How to Handle Anger, Uncertainty, and Self-Loathing | Mushim Patricia Ikeda

How to Handle Anger, Uncertainty, and Self-Loathing | Mushim Patricia Ikeda

When somebody wrongs you, what is the wise way to handle your anger? Is forgiveness possible? What about friendliness? My guest today has a lot of thoughts about how to handle anger and how to respond to people who mean you harm. It might surprise you to hear from a Buddhist teacher who actually isn’t utterly disparaging of anger. In fact, she is proud (somewhat facetiously) of having been called “the original Angry Asian Buddhist.” Her name is Mushim Patricia Ikeda, and she is my kind of Buddhist. She self-describes as “snarky,” and, as you will hear, she loves to laugh. She has doable, down-to-earth strategies, and she makes a compelling, if counterintuitive, case for the pragmatism of sending goodwill to people who want to harm you. Mushim is a core teacher at the East Bay Meditation Center. She is a writer, activist, and diversity consultant. She has trained for decades as both a lay and monastic Buddhist. Aside from anger, we also discuss how to handle uncertainty, and what Mushim calls a “pandemic of self-loathing” in our culture. But we begin with some candid talk about the trauma of being an Asian-American during a time of rising violence against the AAPI community. This is the second in a two-part series on the uptick in anti-Asian violence -- a trend that should be particularly worrisome for this audience, given the Asian roots of meditation and many of the other happiness-producing modalities we talk about on this show. If you missed it, go check out Monday’s episode, where we explore the history of anti-Buddhist and anti-Asian violence in America (which started decades before the pandemic), and the hurt felt by many Asian-American Buddhists about how they can be overlooked by other American Buddhists, including, sometimes, me. Two other items of business: first, are you interested in teaching mindfulness to teens? Looking to carve your own path and share this practice in a way that feels real, authentic, and relevant in today’s world? Our friends at iBme are accepting applications for their Mindfulness Teacher Training program - catered towards working with teens and young adults. The last round of applications are due May 15th and scholarships are available. For more information and to apply, check out: https://ibme.com/mindfulness-teacher-training/. And second, we want to recognize and deeply thank mental health professionals for all you do. For a year's FREE access to the app and hundreds of meditations and resources, visit: https://www.tenpercent.com/mentalhealth. Full Shownotes: https://www.tenpercent.com/podcast-episode/mushim-patricia-ikeda-344

Episoder(928)

Scott Edelstein, When Spiritual Leaders 'Stray'

Scott Edelstein, When Spiritual Leaders 'Stray'

Spiritual leaders often have great influence over their followers but there are times, author Scott Edelstein says, when some leaders will use their position of power to manipulate, shame and abuse others. Edelstein discusses how spiritual leaders can "stray," even become predatory, and suggests ways for a healthy student-teacher relationships, which he lays out in his book, "Sex and the Spiritual Teacher."

11 Jul 20181h 5min

Jeremy Richman, 'There Is Hope in Helping'

Jeremy Richman, 'There Is Hope in Helping'

Jeremy Richman remembers his daughter Avielle as a fun spirit with "this unbelievable smile that she would just give out to anybody," who was as happy playing dress-up as a fairy at a ball as she was practicing Kung Fu and shooting a bow and arrow outside. Avielle was killed with 19 of her classmates and six educators in the 2012 Sandy Hook Elementary School shooting in Newtown, Connecticut, and in her memory, the Richmans started The Avielle Foundation, which funds research on brain health and causations for violent behaviors.

4 Jul 20181h 3min

Alison Wright, World-Traveling Photographer

Alison Wright, World-Traveling Photographer

Her body badly broken in a horrific bus crash in Laos, Alison Wright was still trying to breathe as she realized that she may not make it out alive. But not only did she survive, the award-winning National Geographic photographer called upon her years of meditation practice to keep breathing as she re-learned how to walk, overcame months of debilitating pain, climbed Mt. Kilimanjaro and even got back on a bus in Laos, all of which she details in her memoir, "Learning to Breathe: One Woman's Journey of Spirit and Survival."

27 Jun 20181h 8min

Scott Norton, The Condiments Guy Who Meditates

Scott Norton, The Condiments Guy Who Meditates

Since invading the condiments market with Sir Kensington's, a line of ketchup, mustard and other spreads, company co-founder Scott Norton said meditation has helped him slow down and have better self-assessment under the stress of managing a start-up.

20 Jun 201851min

Diana Butler Bass, 100 Days of Gratitude

Diana Butler Bass, 100 Days of Gratitude

Author and religion scholar Diana Butler Bass has tried on many forms of Christianity, from growing up Methodist to becoming an Evangelical Christian for years and then joining the Episcopal Church, where she started exploring Centering Prayer and eventually meditation. Though her 10 books span a range of facets on Christianity, Bass says writing her most recent book, "Grateful: The Transformative Power of Giving Thanks," saved her life.

13 Jun 20181h 4min

Dr. Stephanie Sarkis, Meditating While Having ADHD

Dr. Stephanie Sarkis, Meditating While Having ADHD

Stephanie Sarkis, an author and expert in ADHD, anxiety disorders, autism spectrum disorder and chronic pain, brings a unique perspective to her work because she herself struggles with ADHD and anxiety. Working mostly with adults, from college-age on up, Sarkis said she began recommending mindfulness meditation to her clients and then began a practice herself when she read about the possible benefits and saw positive changes in those she treated.

6 Jun 201856min

Roshi Joan Halifax, 'Turning Towards the Suffering'

Roshi Joan Halifax, 'Turning Towards the Suffering'

Roshi Joan Halifax came to New York City by way of New Orleans in the '60s with a thirst to engage in social justice, protesting "everything related to discrimination," she said, and the Vietnam War. Halifax, whose latest book is called "Standing at the Edge: Finding Freedom Where Fear and Courage Meet," went on to become a Buddhist teacher, Zen priest, anthropologist and a pioneer in the field of end-of-life care who has brought her work into psychiatric programs, penitentiaries and refugee camps.

30 Mai 20181h 7min

Sally Kohn, 'We Need to Fix Hate'

Sally Kohn, 'We Need to Fix Hate'

It was around the time she decided to go on her second meditation retreat that Sally Kohn, a gay, Jewish, community organizer turned political commentator, took a job as a commentator for Fox News. In her TV career -- she's now a commentator for CNN -- Kohn has experienced hateful personal attacks from online trolls and recently faced some backlash over her first book, "The Opposite of Hate: A Field Guide To Repairing Our Humanity," but with her book she has lead a conversation around finding compassion for those who trumpet hate.

23 Mai 20181h 15min

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