhism is a philosophy? The upside of missing out (as opposed to FOMO)  Kieran’s mild beef with the Stoics techniques for dealing with grief and loss  Why living well is not the same as feeling happy The connection between Plato, Aristotle and contemporary influencers today  How to deal with physical adversity  Navigating failure  Kieran’s case for meditation  Operationalizing the cliché of “enjoying the process” rather than the outcome How to deal with the injustices of the world Join Dan’s online community here Follow Dan on social: Instagram, TikTok Subscribe to our YouTube Channel   On Sunday, September 21st from 1-5pm ET, join Dan and Leslie Booker at the New York Insight Meditation Center in NYC as they lead a workshop titled, "Heavily Meditated – The Dharma of Depression + Anxiety." This event is both in-person and online. Sign up here! Get ready for another Meditation Party at Omega Institute! This in-person workshop brings together Dan with his friends and meditation teachers, Sebene Selassie, Jeff Warren, and for the first time, Ofosu Jones-Quartey. The event runs October 24th-26th. Sign up and learn more here! SPONSORS: Bumble: Thinking about dating again? Take this as your sign and start your love story on Bumble.    AT&T: Staying connected matters. That's why AT&T has connectivity you can depend on, or they will proactively make it right. Visit att.com/guarantee for details. Function: Our first 1000 listeners get a $100 credit toward their membership. Visit www.functionhealth.com/Happier or use the gift code Happier100 at signup to own your health. To advertise on the show, contact sales@advertisecast.com or visit https://advertising.libsyn.com/10HappierwithDanHarris

22 Sep 1h 18min

How To Make Time for the Things You Actually Care About | Vinny Ferraro

How To Make Time for the Things You Actually Care About | Vinny Ferraro

Our Teacher of the Month answers a common question: how do I find the time to meditate? Vinny turns this question on its head, and his answer might surprise you.   Join Dan’s online community here Follow Dan on social: Instagram, TikTok Subscribe to our YouTube Channel Get ready for another Meditation Party at Omega Institute! This in-person workshop brings together Dan with his friends and meditation teachers, Sebene Selassie, Jeff Warren, and for the first time, Ofosu Jones-Quartey. The event runs October 24th-26th. Sign up and learn more at eomega.org/workshops/meditation-party-2025.   To advertise on the show, contact sales@advertisecast.com or visit https://advertising.libsyn.com/10HappierwithDanHarris   SPONSORS:  Airbnb: Your home might be worth more than you think. Find out how much at airbnb.com/host. Odoo: Discover how you can take your business to the next level by visiting odoo.com. Modern management made simple.

21 Sep 18min

Matthew McConaughey On: His Morning Routine; When To Take Risks; How To Bounce Back From Fuckups; And the Dangers of Cynicism

Matthew McConaughey On: His Morning Routine; When To Take Risks; How To Bounce Back From Fuckups; And the Dangers of Cynicism

A guide to navigating “the rodeo of life”.   Academy Award–winning actor and #1 New York Times bestselling author Matthew McConaughey is a husband and a father, an eternal optimist, a hopeful skeptic, and a man of faith who believes that we should all start sellin’ Sunday morning like a Saturday night. His latest book is Poems and Prayers.   In this episode we talk about: What Matthew’s prayer practice looks like How to figure out what your beliefs are  His relationship with doubt and humility  How to reframe your relationship with failure, risk, and embarrassment  Morning rituals and how to prepare for the day Sins, cynicism, and what to do when things get hard Matthew’s take on the world Misconceptions of ‘good’ and ‘evil’ The difference between ‘hope’ and ‘belief’  Why “belief is punk rock” And more Join Dan’s online community here Follow Dan on social: Instagram, TikTok Subscribe to our YouTube Channel   On Sunday, September 21st from 1-5pm ET, join Dan and Leslie Booker at the New York Insight Meditation Center in NYC as they lead a workshop titled, "Heavily Meditated – The Dharma of Depression + Anxiety." This event is both in-person and online. Sign up here!   Get ready for another Meditation Party at Omega Institute! This in-person workshop brings together Dan with his friends and meditation teachers, Sebene Selassie, Jeff Warren, and for the first time, Ofosu Jones-Quartey. The event runs October 24th-26th. Sign up and learn more here! To advertise on the show, contact sales@advertisecast.com or visit https://advertising.libsyn.com/10HappierwithDanHarris SPONSORS:Monarch Money: use code Happier at monarchmoney.com in your browser for half off your first year.

