My Mom Has Dementia, What It's Teaching Me About Life - EP 305

With dementia you don't lose someone all at once. You lose them a little bit at a time.

Some days my mom knows exactly who I am. Some days I'm just a kind face sitting next to her. And that has forced me to sit with a kind of grief most people don't talk about, the grief that shows up while the person you love is still here.

In this episode I get personal about what my mom's dementia has taught me about loss, gratitude and how we choose to live while we're still losing someone. I've watched people handle grief in every possible way. Some go quiet and withdraw. Some stay busy so they never have to stand still. I've done both. And somewhere in the middle of it I stopped asking whether I was grieving the right way and started asking a better question. Am I honoring her with the way I'm choosing to live?

Because here's what I keep coming back to. The people who truly love us don't want our grief to stop our lives. They want their lives to continue through ours. The greatest tribute you can pay someone isn't the amount of sadness you carry after they're gone. It's how much of their life still lives through yours.

My mom taught me how to show up. How to be present. How to make everyone who walks through the door feel like they matter. I built companies with hundreds of people in them, and when I ask myself where I actually learned to care about people, it wasn't a business book or a seminar. It was her kitchen table.

This one is for anyone walking through loss right now, or watching a parent slip away, or bracing for grief they know is coming. Grief is real. Loss is real. But eventually grief has to become gratitude and sadness has to become purpose. And maybe a world-class life isn't about avoiding pain. Maybe it's about refusing to let grief have the final word.

Love doesn't require recognition. I don't show up so she'll remember me. I show up because I remember her.

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