Why Am I Like This? The High-Functioning Trauma Edition

Why Am I Like This? The High-Functioning Trauma Edition

This Might Be a Trauma Response: High-Functioning Trauma

Healing Is My Hobby | This Might Be a Trauma Response Series

What if the most common sign of trauma isn't falling apart — it's having it all together?

In this installment of the This Might Be a Trauma Response series, Jessica breaks down high-functioning trauma: what it is, why it's so easy to miss, and the four ways it most commonly shows up in everyday life. This episode is for the person who keeps going, keeps producing, keeps holding it together — and quietly wonders why something still feels off.

In this episode, you'll hear about:

  1. What high-functioning trauma actually is (and why it's not a character flaw)
  2. The four most common high-functioning trauma responses: hyperproductivity, perfectionism, hyperindependence, and fawning
  3. Why each of these patterns started as a survival strategy — and why they're still running even when the danger is gone
  4. The fourth trauma response that doesn't get talked about enough: fawning, or "fight, flight, freeze, or please"
  5. A simple but powerful grounding practice called Values Grounding to bring you back to yourself

This week's healing tool — Values Grounding:

Find a quiet five minutes and sit with these three questions:

  1. Who am I when I'm not performing?
  2. What do I actually value — deeply, quietly, before the world told me who to be?
  3. Is what I'm doing right now aligned with those values, or am I running a pattern that belongs to the past?

Write down 3–5 words. Don't overthink it. Trust what comes first.

If you've been listening to this series and want to go deeper on identity — who you are beneath the trauma and anxiety — Jessica's other podcast, Chasing Brighter (co-hosted with her sister Kelly), is dedicating the entire month of May to Identity and Expectations. Find it at chasingbrighter.com or wherever you listen to podcasts.

Stay connected:

  1. 📬 Sign up for the newsletter + read the blog: healingismyhobby.com
  2. 📩 Send a message: Contact Jessica
  3. 📸 Instagram: @healingismyhobby
  4. 🎥 YouTube: @healingismyhobby
  5. 🖥️ Clinical practice: jessicacolarcolcsw.com | @jessicacolarcolcsw

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Episoder(56)

Why You Can't Stop: When Productivity Starts Feeling Like Safety

Why You Can't Stop: When Productivity Starts Feeling Like Safety

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Healing Moment: The Discomfort of Doing Nothing

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Becoming, Not Arriving

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So many of us are waiting for the moment we finally "arrive." When we lose the weight. When the kids need us less. When work calms down. When we're more organized, more confident, more together... the...

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17 Aug 4min

The Unsent Letter: Releasing What You're Still Carrying

The Unsent Letter: Releasing What You're Still Carrying

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Who Have You Been This Summer?

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It's the first Monday of August, and Jessica invites listeners to pause and take stock — not of who they want to be, but of who they've actually been this summer. In this week's Healing Moment, she of...

3 Aug 3min

Healing Moments: Box Breathing for When Summer Gets Loud

Healing Moments: Box Breathing for When Summer Gets Loud

Summer is beautiful, but summer can also be a lot — family in town, packed schedules, travel logistics, heat, and the slow creep toward the end of the season. In this Healing Moments episode, Jessica ...

27 Jul 3min

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