19 Sep 1h 7min

How To Handle Turbulence and Transitions | Phillip Moffitt

How To Handle Turbulence and Transitions | Phillip Moffitt

A Buddhist recipe for reclaiming your sanity. Phillip Moffitt is a Buddhist meditation teacher and writer based in the San Francisco Bay Area in California. He has written several books and is also the founder and president of Life Balance Institute.  In this episode we talk about: A Buddhist recipe for navigating life’s ups and downs Mindfulness tools for happier and smarter transitions We dive into the the Noble eightfold path   Managing transitions with maximal happiness and resilience Join Dan’s online community here Follow Dan on social: Instagram, TikTok Subscribe to our YouTube Channel   Additional Resources:  To join Phillip’s email list, sign up here.   Phillip's “Core Values and Essential Intentions Worksheet”   On Sunday, September 21st from 1-5pm ET, join Dan and Leslie Booker at the New York Insight Meditation Center in NYC as they lead a workshop titled, "Heavily Meditated – The Dharma of Depression + Anxiety." This event is both in-person and online. Sign up here!   Get ready for another Meditation Party at Omega Institute! This in-person workshop brings together Dan with his friends and meditation teachers, Sebene Selassie, Jeff Warren, and for the first time, Ofosu Jones-Quartey. The event runs October 24th-26th. Sign up and learn more here!   To advertise on the show, contact sales@advertisecast.com or visit https://advertising.libsyn.com/10HappierwithDanHarris Sponsors:  AT&T: Staying connected matters. That's why AT&T has connectivity you can depend on, or they will proactively make it right. Visit att.com/guarantee for details. Function: Our first 1000 listeners get a $100 credit toward their membership. Visit www.functionhealth.com/Happier or use the gift code Happier100 at signup to own your health.

17 Sep 1h 10min

What Should You Do With Your Life? | Suzy Welch

What Should You Do With Your Life? | Suzy Welch

Are you living by default or by design? A provocative question from an NYU business professor.   Suzy Welch is an award-winning NYU Stern School of Business professor, acclaimed management researcher, and New York Times best-selling author, most recently with “Becoming You: A Proven Method for Crafting Your Authentic Life and Career.”   In this episode we talk about: The distinction between purpose and happiness What values actually are––and why it’s so hard for people to name their own  15 of the most significant core values The importance of knowing how other people experience your personality  Tools for envisioning your desired future  Why knowing your passion is not enough And much more Join Dan’s online community here Follow Dan on social: Instagram, TikTok Subscribe to our YouTube Channel Additional Resources:  Values Bridge Pie 360  Suzy’s books On Sunday, September 21st from 1-5pm ET, join Dan and Leslie Booker at the New York Insight Meditation Center in NYC as they lead a workshop titled, "Heavily Meditated – The Dharma of Depression + Anxiety." This event is both in-person and online. Sign up here!   Get ready for another Meditation Party at Omega Institute! This in-person workshop brings together Dan with his friends and meditation teachers, Sebene Selassie, Jeff Warren, and for the first time, Ofosu Jones-Quartey. The event runs October 24th-26th. Sign up and learn more here! To advertise on the show, contact sales@advertisecast.com or visit https://advertising.libsyn.com/10HappierwithDanHarris     Sponsors: AT&T: Staying connected matters. That's why AT&T has connectivity you can depend on, or they will proactively make it right. Visit att.com/guarantee for details. Coop Sleep Goods: Upgrade your sleep. Visit coopsleepgoods.com/happier10 to get 20% off your first order.

15 Sep 59min

How To Cut Yourself Some Slack | Meditation with Vinny Ferraro

How To Cut Yourself Some Slack | Meditation with Vinny Ferraro

Guess what: you don’t have to fix yourself.  All this month, we’re sharing custom guided meditations from our teacher of the month, Vinny Ferraro, exclusively available at DanHarris.com. Like any good drug dealer, the first taste is free – so today, we’re giving you a sample of what you can expect for the rest of the month. Related Episodes: You Can’t Hate Yourself Into Becoming a Better Person | Vinny Ferraro On Sunday, September 21st from 1-5pm ET, join Dan and Leslie Booker at the New York Insight Meditation Center in NYC as they lead a workshop titled, "Heavily Meditated – The Dharma of Depression + Anxiety." This event is both in-person and online. Sign up here! Get ready for another Meditation Party at Omega Institute! This in-person workshop brings together Dan with his friends and meditation teachers, Sebene Selassie, Jeff Warren, and for the first time, Ofosu Jones-Quartey. The event runs October 24th-26th. Sign up and learn more at eomega.org/workshops/meditation-party-2025.   Join Dan’s online community here Follow Dan on social: Instagram, TikTok Subscribe to our YouTube Channel   To advertise on the show, contact sales@advertisecast.com or visit https://advertising.libsyn.com/10HappierwithDanHarris

14 Sep 18min

What To Do When Your Life Blows up | Emma Heming Willis

What To Do When Your Life Blows up | Emma Heming Willis

When life gets turbulent, is self-care self-indulgent?   Emma Heming Willis is a mother, step-mother, wife, and an advocate. After her husband, Bruce Willis, was diagnosed with frontotemporal dementia, she became a passionate voice for care partners and families navigating neurodegenerative disease. Her new book is called The Unexpected Journey: Finding Strength, Hope, and Yourself on the Caregiving Path.   In this episode we talk about: The moment Bruce was diagnosed  The importance of self-care and community support for caregivers  Actionable advice on making time for oneself  How to ask for and accept help when you need it Why learning to care for other people is a skill we should all develop (and how it might actually enhance your life) Tools for dealing with life’s most difficult emotions  How to reframe painful experiences  And much more Join Dan’s online community here Follow Dan on social: Instagram, TikTok Subscribe to our YouTube Channel On Sunday, September 21st from 1-5pm ET, join Dan and Leslie Booker at the New York Insight Meditation Center in NYC as they lead a workshop titled, "Heavily Meditated – The Dharma of Depression + Anxiety." This event is both in-person and online. Sign up here!   Get ready for another Meditation Party at Omega Institute! This in-person workshop brings together Dan with his friends and meditation teachers, Sebene Selassie, Jeff Warren, and for the first time, Ofosu Jones-Quartey. The event runs October 24th-26th. Sign up and learn more here! To advertise on the show, contact sales@advertisecast.com or visit https://advertising.libsyn.com/10HappierwithDanHarris

12 Sep 1h 26min

How To Rewire Your Inner Dialogue and Re-Regulate Your Nervous System | Elizabeth Gilbert

How To Rewire Your Inner Dialogue and Re-Regulate Your Nervous System | Elizabeth Gilbert

A raw conversation about addiction, love, death, grief, recovery, and more. Elizabeth Gilbert is the #1 New York Times bestselling author of nonfiction and fiction books such as Big Magic and Eat Pray Love. Her new memoir is All The Way To The River: Love, Loss, and Liberation. In this episode we talk about: Ways that Elizabeth fostered dependency in her life  What Elizabeth means when she says “make other people into my home” The modalities and practices Elizabeth uses to ground in her daily life The definition of healthy relationships – and how to have them  Self-compassion Join Dan’s online community here Follow Dan on social: Instagram, TikTok Subscribe to our YouTube Channel On Sunday, September 21st from 1-5pm ET, join Dan and Leslie Booker at the New York Insight Meditation Center in NYC as they lead a workshop titled, "Heavily Meditated – The Dharma of Depression + Anxiety." This event is both in-person and online. Sign up here!  Get ready for another Meditation Party at Omega Institute! This in-person workshop brings together Dan with his friends and meditation teachers, Sebene Selassie, Jeff Warren, and for the first time, Ofosu Jones-Quartey. The event runs October 24th-26th. Sign up and learn more here!   To advertise on the show, contact sales@advertisecast.com or visit https://advertising.libsyn.com/10HappierwithDanHarris Sponsors:  Stitch Fix: Get started today with stitchfix.com/happier and get 20% off your first order when you buy five or more items. AT&T: Staying connected matters. That's why AT&T has connectivity you can depend on, or they will proactively make it right. Visit att.com/guarantee for details.

10 Sep 1h 5min

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